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Song Parodies -> "If You Do Get Caught Speeding Down South"

Original Song Title:

"You Took The Words Right Out Of My Mouth"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Meatloaf

Parody Song Title:

"If You Do Get Caught Speeding Down South"

Parody Written by:

Mark Scotti

The Lyrics

What if "Deliverence" was set on a highway:

It was a hot southern night with my tires spinning
I peeled burnt rubber over the land
Got her so excited I heard her heart pumping wildly
I hope to see her bra
Strip off to my waiting hands

I was speeding down south to the hotel early
Wow I am flying, all that gas I will waste
She was hotter than my engine with hair swirling
Missed the trooper platoon
They pulled me, off of that highway
Off of that highway
Off of that highway, end chase

They pulled me real close and said not to speak
And I'm such a pretty boy on shaky ground
You're the squeeze of the week so batter up you're new
My lesson learned, I'm his girl friend now

So now if you do get caught speeding down south
And you're a Yank that's the ticket for rear entry
If you do get caught speeding down south
Deliverance true
Those inbreeds are gonna really love you

And now if you do get caught speeding down south
It's the 6 6 6 reverse of Mayberry
If you do get caught speeding down south
Andy yells code "blew"
Barney Fife will use his "bullet" on you

Now my body is treated like these oakies' own daughters
Escape thoughts now I'm beginning to spin
And as they tried to abuse my rights that I was use to
From a near farm
Came sounds that they were drawn to,
Sounds they were drawn to,
They helped me avoid a sore end

They were licking their lips as there were sheep crying
They want running, each cop wanted their taste
I went flying right out there in such perfect timing
By the next day at noon
I'm back from something so abhorrent
Something so abhorrent
Something so abhorrent, rape faced

So now if you do get caught speeding down south
Your very next problem will be alimentary
If you do get caught speeding down south
Your name's Peggy Sue
Southern hospitality reams you

And now if you do get caught speeding down south
The first words you may hear are "Now say suey"
If you do get caught speeding down south
Civil War's renewed
And the cannon they will load will be you

If you do get caught speeding down south
If you do get caught speeding down south...

Copyright 2009

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Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 16

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User Comments

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alvin - May 29, 2009 - Report this comment
especially liked "reverse of mayberry"
Mark Scotti - May 29, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks, Alvin!!!
Leo Keough - May 29, 2009 - Report this comment
Highway 666 Revisited!!!...LOL...555!!!
Mark Scotti - May 29, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks, Leo!
TJC - May 29, 2009 - Report this comment
Holy Dueling Man-Jones!
LOL Leo!
Dadada WaWa...Fives!
Mark Scotti - May 29, 2009 - Report this comment
Banjo picking thanks to you, TJC!!!
NorCALvotress - May 29, 2009 - Report this comment
Oh, those Hot Summer Nights, in those Campagna hills, cruising the El Camino Real, Moon rising o'er MissionPeak, Cowboy clicking his Spurs . . .
Mark Scotti - May 29, 2009 - Report this comment
And the "Brokeback" ones as well. Thanks, NorCal!!
Christie Marie M - May 29, 2009 - Report this comment
Wow, what if Meat Loaf happened to be in that situation? (rhetorical question). Well, anyways, you sped to 555 mph with your song!
AFW - May 29, 2009 - Report this comment
I don't think Ned Beatty would like this...butt I did...555
Mark Scotti - May 29, 2009 - Report this comment
Southern hospitality of thanks to you Christie & AFW!!!
My Cousin Vinnie - May 29, 2009 - Report this comment
Yeah, I know a couple guys dat happened to, ... 'cept'n' dey didn't get reamed for it, they dang near got fried...'n dat pesci Judge almost Tormei a new ahole.. but I put on my Gam-beanie, an wit' my *superiuh* legal skills ('n some help from my beautiful beautician transmission fixin' Mona Lisa, who, if I may say, gives some posi-traction action, if ya get my drift) got da Judge ta Vito da defense "expoit" (ha!) 'n get that Macchio-Man 'n his side-kick offa' da independent-suspension hook.

So, uh, yeah, youse gets da high Fives from me, an' take my advice: if yer a Yankee like me, when ya drive t'ru da Sout', go at a Turtle's pace!
Mark Scotti - May 29, 2009 - Report this comment
Mannny tanks to ya toytal!!!
Chance Gollnick - May 31, 2009 - Report this comment
Just returning a comment and a good job.
Mark Scotti - June 01, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks, Chance!!
Caught Speeding? - August 14, 2009 - Report this comment
www.DrivingOffenceSolicitor.co.uk
Guy - August 14, 2009 - Report this comment
@Vinnie - I knew this was TT writing comment on this parody even before I got to the part about being slow as a turtle.

Mark - I'm not familiar with the OS but I youtubed it and caught the gist. I live in the South my friend - but this South is Texas and we don't play that deliverance crapola 'round here. Texan's have the same problem when driving up north - they spot a vehicle with Texas tags and they automatically think you are trafficing drugs.
Mark Scotti - August 14, 2009 - Report this comment
To Guy, no offense meant. Just felt like doing a creative stereotype, and all in fun. I know how things are in Texas and it was not inferred for there...
Guy - August 14, 2009 - Report this comment
Mark - I don't know what happened but I left a comment here a few hours ago and now it is no longer here. My Time Warner bundle has been up and down a few times today and it may have been lost in the sauce. Anyway I'll attempt to reconstruct what I commented.

Mark - You do realize that this author lives in the south? But my south happens to be in the great Republic of Texas and we don't play that deliverance chit 'round here. In fact cars with Texas tags that venture up north catch the attention of every state trooper and county mounty out there. They think that all cars heading north with Texas tags are muling contraband. Once in Kansas we pulled off the interstate for some food and missed a turn. A cop immediately pounced on us and asked some pointed questions. He then went about his business when he realized that we were not hauling anything illegal.

I DKTOS on this - but I gave a listen to the OS on Youtube. I'm glad that I did - fine job here.
Fiddlegirl - March 12, 2010 - Report this comment
LOL @ "666 reverse of Mayberry"! 555 for the trip home... y'all come back real soon, now! ;)
Mark Scotti - March 13, 2010 - Report this comment
"Get ouut of jain free card" & thanks to Fiddlegirl!!!
Mark Scotti - March 13, 2010 - Report this comment
Damn my keyboard! That's Get OUT of JAIL,,,
Porfle Popnecker - March 23, 2012 - Report this comment
Sometimes a "Get Out of Jane Free" card is just as valuable! Fun parody.
Mark Scotti - March 24, 2012 - Report this comment
Shout of suey...and thanks to you Porfle!
Mark Scotti - March 26, 2012 - Report this comment
Just noticed a typo: They were licking their lips as there were sheep crying They WENT running, each cop wanted their taste
Agrimorfee - March 26, 2012 - Report this comment
May this 555 bring you Deliverance! ;)
Mark Scotti - March 27, 2012 - Report this comment
My banjo plays notes of thanks to you Agri!
Matthias - March 31, 2012 - Report this comment
Not bad... I wish you would have included the spoken intro though. Still not bad at all good sir.
Mark Scotti - April 01, 2012 - Report this comment
Thanks, Matthias! (That is a great spoken into - another great challange!)
bobpiecheese - April 03, 2012 - Report this comment
(Artistry) What, no mention of squealing? That's, like, one of the three things I know about Deliverance: squealing, gratuitous rape and Duelling Banjos. Whatever. This was a bit hard to follow to the song, but I did admire the creative metaphors for, well, sticking things where they don't belong. 555!
Mark Scotti - April 04, 2012 - Report this comment
Metephorically inserting my "thanks" to you, bobpie!
Rex - April 06, 2012 - Report this comment
(Artistry) Sounds like your troubles are behind you now. And now I know why the south is full of furry little kids yelling "da-a-a-a-a-a-dy!" Scary funny.
Below Average Dave - April 06, 2012 - Report this comment
Good story telling. . .
Blaydeman - April 06, 2012 - Report this comment
(Artistry) You have sincerely frightened me... and I liked it! Great job!
Mark Scotti - April 07, 2012 - Report this comment
Some banjo pickin' notes of thanks to Rex, Dave & Blayde!

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