[acoustic guitar intro]

Moose and Squirrel drive me eensane
make me holler; now I'm sad
I am taking theese real hard
weeth Natasha I am mad

Een theese song I weel moan
I feel deessed and so I groan
They are driving me eensane
I must say eets so

Theenk my plot ees working fine
Eet all looks ready and set to go
But then suddenly I glance
See that squirrel; I say “No”
Everytheeng was lookeeng good
Eet would work and I would laugh
See that squirrel fly and deescend
I am screwed; hee'll keeck my ass

[instrumental break]

Man, theese bites; now I am sore
see that steenkeeng squirrel; I whine
Hear Natasha say, “Not now
we are focked”, I hear her cry
Swear and moan about it all
I am glum; hate these guys
Squirrel and Moose; there go my hopes
I am screwed; weel be confined

I'm depressed; I feel so down
Theese does not look so good to me
Eef we fail I weel be found
een Si-beer-ya; won't be free
Weel be jailed een that place
Een the “Can” I'll remain
Somehow eet turns out that way
All my plans go down the drain

“Damn, theese sucks”, I complain
these guys mess weeth my brain
So I seeng theese sad refrain
'cause een jail I weel be stayeeng