It was a hot southern night with my tires spinning
I peeled burnt rubber over the land
Got her so excited I heard her heart pumping wildly
I hope to see her bra
Strip off to my waiting hands

I was speeding down south to the hotel early
Wow I am flying, all that gas I will waste
She was hotter than my engine with hair swirling
Missed the trooper platoon
They pulled me, off of that highway
Off of that highway
Off of that highway, end chase

They pulled me real close and said not to speak
And I'm such a pretty boy on shaky ground
You're the squeeze of the week so batter up you're new
My lesson learned, I'm his girl friend now

So now if you do get caught speeding down south
And you're a Yank that's the ticket for rear entry
If you do get caught speeding down south
Deliverance true
Those inbreeds are gonna really love you

And now if you do get caught speeding down south
It's the 6 6 6 reverse of Mayberry
If you do get caught speeding down south
Andy yells code "blew"
Barney Fife will use his "bullet" on you

Now my body is treated like these oakies' own daughters
Escape thoughts now I'm beginning to spin
And as they tried to abuse my rights that I was use to
From a near farm
Came sounds that they were drawn to,
Sounds they were drawn to,
They helped me avoid a sore end

They were licking their lips as there were sheep crying
They want running, each cop wanted their taste
I went flying right out there in such perfect timing
By the next day at noon
I'm back from something so abhorrent
Something so abhorrent
Something so abhorrent, rape faced

So now if you do get caught speeding down south
Your very next problem will be alimentary
If you do get caught speeding down south
Your name's Peggy Sue
Southern hospitality reams you

And now if you do get caught speeding down south
The first words you may hear are "Now say suey"
If you do get caught speeding down south
Civil War's renewed
And the cannon they will load will be you

If you do get caught speeding down south
If you do get caught speeding down south...