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Song Parodies -> "Wreck of the QAnon Navy (revised)"

Original Song Title:

"The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald"

Original Performer:

Gordon Lightfoot

Parody Song Title:

"Wreck of the QAnon Navy (revised)"

Parody Written by:

John Dacey

The Lyrics

Some helpful sorts here commented that an earlier version of this I submitted was too short for a homeric work like the original Eddie Fitz. And so I offer an augmented version that adds a couple of stanzas in length, although the width stays the same and likely has no additional depth.
The legend lives on in hearts of QAnon
Of the big water that they call Lake Travis
The lake, so they say, became choppy that day
MAGA boaters would learn just what sad is.
Loaded with booze, they all went for a cruise
With trump-pence flags a-flying together
They had style and panache 'til their decks were awash
In spite of it being nice weather.

To dumb luck redounds that none of them drowned
'Though to some it appeared they were trying.
Not a single buffoon was with life vest festooned,
Not a one was with mask rules complying.
But everyone there had their cap plus a spare
In the bright red that MAGA supported.
They patrolled the lake marking those in their wake
As as someone who should be deported.

On that ill-fated day Stars 'n Stripes were displayed
But our flag wasn't always respected.
It mostly was there as ill-fitting beachwear
On bodies indulged or neglected.
It was sewn into shorts and bikinis of sorts
That barely contained all the jiggling.
But their cups filled with pride couldn't turn back the tide,
As they sank all that watched them were giggling.

No storm or freak gale had caused them to fail
The damage was all self-inflicted.
But Antifa was named, then Obama was blamed
For the sinkings they should have predicted.
So stifle your laughs at their maritime gaffes,
Let's pretend that we're all quite befuddled
Why people all say we'll remember the day
When the QAnon Navy was scuttled.

Your Vote & Comment Counts

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 1.6
How Funny: 1.6
Overall Rating: 1.6

Total Votes: 27

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   23
 23
 23
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   4
 4
 4
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Michael Pacholek - September 15, 2020 - Report this comment
Anybody who doesn't give this a 5 is probably a QAnon guy, and they can go scuttle themselves.
CML - September 15, 2020 - Report this comment
Ignore those 13 one-bombs, John. That does mean that 13 people are giving you the bird. That is possibly one person downthumbing you 13 times. Some trolls have figured out how to do that ..... I said you should do at least half the song for a legit post, and so you have, so 555
CML - September 15, 2020 - Report this comment
^^^^^^ That does NOT mean 13 people are giving you the bird. Sheesh, this site an edit function
Pichael Macholek - September 15, 2020 - Report this comment
Anyone who gives this a 5 is a delusion-dwelling racist fascist goose-stepper just like AIR's local village idiot Michael Pacholek here.
Michael Pacholek - September 15, 2020 - Report this comment
I got a major boner watching the girls in Cuties twerk and rub their camel toes and fellate their index fingers while doing crotch thrusts. If you think there's something wrong with me, you must be one of those fascist pedophobes voting for Trump.
John Dacey - September 16, 2020 - Report this comment
Thank goodness this site is so carefully curated by its monitors. I'd hate to think of what might result if nutjobs were allowed to run feral here. Many thanks to all who offered (legit) critiques - I'll consider all the 1s as little badges of dishonor that the piece provoked them to such pettiness. So, there's a 'Big Seven'? This makes two down and none to go. Well, maybe Am Pie, Guest - we'll see.
Patrick - September 16, 2020 - Report this comment
Thanks for putting this in readable form. I forgot to ask if this was based on an actual incident. Very funny. Michael Pacholek describes the swimsuits and cavorting, so it appears this tale actually occurred. The other day a first timer launched what I hope is a long run at AIR with a near-flawless "American Pie". You've shown what you can do with "Edmund Fitzgerald", so I'm sure you are up to it, just as soon as the right inspiration lands.

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