Well, I spent several years in psychotherapy
To try to beat a fetish twisted as can be.
No matter how I tried, I could not keep
Myself from fantasizing about female sheep.
It's twisted but it's true
I only want to be with ewes

I got a wild and wooly shear sheep thrill untold
Each and every time my ram entered the fold.
Till I found myself in a legal jam.
It seems there's no such thing as "silence of the lambs".
Got fired from the petting zoo.
Cuz I got caught being with ewes.

Some high official at the ASPCA
Said we'll let you go free if you vow to mend your ways.

Well that was something easier to say than do.
I woke up every morning feeling sad and blue.
I convinced myself 'twould do no harm
To take a little walk past Old MacDonalds farm.
The man was not amused
When he caught me being with ewes.
My arrest made headline news.
And now I cannot be with ewes.