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Song Parodies -> "Smoking!"

Original Song Title:

"What Is This Feeling?"

Original Performer:

Wicked: The Musical

Parody Song Title:

"Smoking!"

The Lyrics

[spoken]
GALYMPHOMA:
I rest here in the glummest of hospitals.

EMPHYSEMA:
With throat cancer.

[music starts]
BOTH:
I had the illusion that smoking was the ish.

EMPHYSEMA:
But of course, I learned a lesson.

GALYMPHOMA:
Now I'm hoarse and tired of huffin'.

BOTH:
For I smoked a pack a day to look s*** hot.

Now I need a blood transfusion.
And this voice-box is a bitch!

GALYMPHOMA:
At-least-I'm-still-exceedingly-popular-in-cowboy-leather
With-hotties-all-by-my-siiide...

EMPHYSEMA:
...not.

[iron-lung instrumental]

GALYMPHOMA:
My tongue is peeling,
It's bloody and blue.

EMPHYSEMA:
I spit black foam up,
It tastes just like spew.

GALYMPHOMA:
My mouth is yucky.

EMPHYSEMA:
My teeth are greening.

GALYMPHOMA:
They taste disgusting.

BOTH:
My gums are bleeding!
Pharynx is decayin'.
Smoked like a gas main.

YECCCCHHH!!!

Smoking!
Bloody hell I hate it, smoking!

GALYMPHOMA:
What disgrace!

EMPHYSEMA:
It's gross!

GALYMPHOMA:
I'm choking!

BOTH:
Twelve a day?
Let's smoke some more!

Every single day I draw and draw
My eyes start to itch, my throat gets sore
From stinkin' rotten smoking.

Such a dangerous inhalation!
Causing throat disintegration!
Immature and wrong!

Oh, I'll try to quit... then raid through trash,
Searching for a butt to lick the ash!
All because of smoking tobacco,
I've spoiled... my... lungs!

TOBACCO COMPANIES:
Our cylinders of tar taste so good!
You can't get cancer lighting sticks of soot!
That's an error! Utter garbage! We-don't-mean-to-sound-all-pious,
But our products won't cause carnage!

GALYMPHOMA:
You...wea...sels...are...stin...king...li...ars!

TOBACCO COMPANIES:
Though a million users have died.
It's something execs must have denied.
We just want to sell our menthol lites worldwiiide!

So we're all...

BOTH:
Smoking!

Gutteral speaking, my blood strains to flow!
(Tar gets caked on haemoglobins!)
You smell this odour? They give me BO!
(Throat now smoulders. Great, I'm croaking!)
My pulse starts rushing, my head starts reeling!
(Man, it tastes like gross manure!)
Oh, I know this feeling! Buzz from nicotine!

Movie scripts get payed... making smokes looks fresh?
Damned haute couture!

TOBACCO COMPANIES:
Yeeesss!

BOTH:
Noooooo!

Smoking!

Fingers stained, so they look Asian!
Artificial respiration?
My poor old lungs!

Oh, I tried to quit... but wait, alas!
Now I am addicted to the patch!
How silly...

ALL:
Smoking! (Smoking's awful? Never!)
Smoking! (Smoking!)
It aint cheap, see! (Smoking!)
Coughing goo! (So?)

Wide holes in luuungs!

Smoking!
Need to stay away from smoking!

[proffers a carton of cigarettes]
EMPHYSEMA:
Smoke?

GALYMPHOMA:
AARGH!

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 LittleLots
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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 21

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 1
 
 3   3
 1
 1
 
 4   2
 4
 4
 
 5   16
 16
 15
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Tommy Turtle - April 07, 2006 - Report this comment
JARLB, nice ta see ya again! (Many, many femmy-nany rhymes in TT stuff since ya were here last.)..... TTTBF (too true to be funny). DKTOS, but do have a colleague who just went through that - throat cancer - laryngectomy and all. Doing well now, voice is sorta back... but gutsy truths here. I'll trust you on the pacing and give 5 cancer sticks.
Luke Brattoni - April 10, 2006 - Report this comment
If you start the audio where I have [music starts], it's pretty easy to follow... the instrumental break should orientate you into the pacing of the following lines. Anyway, thanks for peepin'!
Chris Bodily TM - May 04, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) DKTOS, and it was too hard to follow with the audio. But you had some funny lyrics., though. 344
Agrimorfee - May 05, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) I can't follow this MIDI either...I trust your pacing...excellent wordage as usual.
Laura K - May 10, 2006 - Report this comment
This was cool, I sang it in my head, I had a few hangups but they were bery minor, ^ ^ I've had "Loathing" stuck in my head all day so I had no trouble following it! I have to say, good job with the tobacco companies! Very good!
Cat - May 10, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Couldn't really follow the MIDI, but this was really cool and creative. And true!
Rex - May 11, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) This parody is smokin'! "Cylinders of tar", heh heh. Very well written.
Scathe - May 11, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) This is a graphic parody of the dangers of smoking. It's also a good sucker punch at the tobacco companies.
Matthias - May 12, 2006 - Report this comment
The Marablo Man gets kicked in the balls
Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd - May 17, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) *Holds up fired up lighter*
bobpiecheese - May 18, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) It's true. On the negative side, it's not a good idea to parody a song from a musical and providing a half-second mp3. On the positive side, you tackled the issue of smoking. Nice work, Luke.
Max Power - May 20, 2006 - Report this comment
SOTM-Alright
Rick C - May 24, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Well-written but funny. 555
Red Ant - May 28, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTm) I know I read and commented on this before; must have been on the duplicate you deleted. Anywoo, nice work, and duelling cancers for vocals is one of the more bizarre ideas I've seen.
Johnny D - May 28, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Puff The Magic Dragon would approve!
Phil Alexander - May 29, 2006 - Report this comment
Found it hard to follow on the mp3 (basically, I got lost right away) - it's always a problem with midi, I've found (unless you know the song to start with). But you had me at the character names :-)
Stuart McArthur - May 30, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) yes, the character names...something about a prolonged dialogue between Gali and someone called Emi, and Asian fingers, reminds me of something else - stay out there, Luke, wombat dude - 555
Larry Hensley - May 31, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Very fascinating and interesting, fives
Arwen - May 31, 2006 - Report this comment
SOTM...you know, I've never needed anyone to talk me out of picking up the smoking habit...but if I ever do, I'm going to remember this parody. Nice PSA, Luke...

...Oh, and, for the record, "And this voice-box is a bitch!" made me dribble my morning OJ down my chin...hee! =)
wannabemustangjockey - May 31, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) This is interesting... and I'm not just blowing smoke either.
Do I Know You? - August 10, 2007 - Report this comment
LOL!!!! i LOVE this...but of corse i don't smoke. keep up the good work.
Wicked Green Queen - September 23, 2007 - Report this comment
I loved your song. This was the first song I ever sang on this site. P.S. If anyone ever sees any of my aongs on here... check 'em out.
Heaven's Lil Devil - January 27, 2008 - Report this comment
I loved it. I have NEVER had the urge to smoke, and this will most definately stop any urge I ever get. In an entertaining way. Byt the way, chenck out Green Queens latest parody in the Grease (musicla) section. It is about Idina!

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