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Song Parodies -> "Seventy Sick Platoons"

Original Song Title:

"Seventy-Six Trombones"

Parody Song Title:

"Seventy Sick Platoons"

Parody Written by:

David Chrenko

The Lyrics

Seventy sick platoons fled to get first aid,
Where a hundred curvaceous nurses helped them mend.
They were followed by rows and rows of our finest GI Joes.
The cream chipped beef had done them in.

Seventy-six bored troops slept beside their guns,
'Til a hundred intense sergeants blew their minds.
There was smoke rising from the trees - giggling infantry.
They had bongs of every shape and kind.

Found an odd bell-bottomed sailor in an old pontoon.
Sail on, Napoleon - Now he's Section 8.
Tin-star armchair generals - like big baboons.
Hoping soon - they'd be back in the states.

There were fifty walkie talkies out of batteries.
Portable toilets were icing in the cold.
Soldier butts of every size - were frozen to them side by side.
Their full agony cannot be told.

Seventy-six Marines who were out on leave,
Had challenged a hundred Fly-Boys in a bar.
There were many more casualties than we dealt the enemy.
And that's how we almost lost the war!

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 1

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   1

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Phil Alexander - November 06, 2003 - Report this comment
Ah, so that's what's really going on in Iraq... very funny :-)
John Jenkins - November 06, 2003 - Report this comment
A lot of good lines - i liked "frozen side to side" best. And I remember the creamed chip beef - SOS!
Adagio - November 06, 2003 - Report this comment
Ahh....the old SOS!
Rick D - November 06, 2003 - Report this comment
You have nothing to fear from the ghost of Allan Sherman.
norman k - November 06, 2003 - Report this comment
I cannot believe someone gave this all ones! This is VERY clever! Great parody!
David Chrenko - November 06, 2003 - Report this comment
Like the rest of you, my main purpose is to share something I've put together and hopefully, give you a laugh. I am curious myself, though, how anyone could objectively give this a "one". Did the butt frozen to the can hit a little too close to home for someone?
Agrimorfee - November 06, 2003 - Report this comment
Funny stuff because it's timeless (unless the military becomes replaced by computers and robots!).
Rick D - November 06, 2003 - Report this comment
Don't worry about it, Dave. Those Robert Preston groupies are everywhere. It was good.
Bob Gomez - November 06, 2003 - Report this comment
Very nice work, David, and a fitting addition to the tradition of military parodies. My dad was in WWII and he used to sing us a song about Spam when we were on family vacations. There's nothing quite like the dark sense of humor that comes out of the war experience. Kudos. d;:^)
Phil Alexander - November 06, 2003 - Report this comment
I wouldn't worry about the occasional 1s, David - at one point a few months ago, there was a bod whose sole raison d'etre seemed to be to get the first vote on any parody with all 1s. There's even a few parodies written about it.
Johnny D - November 06, 2003 - Report this comment
Great work, David --- just write your stuff, post it, and have fun --- don't sweat the votes, dude. It's always good to enable the commentary option - people's written comments mean so much more than anonymous votes anyway. Keep up the good work.
Michael Pacholek - November 06, 2003 - Report this comment
Glad to see someone else here knows who Allan Sherman was. "Al 'n' Yetta always sit togetta, watching TV every single night..."
David Chrenko - November 06, 2003 - Report this comment
Yeah Michael, I grew up in North Jersey on a steady diet of stuff like My Son the Folksinger, Myron Cohen, Stan Freberg, and Jean Shepherd. All these guys were great storytellers.
Rick D - November 07, 2003 - Report this comment
Do not make a stingy sandwich, pile the cold cuts high----Customers should see salami-comin' thru the rye
Guy - November 07, 2003 - Report this comment
Great parody. I can really appreciate this since I spent a few years in the military myself. Nice work.

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