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Song Parodies -> "Warming's A Crock!"

Original Song Title:

"I Am A Rock"

Original Performer:

Simon & Garfunkel

Parody Song Title:

"Warming's A Crock!"

Parody Written by:

Patrick McWilliams

The Lyrics

Sometimes winter seems to last forever. This year has been especially rough. If the trend continues...
A winter's day, in late August or September
I am indoors
I hear familiar music, it's getting closer now
The ice cream truck is following a plow

Warming's a crock! We're in an ice age!

Kids build forts, and igloos everlasting
No sun may penetrate
We have no means of driving, the thermal meters fall
Everyone is skiing to the mall

Warming's a crock! This is an ice age!

I burn my books, and my parodies to keep me warm
At last they are good for something
I spied a wooly mammoth, last time I stepped outside
Seems evolution takes all things in stride

Warming's a crock! It's a new Ice Age!

And Barack places blame
And its' still George Bush's fault

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Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 4.3
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

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Michael McVey - February 15, 2011 - Report this comment
Hilarious! And though there's obvious hyperbole, I agree with the premise.
Old Man Ribber - February 15, 2011 - Report this comment
Patrick - Merely fantastic! Great usage of a fine S & G song, wickedly funny. Sending 555 copies to Al Gore. ;D
Michael Pacholek - February 15, 2011 - Report this comment
Pay attention: Global warming is sending the polar icecaps closer to the equator, making for climate change in both directions. Honestly, you conservatives need to remember that men like Buckley wanted you to think.
Patrick - February 15, 2011 - Report this comment
I recall a 1980's novel "A Creed for the Third Millennium" in which the government moved the population of the northern states south for the winter. The premise then was a new ice age. Then the prevailing orthodoxy switched to global warming. Now it's simply called climate change. But whatever you call it, the solution is always to let politicians take more of our money, more of our freedom, and deprive us of proven technologies. Perhaps my bias stems from living in Kansas City, where you can get any kind of weather, any time of the year. The newscasters are saying that the temperature could reach 70° F tomorrow or Thursday. After fighting 10 inch snow falls, that's change I can believe in.
Mark Scotti - February 15, 2011 - Report this comment
Good one, Patrick! It could be worse (see): http://www.amiright.com/parody/60s/therollingstones168.shtml
Old Man Ribber - February 15, 2011 - Report this comment
Patrick - The official government nomenclature is now "Global Climate Disruption". I don't think there is an appointed czar yet, so it falls under the juristiction of Science Czar John Holdren. Check out some of his writings from the 70's, especially those authored with Paul Ehrlich. ;D
Patrick - February 15, 2011 - Report this comment
Czar is a hereditary ruler. There was only one at a time. The correct name for political officials meddling in areas they are unqualified for is "commissar". I keep trying to get our side to use the right name.
Rocket ScienTisT - February 15, 2011 - Report this comment
I think you left out a verse: "Don't talk of love", etc.

The reason for that "Creed" was a latte-70s study by NASA that the Earth was undergoing a period of cooling (despite the gas-guzzling cars of the late 60s-early 70s), and we'd all be freezing by 2000 or 2010.

Note yesterday that global climate change turned a fertile savanna into the Sahara desert, and they didn't even have the Prius then. Even some who do support the warming theory believe that it's just another of those cycles that Man can't really do much about, though of course we shouldn't be polluting anyway. No vote, due to the missing verse, but you're spot on about being an excuse for more Gov power. ... and why does Al Gore fly around in a private jet to preach his message?

Michael Pacholek: Too bad there aren't any liberal leaders who want liberals to think.
Meriadoc - February 16, 2011 - Report this comment
I loved the ice cream truck following the plow! That said, it was almost 60 here in Ohio today. Akron's melting snow alone could probably raise the ocean level. My driveway is finally wide enough for my car again...
Wendy Christopher - February 17, 2011 - Report this comment
Sounds just like the winter we just had here in the UK! And we're all bullied into reducing, reusing and recycling here on an almost daily basis. The silliest things are the signposts put up around the edges of certain towns declaring them 'Low Emission Zones.' Yep, that's right - our government can even control how the air currents move around environmentally-friendly towns.... no matter how many big lorries trundle through them on a daily basis! And some overpaid quango spent actual money putting those things up... *sigh*...!

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