Go to KFC,
Let me see what I'll have
A bucket full of food I love.

Ugly hats, dirty pants
Ketchup all over my hands,
After sitting down
I can't stand up, ooooooooooh.

Skinny people behind me
Could you back-up if you please?
Half the people on the floor

I see all the other guys,
Shouting "Who ate all the pies",
So I walk out but then get trapped in a door, ohh, ohhhhhhhh.

I just can't stop eating
I'm only getting fatter.
No fragrances work
After I've been to the crapper
'Cause my bellys so big I can't even see my feet
And I definetly can't dance.

Just look at me, Ugly Me,
20 stone and 5 foot 3
I bet nobody thinks I'm hot
I don't really have a job
So I sit home like a slob
And eat junk food till about 12 o clock, ohh, ohhhhhhh.

I just can't stop eating
I'm only getting fatter.
No fragrances work
After I've been to the crapper
My bellys so big I can't even see my feet
And I definetly can't dance.

Dirty clothes that I am wearing
Butt cheeks in my pants are tearing
I just can't stop growing out.
I'm not into reading books,
And even if the TV sucks
I wont get off the fucking couch!!

I'm getting fatter
I'm getting fatter
I can't see my toes,
I can't see my toes
I'm getting fatter
There's no one in the world
that can help me oh
that can help me oh
That can help me.