It was the fourteenth of that May
Was after school of that day, yes it was
Babysitter and I went to the mall , she
Went to get some new shoes
Got bored and looked right behind me
At Dillard’s where we were I saw some red shoes

They were female, hey, I’m crazy
So I went and put those red shoes on
Before that took tennis shoes off
Put them on, then walked around a bit
Babysitter told me to take off
The red shoes, cause she was done
I took them off, yes they fit me, yeah

Well, well.

As we were leavin’ here’s what she said
Whispered in my ears that they weren’t
For trying on at all, they were a customers
Actually that lady saw me before I knew and everyone laughed
And yeah that’s right
Almost everyone knows that story by now
Ive told it more times than Ive seen a cow.
This next one takes place in Feb, of 2000

Was walkin’ to the science room
With the rest of my fifth grade class
Apparently my pants were loose
Cause they all the way to tennis shoes
Everyone laughed, cause it was funny
Teacher asked what was going on
And some girl then said that “Jack’s pants be down”

Uh!

In Florida, at a restraunt my parents and I were for lunch
We had the menus from where we would order food
A funny named item was there, that’s a type of mushroom
Start laughin’, cause it’s spelt like “shit-take” ,didn’t know that
It was actually pronounced shuh-tah-kee
That appeared in Austin Powers 3

Last one is also in Florida, I was alone, yay
My movie wouldn’t play (Well, well, well, well)
Call the restraunt my parents were at
(And after awhile) Got called ma’am on the phone
Got called Ma’am right on the phone
My movie worked when I called their phone
(I got called M’am) Over restraunt telephone

They’e em-
Barrassing as hell I know
Got called young lady once in the hall
(By teacher guy) when freshman in high school