Hey
Don't write yourself off, Chet
It's only in your head you feel so small just like an elf
Just try your best
Mix everything you can
And don't you worry if the cheap booze sells and not top shelf

It just takes some lime
Little bit o' tabasco or paprika
Yer bloody mary bloody mary will be just fine
Yer bloody mary bloody mary will be all right, all right

Wait, ignore what I've just said
Some people don't like their drinks that way, they're picky as sin
Don't quit just now
You're like Sam from "cheers"
Keep on serving us some lager beers and tanqueray gin

It just takes some lime
Little bit o' campari or club soda
Everything everything will taste like shite
Everything everything will taste like shite like shite

Hey, don't throw the towel in yet
It's only in your head your bartending skills could use some work
Just use a bit less of that dry vermouth
For martinis and oh, by the way don't be a jerk

It just takes some lime
Little bit o' coca cola or tonic water
Every drink every drink will be just fine
Every drink every drink will be all right, all right

It just takes some charm
Little bit o' funny jokes once in a while
Every tip every tip will be just fine
Every tip every tip will be all right, all right