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Song Parodies -> "Republicans Favorite Schemes"

Original Song Title:

"My Favorite Things"

Original Performer:

Julie Andrews

Parody Song Title:

"Republicans Favorite Schemes"

Parody Written by:

Jeff in Richmond VA

The Lyrics

This was an easy parody....the GOP crooks are quite generous with material for ridicule!
Voter supression in North Carolina
Ultrasound probes stuck up in her vagina
Cutting your food stamps is heartless and mean
These are Republicans' favorite schemes

Blocking appointments of Federal judges
Keeping the Congress from passing a budget
Tax cuts for Wall Street while we get more fees
These are Republicans' favorite schemes

Hannity, Glenn Beck, O'Reilly and Limbaugh
Palin and Bachmann, those two crazy bimbos
Lie after lie they distort everything
These are Republicans' favorite schemes

Hear the sound bytes of the right-wing
The GOP looks pretty sad....
I start to remember Republican schemes
and then I get real------ly mad!

Closing the clinics that sponsor abortion
Letting the banks get away with extortion
Rigging elections thru gerrymandering
These are Republicans' favorite schemes

Boehner & Cantor won't pass immigration
Then they take off on a 3 week vacation
They filibuster most everything
These are Republicans' favorite schemes

Shutting the government down cost us billions;
Trying to take away health care for millions
Helping the rich is their ongoing theme
Some people fall for Republican schemes

Hear the sound bytes of the right-wing
The GOP looks really bad
If we keep on hearing the Republican schemes
We all should get real------ly mad!!

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 2.2
How Funny: 1.9
Overall Rating: 2.1

Total Votes: 13

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   9
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   4

User Comments

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Ffej - December 13, 2013 - Report this comment
I understand that it's a condition prevalent in liberals and sign language interpreters that psychotic episodes associated with schizophrenia find themselves unable to coherently express words and ideas due to chronic bouts of hallucinations, still, no pass for you, 1s all around.
Barry J. Mitchel - December 13, 2013 - Report this comment
Good pacing, at least. "Very interesting, but not very funny" said Artie Johnson. But I'm not "Laugh-in."
Red Elf - December 13, 2013 - Report this comment
Yes, Santa, there IS a Va! There lives a naughty man named Jeff who blames his plight in life on the Right. Get the coal truck ready for another delivery this year. Guy's got a coal factory and yet still complains because it's not 'clean coal' ;-))
Jeff in Richmond - December 13, 2013 - Report this comment
The low scores I wear like a badge of honor! It means I PISSED OFF some crooked Republicans!!! :)
A Republican pissed of by Jeff - December 13, 2013 - Report this comment
As long as you feel that way, Jeff, here's one more. Don't say I never did anything for you
Beverly Bandler - December 13, 2013 - Report this comment
As NPR’s homespun humorist Garrison Keillor reflected in 2004, “Once upon a time, reasonable people could vote for Republicans, like Eisenhower. Not now: The party of Lincoln and Liberty was transmogrified into the party of hairy-backed swamp developers and corporate shills, faith-based economists, fundamentalist bullies with Bibles, Christians of convenience, freelance racists, misanthropic frat boys, shrieking midgets of AM radio, tax cheats, nihilists in golf pants…”
American political scientist Andrew Hacker traces the origins of the extremist Republican Party that we know today to 1946. In that year, he notes the GOP decided to sell itself “as the voice of ordinary Americans” to voters who were resentful of postwar rising prices and shortages. With the 1946 midterm elections, in the middle of Democrat Harry Truman’s first term as president, “swept in were figures like Richard Nixon and Joseph McCarthy,” each one notorious in his own way.
Nixon’s shabby “smear campaign” treatment of Democrat Helen Gahagan Douglas firmly established him as a ruthless political “slime ball” of the first order. McCarthy gave us “McCarthyism” (using a Red Scare to destroy the careers of many left-wing dissidents and progressives from 1950 to 1956), one of the most shameful periods in American history. McCarthy, Hacker notes, “created the epithet ‘un-American,’ an accusation almost impossible to refute. Since then, the party has exhibited a coarse strain, which its corporate wing tolerates as a price of prevailing.”
The real disintegration (what blogger John Rogers calls the “crazification factor”) of what used to be called the “Grand Old Party” began with the 1964 and 1965 civil rights legislation. From that period, the GOP – once known for urging “caution and prudence” in blending reform with traditional values – evolved steadily into a party with a free-floating relationship with reality. The process was accelerated by the rise of Ronald Reagan, an actor and corporate pitchman who himself had only a passing relationship with facts.
Now, the Republican Party is under the thumb of uninformed and irrational Tea Party extortionists — a coalition including extremist Ayn Rand capitalists, Christian fundamentalists who reject America’s tradition of religious tolerance, and neo-Confederates who want to return to the discredited constitutional theories promulgated by slave owners in the pre-Civil War South. These disparate groups have come together to reject the New Deal principles of a social compact in which the federal government plays an important role in promoting the “general Welfare,” as spelled out in the U.S. Constitution.
Indeed, the Republican Party is now controlled by right-wing extremists who attack the expressed wording of the U.S. Constitution (while pretending to love the Constitution), and – beyond that – they are contemptuous of any rational governance at any level.
The GOP has evolved into a political party unlike any the United States has experienced, at least not since the Southern Democrats in 1860 seceded from the Union to protect the institution of slavery. Like those Confederates, the Tea Partiers are attacking core principles of democracy and, in effect, the Republic itself.
Over the past several decades, these right-wing Republicans have been moving “to replace our representative democracy with a politically and economically authoritarian system,” according to American cultural critic Henry A. Giroux. The Republicans, he writes, “swath their unabashed greed and self importance with distorted ‘freedom’ and ‘free market’ rhetoric, unbridled and unaccountable.”
In this process, nearly all the traditional GOP moderates have been purged, reflecting a form of ideological purity and moral certainty that is more commonly associated with authoritarian systems, not major parties in a pluralistic democracy. Respected moderates and progressives in the past like Robert M. La Follette Sr. (Wisconsin), Jeannette Rankin (Montana), Margaret Chase Smith (Maine) and Charles McC. Mathias (Maryland) would not stand a chance in today’s radicalized Republican Party.
Republicans are no longer a loyal opposition to the majority Democrats (who won not only the presidency and the Senate in 2012 but prevailed by about 1½ million votes for the House of Representatives, with the GOP’s House “majority” sustained largely through anti-democratic gerrymandering). Today’s Republican Party has become more of an anti-democratic insurrectionary cult that disdains the will of the majority and considers governance itself a form of evil. Through this transformation, the Republicans have helped replace the American Dream with a paralyzing Nightmare that may be very difficult to end, but ended it must be.
2LD4U - December 13, 2013 - Report this comment
I need help. I am a slutty liberal woman that is madly in love with Dennis Miller and Bill O'Reilly. But, I know in my heart that I am a liberal. I guess I need to see a shink. No?
Dave W. - December 13, 2013 - Report this comment
A little tit for tat ...that's fair,Jeff... Express yourself all you want...then, turn yourself around..that's what it's all about......Beverly - take a few long deep breaths, the shaking will subside and you can get back to your yoga
Tim Rice - December 13, 2013 - Report this comment
Dave W. and 2LD4U obviously have nothing to say. Yet they say it, providing clutter and behaving like fools.
Actual Patriot - December 13, 2013 - Report this comment
Commie Chaff from the Confederate Capital wants to filibuster the rest of us with a lot of crap about how the party of Jeff Davis, John Calhoun, the KKK, the Black Panthers, La Raza, and Hussein is the patriotic non-racist party! Say hi to Martin Bashir and Cindy Sheehan on your way to irrelevancy, leftard.
??? - December 13, 2013 - Report this comment
Where is Lennie when you need him? Someone needs to deal with this rambling, ranting Socialist Leftist trash and right now! SuperLen where are you??? Set 'em straight!
Original Actual Patriot - December 14, 2013 - Report this comment
This nest of obscene, seething, vicious vipers has confirmed everything Beverly Bandler wrote. Jeff, please never try to dignify this site with your talent again. It is incapable of dignity.
Genuine Original Actual Patriot - December 14, 2013 - Report this comment
But Barry, according to an "info-parody" writer here, parodies don't have to be funny. Who should I believe -- you or him? I have to believe him because he has many more submissions than you.

And that happens to be "Arte" Johnson.
Rob Arndt - December 14, 2013 - Report this comment
Jeff, you are 100% right as most parodies here on a daily basis are just based on news events. Hardcore political parodies are definately not funny with the pitched verbal battles that go one forever over ideological stances. 555 for the parody!
Boris - December 14, 2013 - Report this comment
The DNC's circus chimp continues to dance, but ceases to amuse. 111 for the chimp.
Eduardo Porter - December 14, 2013 - Report this comment
The Republicans hate Obamacare because they're terrified that Americans are going to like it.

Specifically, they're terrified that some of the tens of millions of Americans who will have greater access to health insurance under Obamacare will realize that the new law is actually not going to destroy the country — that, in fact, it is going to improve life for tens of millions of Americans, including, importantly, many who vote Republican.

Many of the Americans who will benefit from Obamacare are relatively poor red-state Republicans who are currently devout supporters of the Republican Party. For decades, the Republican pitch to these voters has been that "less government is better." If Obamacare works the way it is supposed to, however, it's possible that "more government" might actually seem to be better — and that many die-hard Republican voters might realize that.

After all, even now, before Obamacare has really gotten going, Americans actually very much like the specific benefits of Obamacare — as long as you don't call it "Obamacare."

When Americans are asked whether they like "Obamacare," a majority say no. But when Americans are asked whether they support what Obamacare actually does, they love it:

Here are figures from Kaiser's March 2013 poll:

Tax credits for small businesses to buy insurance: 88% in favor.

Closing the Medicare drug benefit doughnut hole: 81% in favor.

Extension of dependent coverage to offspring up to age 26: 76% in favor.

Expanding Medicaid: 71% in favor.

Ban on exclusions for preexisting conditions: 66% in favor.

Employer mandate: 57% in favor.

What Americans don't like is the "individual mandate," which forces them to buy health insurance. This is understandable — no one likes to be forced to do anything. And it's true that this provision is probably what gives the Republicans their most persuasive firepower in attacking the law. But the big reason the "individual mandate" is in there is that all the other benefits would be entirely unaffordable without it.

If more Americans end up liking Obamacare, including some Americans who have bought into the "less government is better" pitch, this would be bad news for the already increasingly marginalized Republican Party.

So that's certainly why the Republicans hate Obamacare so much — because they're worried that their constituents are actually going to like it.

But throwing away old positions and embracing new ones is a big part of politics. So maybe the Republicans should stop fighting "Obamacare" and just call it "Cruz-care."
Raymond Freeman - December 14, 2013 - Report this comment
The 10 poorest states all voted Republican in 2012. Why do poor people vote against their own economic interests? One obvious reason is Republican lying. Republicans also use “framing” to manipulate them.

Liberals assume that political thinking consists of classical logic about economic self-interest, using neutral language. So if one presents the facts, people will reach the right conclusion. This does not happen. Most political thought is unconscious.

Conservative communicators know this, having studied marketing. Emotions are involved. People think in terms of metaphors, images and narratives, such as “sound bites.” Framing is like the viewfinder of a camera, helping to focus on issues. Notably, facts outside their frames are rejected.

Framing is the process of selective influence over the individual’s perception of the meanings attributed to words. It is a propaganda technique. Political framing uses morally based arguments, fears, emotionally based language, repetition and rejection of the opposition’s frames. “Climate change” seems less scary than “global warming.”

Wasting money is “wrong.” Hence, conservatives have framed all taxation as money taken out of decent taxpayers’ pockets by evil “big government” and wasted on “welfare queens,” implying that all taxes are wasted.

The Affordable Care Act has provisions that most Americans like. Conservatives never attacked them directly. They changed the framing from economic to social, using misdirection as a magician does to get a gut reaction. They repeated the slogans “government takeover” and “death panels” endlessly. It worked like magic. Less than half of Americans supported “Obamacare.” But when polled, around 70 percent supported its actual provisions, as mentioned in a previous comment. Logical argument was pushed aside by emotional “hot buttons.”

“Obamacare” cut $716 billion from Medicare intended for extra corporate subsidies. In Obama’s frame, this cut out “waste” and was thus good. Romney framed this as “taking $716 billion out of Medicare” and thus bad, insofar as funding for a popular program was cut. The same number became two different “facts,” depending on framing.

The impact on the body politic is perverse. The peasants vote for the interests of the aristocracy.

America is a frightened country. It has lost its confidence. China may soon become No. 1. The white population will soon be a minority. Republicans are experts at appealing to nostalgia for a simpler past. Simple folks feel more comfortable voting for simple candidates, such as Sarah Palin. They believed she “understood” them and rejected attempts to point out her ignorance. Tea Party candidates are proud of their ignorance and appeal directly to ignorant voters.

Thomas Frank found in his book What’s the Matter with Kansas? that simple folks in Kansas treated politics as having no connection with economic affairs. They feel victimized by “liberal elites” who destroy simple old-fashioned values. They feel they are in a world over which they have no control. Their overriding interest is not economic. It is security. So they vote for Republicans, who frame themselves as the ones to bring back the good old days.

Yet Republicans have done the most to destroy the good old days. Productivity has soared but wages have stagnated for 30 years due to Republican policies. These policies have sent jobs abroad to increase profits. America’s economy is not run for everyone’s benefit. It is run for the benefit of today’s plutocrats. Attempts to point this out are framed as “class warfare,” with Democrats as “socialists” wanting to make America into a new Soviet Russia, making the poor even poorer. Are you aware of any rebuttal to this?

Republicans frame today’s Gilded Age barons as “job creators,” warning that taxing them more would increase unemployment. This is entirely false. Shortly before the 2012 election, the Congressional Research Service joined a large group of economists and found no relationship between upper-income tax rates and economic growth. Republicans had the report suppressed. Are you aware of any furor over this?

America is the country of that old-time religion. Almost half of the population believes the Bible is literally true. They will vote for someone professing the same belief. Voting for a candidate against abortion is logical if someone religious believes abortion is murder. Republicans are brilliant at tapping into cultural “wedge issues”: gay rights, abortion, race, immigration, guns, “family values,” etc. Poor people may care more about these than about their financial self-interest. This is not irrational: it is a function of what is more important to a given individual — moral issues or financial issues.
Dave W. - December 15, 2013 - Report this comment
Hey..Tim Rice...Get another life ..It's obvious You don't quite get this one...The whole darned place is specifically designed for this crap...duhh You're playing the fool and cluttering up space like they want you to...Hey, wait a minute , you Do get it.....Nevermind
Jeff in Richmond VA - December 15, 2013 - Report this comment
Cheers to those who left the above comments blasting the greedy rich Plutocrats. We are on our way to becoming a corporate oligarchy. This happened in Germany 1933, except that, instead of violence the "Nazi Republicans" are using corporate money to take over the country. But the GOP propoganda machine (Fox News, Limbaugh, Glenn Beck) is the same vicious hateful caliber of Joseph Goebbels. Instead of blaming the Jews, today they blame the poor and minorities for the country's ills...when in reality it is the corruption & greed of the Republicans that is destroying the fiber of our country. Parodies like mine that instill anger and hatred from the right are like crucifixes held up to Dracula. The truth is like poison to them! GOP = Greedy Oil Profiteers GOP = Grease Our Palms GOP = Getting Obama Pissed 1.3 million long-term unemployed Americans will go without unemployment insurance on Dec. 28th......meanwhile Exxon Mobil and friends are getting hundreds of billions in tax subsidies while making obscene profits. And some mega-corporations pay NO INCOME TAX......but I'm sure all this is just peach to all you right-wing greedy racist greedy hateful greedy selfish greedy spiteful self-centered (did I say greedy?) Republicans. Funny thing....the GOP has given me enough material to write over 95 parodies.
Tim Rice - December 15, 2013 - Report this comment
You're right, Dave W. My bad. I've wondered why nut cases hover around here like flies around dog poo. What an asylum! The place is dominated by the chorus line of Springtime for Hitler, crypto-racists, rightards, Harold Stassen voters, gunsels, flag wavers, nihilists, Fox News zombies, nativists, reactionaries, corporations who think they are people, illiterates, holy rollers, voter suppressors, union busters, creationists, war mongers, porn addicts, mugs, pugs, thugs, nitwits, halfwits, dimwits, vipers, snipers, con men, buggerers, bushwhackers, hornswogglers, cannibals, and vampires. "They" must think it brings in the advertising.
Sane Man - December 16, 2013 - Report this comment
You're full of it, leftards. You talentless nutjobs can't face the fact that Communism is already a total failure and so is your 0-Care. You all belong in padded cells! This place is dominated by Goebbels wannabes, blatant racists, empty-headed leftards, Martin Bashir watchers, eunuch sissies, flag-burning traitors, fascists, raving PMSNBC lunatics, worshipers of the Kenyan usurper illegally occupying the White House, meddlesome bureaucrats, welfare queens, total illiterates, hate-mongers, treasonous vote-fraud-promoters and New Black Panther devotees, anti-right-to-work-law union parasites, raving eco-wacko Al Gore cultists, war mongers, queer porn addicts, mugs, pugs, thugs, stuffed suits, empty suits, empty heads, empty noisemakers, mafia morons, dog-fellators, nutsuckers, greentards, parasites, and blood-sucking lawyers. "They" are right about one thing, as ol' Kevin Pierson just demonstrated: Second Amendment rights clearly don't apply to leftards, since they're all treasonous criminally insane psychopaths and the violent eliminationist rhetoric of their fat cat Congress-whores like Nazi Piglosi may drive them into a mass-murdering rage and send them on a killing spree against patriotic Americans at any moment! No leftard should be allowed access to anything more dangerous than a butter knife. In Jeff's case, we'd better not let him have the butter knife either; 0-Care won't pay for removal of foreign objects he's rammed up his rectum, and he's not properly signed up for it yet anyway.
Kevin Piers' Gay Lover - December 16, 2013 - Report this comment
You know, when commie losers start projecting their crimes onto their enemies the way Jeff is doing here, I keep wishing half of their accusations were true. For instance, Republicans definitely need to suppress dead, felonious, and foreign votes a lot harder; no Democrat-appointed judge has ever been worthy of the bench, and while the ACA is failing pretty epically on its own already, forcing it back on all the hypocritical Democrat Fat Cats who insist on exempting themselves from its provisions while imposing it on the rest of the nation would cause it to fall apart even faster.
Lie of the Year, 2013 - December 16, 2013 - Report this comment
"If you like your insurance plan you can keep it.”
Jeff in R. VA - December 21, 2013 - Report this comment
"When in Rome, do as the Romanians do." "Fool me once, shame on you....fool me twice, won't get fooled again!" HURRICANE KATRINA.......IRAQ.......WMDs......OSAMA BIN LADEN MISSING.....AFGHANISTAN.....WALL STREET MELTDOWN......SCOOTER LIBBY SCANDAL.....DICK CHENEY......WATERBOARDING TORTURE.......AND MORE CRAP THAT I CAN'T REMEMBER RIGHT NOW...... YESSIREE, George W. Bush was the greatest President we ever had........
To Jeff, with Love - December 21, 2013 - Report this comment
Jeff in Richmond - December 24, 2013 - Report this comment
I believe the Wall St. bailout, the Do-Nothing Congress, the loss of AAA Credit, Threat of Default, were all Republican tricks
Tim Rice - December 24, 2013 - Report this comment
Jeff, it's Christmas Eve. Let it go. I'm solidly on your side. We may be bright and in the right, but this is the wrong site on which to fight. You can see from the above that you're up against a vicious horde. I hope you're not alone tonight and tomorrow, especially. It can happen to an adherent of any ideology. Peace, brother.
Administrative Audience - December 26, 2013 - Report this comment
Obama the magician will now perform his next act- pulling real change out of a hat. Oops, it's 2016 and we're $24,000,000,000,000 in debt. Show's over. Obama- exit stage Left-of Left!!! Bring on Christie, it's time for the Fat man to sing. America is over :(

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