Song Parodies -> Hot Springs, Arkansas
| Original Song Title: | "Wheeling, West Virginia" |
| Original Performer: | Neil Sedaka |
| Parody Song Title: | "Hot Springs, Arkansas" |
| Parody Written by: | Iludium Phosdex |
Thorazine, Prozac, even Valium--
Who really needs them when you realise
That there could be a worthwhile alternative
To all the madness of materia medica:
Our great-grandparents went there for relief
When things got a little out of sorts;
But with our healthcare system in near-tatters,
Are you not so aware?
Aware of a place called Hot Springs, Arkansas, where
Hydrotherapeusis can be taken?
Aware of that place named Hot Springs, Arkansas?
Has it become a joke?
Bathhouse Row--now who amongst us
Can still recall that place?
As well as the Display Spring, and all the fountains
To partake of waters there?
Waters still believed in some circles
To be much more effective, indeed,
Than all the meds that your doctor's pushing--
Do you really need all of that?
When there's a place called Hot Springs, Arkansas?
Who needed the Mayo Clinic way back when?
And there's still a place called Hot Springs, Arkansas;
You're probably unaware of it....
Maybe it's time that we went back to those days
When "neurasthenia" meant
A bitter choice between fear of straitjackets
And time down on Bathhouse Row--
Or, better yet, in such hotels like
The Majestic or the Arlington;
They're still around, as far as I know, with
Hydro facilities there!
Perhaps it's time for Hot Springs, Arkansas
Given a new lease on life;
Back, for our health, to Hot Springs, Arkansas;
Why go anyplace else?
Who really needs them when you realise
That there could be a worthwhile alternative
To all the madness of materia medica:
Our great-grandparents went there for relief
When things got a little out of sorts;
But with our healthcare system in near-tatters,
Are you not so aware?
Aware of a place called Hot Springs, Arkansas, where
Hydrotherapeusis can be taken?
Aware of that place named Hot Springs, Arkansas?
Has it become a joke?
Bathhouse Row--now who amongst us
Can still recall that place?
As well as the Display Spring, and all the fountains
To partake of waters there?
Waters still believed in some circles
To be much more effective, indeed,
Than all the meds that your doctor's pushing--
Do you really need all of that?
When there's a place called Hot Springs, Arkansas?
Who needed the Mayo Clinic way back when?
And there's still a place called Hot Springs, Arkansas;
You're probably unaware of it....
Maybe it's time that we went back to those days
When "neurasthenia" meant
A bitter choice between fear of straitjackets
And time down on Bathhouse Row--
Or, better yet, in such hotels like
The Majestic or the Arlington;
They're still around, as far as I know, with
Hydro facilities there!
Perhaps it's time for Hot Springs, Arkansas
Given a new lease on life;
Back, for our health, to Hot Springs, Arkansas;
Why go anyplace else?
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