Song Parodies -> Switching Churches
| Original Song Title: | "Somebody Told Me" |
| Original Performer: | The Killers |
| Parody Song Title: | "Switching Churches" |
| Parody Written by: | Joey Dearing |
The first half of the song is about a bad church with a bad pastor, and the second half is about a good pastor of a good church (I had Ruckman in mind.)
Breaking your back just to stay awake
Seventeen minutes you've had it with that fake
You're choosing your church based on a mistake
Cuz heaven ain't close in a church like that
Anything goes cuz that guy's full of crap
And heaven ain't close in a church like that
I said heaven ain't close in a church like that
Get your butt out, get your butt out tonight (woohoohoo)
Never thought he'd be a devil and still be so polite?
Well somebody told me
You have a preacher who's more like a teacher
But he doesn't know jack crap cuz he's stupid
Screw all his credentials
They're not essential
Now you should listen to someone new
Come to my church, I'm not going without you
Cuz heaven ain't close in a church like yours
I said heaven ain't close in a church like yours
Come to my church, come to my church tonight (woohoohoo)
Never thought you'd meet a Christian pushy and rude as I?
Well somebody told me
You met a baptist who sounds like a "racist"
Well that guy's my pastor and they don't get him
All his sermons are great
He doesn't preach hate
Stop puttin stop puttin him down
Make yourself for me
Please say maybe baby please
Cuz you have to hear him (maybe baby please)
But all you wanna do is cry
Cuz somebody told me
You met a baptist who talks with a clenched fist
And you think he's scary cuz you're so thin-skinned
That's inconsequential
You've got potential
Quit puttin quit puttin him down
Somebody told me
You met a baptist who looks like he's real pissed
Well why shouldn't he be? World's full of evil
His love is torrential
He's reverential
Stop puttin stop puttin him down
Somebody told me
You met a pastor who acts like a bastard
But I know him better and he's a great man
He's not presidential
He's quintessential
Stop puttin stop puttin him down
Seventeen minutes you've had it with that fake
You're choosing your church based on a mistake
Cuz heaven ain't close in a church like that
Anything goes cuz that guy's full of crap
And heaven ain't close in a church like that
I said heaven ain't close in a church like that
Get your butt out, get your butt out tonight (woohoohoo)
Never thought he'd be a devil and still be so polite?
Well somebody told me
You have a preacher who's more like a teacher
But he doesn't know jack crap cuz he's stupid
Screw all his credentials
They're not essential
Now you should listen to someone new
Come to my church, I'm not going without you
Cuz heaven ain't close in a church like yours
I said heaven ain't close in a church like yours
Come to my church, come to my church tonight (woohoohoo)
Never thought you'd meet a Christian pushy and rude as I?
Well somebody told me
You met a baptist who sounds like a "racist"
Well that guy's my pastor and they don't get him
All his sermons are great
He doesn't preach hate
Stop puttin stop puttin him down
Make yourself for me
Please say maybe baby please
Cuz you have to hear him (maybe baby please)
But all you wanna do is cry
Cuz somebody told me
You met a baptist who talks with a clenched fist
And you think he's scary cuz you're so thin-skinned
That's inconsequential
You've got potential
Quit puttin quit puttin him down
Somebody told me
You met a baptist who looks like he's real pissed
Well why shouldn't he be? World's full of evil
His love is torrential
He's reverential
Stop puttin stop puttin him down
Somebody told me
You met a pastor who acts like a bastard
But I know him better and he's a great man
He's not presidential
He's quintessential
Stop puttin stop puttin him down
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