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Song Parodies -> "Carry-On"

Original Song Title:

"Carry Out"

Parody Song Title:

"Carry-On"

Parody Written by:

Jeff Reuben

The Lyrics

Don't know the OS? Listen/watch it here: Carry Out Video
Airport: I'm taking no crap
Flip off attendants outside at the sky cap
Not gonna check luggage, for my trip to Italy
They'd end up in Sudan, or in the Bering Sea

Got my bag, headed through security
It's a good thing I got here six hours early
So with a huff, put my stuff through the x-ray
Then the guard told me what he would take a-way

Took my knives, sheers, beers, wine, ski poles, sex toys
And my pet rat, sword, bat
Won't fly with the TSA boys

Let me find my license, baby, while I wait in line
Check the boarding pass to see the seat I've been assigned
Just want to get on to the airplane
But they told me of a fee that I did not pay

Check it

Thought I'd save a little money with my
Carry-on
Did not pack a bulky suitcase just a
Carry-on
Used my gross, old gym bag for my
Carry-on
Should have washed my bag before I
Brought it on

Why the hell they gonna charge me for my
Carry-on
It took time to stuff my whole life in this
Carry-on
I asked why, they didn't want to
Hear it boy
So I paid, they told me "That's the
'Spirit'" boy

Anyone, else think it's kind of strange
That the in-flight movie is Snakes On A Plane
Now of course you know I see the 'Fasten Seatbelt' sign
You see I hope that you can help me out with mine

Baby there's no need for you to be rude
Please just answer don't give me no altitude
Getting hungry, can you feed me
And can you bring a pillow and blankee?

I want nuts, chips, drinks, coins for the potty
And if I get airsick
I'd like to buy a vomit bag

When the stewardess comes, Imma make my move
Cause I think she's hot and she likes to groove
And now she's giving me the eye I think she's into me
But to join Club Mile High, she will charge a fee

Sold!

Must be policy to charge me for my
Carry-on
Wish I'd shut up but I think I'm gonna
Carry-on
Shouldn't pack, my razor in my
Carry-on
Shouldn't pack, no lasers in my
Carry-on

Still I can't believe they charged me for my
Carry-on
They have height and weight restrictions on my
Carry-on
Shouldn't pack, no ice cream in my
Carry-on
Cause they won't, help me clean out my
Carry-on

"What's your name?
Where's your passport?
Did someone ask
You to take stuff for them?"

Open flame
A six-pack of beer
I know it's lame
You can't take that on here

Your luggage may (What's your name?)
Have shifted (Pull my finger)
Please be careful (Please don't stuff me)
When you unload it (In the overhead bin)

Seats upright (Approaching)
In locked position (Our final descent)
Put up your trays (We're glad you flew)
In good condition (With us, please come again)

Thought I'd save a little money with my
Carry-on
Did not pack a bulky suitcase just a
Carry-on
Used my gross, old gym bag for my
Carry-on
Should have washed my bag before I
Brought it on

Why the hell they gonna charge me for my
Carry-on
It took time to stuff my whole life in this
Carry-on
I asked why, they didn't want to
Hear it
So I paid, they told me "That's the
'Spirit'"

Please don't kick me off!

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 LittleLots
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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 4.9
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 15

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 1
 1
 
 5   15
 14
 14
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Mark Scotti - April 30, 2010 - Report this comment
No 'flight risk" here to give you kudos on flight 555!!!
Matthias - April 30, 2010 - Report this comment
High flying fun!
LilAproness - April 30, 2010 - Report this comment
the Big Question is . . . did you pack your Apron, Lord Jeffry, Duke 0Toga ? ? it will come in handy over there for sure in Italia . . . when in Rome do as those roamin' Romans do ! Toga`~ Toga !
Phil N - April 30, 2010 - Report this comment
Yeah, ridiculous stuff, no fun on such airlines. Even the fees on the major airliners are ridiculous. But this parody was fun, well written
The Charnstar - April 30, 2010 - Report this comment
HA! Oh my, I love Airplane parodies! Turning pain into pleasure. 555
Matthias - May 10, 2010 - Report this comment
At least you weren't flying on the Airline to Dayton! Well done, On a song that I never heard before, and quite frankly don't want to hear again... Not a fan honestly, never really liked Timbaland.
Mark Scotti - May 14, 2010 - Report this comment
(SOTM) LOVED taking flight 555 one more time!
Below Average Dave - May 15, 2010 - Report this comment
Tough os, the original song was very different, have mixed opinions on it, but you were great as always. . .for some reason Justin Timberlake saying "Want it Your Way" made me want Burger King. . .anyway great job
Warren Baker - May 25, 2010 - Report this comment
(SOTM)Loved the storyline, but the rhythms seemed little off compared to the OS. And I really like the different phrases that preceded the Carry On chorus. Definitely fun.
bobpiecheese - May 27, 2010 - Report this comment
(SOTM) A few pacing quibbles, but with the OS that's understandable. I don't want to know why you're trying to pack a laser. Airline parodies are always good for a chuckle. 555 for you!
Peter Andersson - May 28, 2010 - Report this comment
SOTM April 2010 - My comment has been placed on the forum voting thread:
http://www.inthe00s.com/index.php?topic=40536.0
Matthias - February 16, 2013 - Report this comment
See above, Twice... I love traveling parodies and traveling in general and this is one of my favorites (even though you have so many good ones)
Max Power - February 16, 2013 - Report this comment
The airline service are just like the ones you get from public transportations from MTA, really bad. It really tells you something.
Rex - February 17, 2013 - Report this comment
I know what you mean -- I tried to take my wife in my carry-on and they said no. Completely unreasonable if you ask me. Excellent concept and many LOL lines.
Agrimorfee - February 18, 2013 - Report this comment
I see the pacing quibble in how you forced the "Seats in the upright position" lines, but I can totally live with that for the joke inherent in it. Meanwhile, Wow,so many good lines, and covering so much about the topic. I wish I had more personal time to follow the SOTMs to read good stuff like this.
Max Power - June 27, 2015 - Report this comment
Carry on, you already got it ;)
Blaydeman - June 30, 2015 - Report this comment
(Artistry) Yeah, this is awesome. I know I've read this before, but apparently I never commented on it. But yes, this is amazingly funny and perfectly executed. If there ever was a pacing slip, it was never super noticeable and nearly every line was funny. Just, wow. 555
Agrimorfee - June 30, 2015 - Report this comment
How much impact Timbaland has on my life is congruent to me forgetting this entire song and parody from 5 years ago.Time hasn't faded the humor in this flight of fancy.
bobpiecheese - June 30, 2015 - Report this comment
(Artistry) At this point I don't think there's anything I can say that hasn't been said already. Absolutely timeless parody (until they invent teleporters, I guess), 555 for all time!
Abbott Skelding - June 30, 2015 - Report this comment
Overall not bad...you basically covered every aspect of flying and airports. Nice piece of aviation spoofery

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