All the Eskimo guys are in a panic.
Sun's gettin' hotter and we look Hispanic.
C'mon everybody, get the sunscreen.
Arctic is now a lean, mean, grilling machine.
You used to freeze your ass in the seas
It's risin' to seventy degrees
Now I'm really sweatin over here and packing tees.
Ladies showin' their double D's.
We have twenty-three words for snow which we haven't used
We're drowning all our problems in cheap booze.
Our savior is the man Al Gore.
If he doesn't help us soon, we'll be swimming on all fours.
The temperature is peaking and we're sweatin' from all pores.

I said
The arctic is melting.
So take off all your parkas.
It's gettin' so hot, all the seals are gettin' whiplash.

I said
The arctic is melting.
So take off all your parkas.
It's gettin' so hot, all the seals are gettin' whiplash.

Oh
I need me a fan.

Russia now planted a flag and is getting greedy.
The arctic is now more flamming than Governor John McGreevey.
Santa has re-located to Antarctica.
Rudolph did not make it, his nose burst in this sauna.
Global Warming is talked about on the primetime news.
But so is Brit cleaning dog doo.
Those big puddles of water used to be igloos.
The penguins are all now fried chicken.
Blubber and fat now finger lickin'.
This heat is warming up our pole.
One is melting and the other is peaking.
I just got my first mosquito bite.
Stared at the sun too long, lost my sight.
Ice fishing is now a thing of the long ago past.
There are sweat stains under our armpits and down our ass.
How much longer can this warming last?

I said
The arctic is melting.
So take off all your parkas.
It's gettin' so hot, all the seals are gettin' whiplash.

I said
The arctic is melting.
So take off all your parkas.
It's gettin' so hot, all the seals are gettin' whiplash.

(Man, I need a freakin' fan.)
Got a little bit of sunburn.
Got a lobster back.
(Man, I need a freakin' fan).
(Man, I need a freakin' fan.)
Got a little bit of sunburn.
Got a lobster back.
(Man, I need a freakin' fan)
Man, this freakin' sucks.
Earth, what the f***?

It feels like a fryer.
We're all going to spontaneously combust.
People, start making a fuss.
We all feel like french fries.
Double battered and ready to die.
I say we all get the hell out of this damn place.
Temperature is risin' at a considerable pace.
Sweat drops are dropping down my face.

I said
The arctic is melting.
So take off all your parkas.
It's gettin' so hot, all the seals are gettin' whiplash.

I said
The arctic is melting.
So take off all your parkas.
It's gettin' so hot, all the seals are gettin' whiplash.

I said
The arctic is melting.
So take off all your parkas.
It's gettin' so hot, all the seals are gettin' whiplash.

I said
The arctic is melting.
So take off all your parkas.
It's gettin' so hot, all the seals are gettin' whiplash

(Man, I need a freakin' fan.)
Got a little bit of sunburn.
Got a lobster back.
(Man, I need a freakin' fan).
(Man, I need a freakin' fan.)
Got a little bit of sunburn.
Got a lobster back.
(Man, I need a freakin' fan)
Man, this freakin' sucks.
Earth, what the f***?