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Song Parodies -> "Hitler's Dong"

Original Song Title:

"Move Along"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

All-American Rejects

Parody Song Title:

"Hitler's Dong"

Parody Written by:

Hu's On First

The Lyrics

Two historians just published a book arguing that der Fuehrer had an abnormally small penis with a deformity (hypospadias), in addition to an undescended testicle. But other historians have been challenging that claim. It's just the latest in a long line of Freudian attempts to find a below-the-belt explanation for Hitler's behavior.
Do you know what this new Hitler book is claiming
Have you heard it by chance
For what he did, it says we should all be blaming
What was wrong inside his

Pants weren't very full
A pud too small to pull

Oh really?
It's always been the same old song
Blame his dong
Blame his dong
For the things he did
And even though it's probably wrong
Blame his dong
Blame his dong
His libido, id
And his dong

They said he only had one in his scrotum
Other one didn't descend
Hated to be seen naked, didn't show 'em
To anyone, because his

Pants weren't very full
(But Stal' was hung like bull!)

Oh really?
It's always been the same old song
Blame his dong
Blame his dong
For the things he did
And even though it's probably wrong
Blame his dong
Blame his dong
His libido, id
And his dong

(His dong, his dong, his dong, his dong)
For what he did that's wrong, we blame his dong
(His dong, his dong, his dong, his dong)
For what he did that's wrong, we blame his dong

It's always been the same old song
Blame his dong
Blame his dong
For the things he did
And even though it's probably wrong
Blame his dong
Blame his dong
His libido, id
And his dong

It's always been the same old song
Blame his dong
Blame his dong
For the things he did
And even though it's probably wrong
Blame his dong
Blame his dong
His libido, id
Hitler's dong

(Wasn't very long)
Hitler's dong
(His dong, his dong, his dong, his dong)
Hitler's dong
(I Wonder 'bout Kim Jong)....
Hitler's dong

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 2   0
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 3   0
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 5   8
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User Comments

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Rob Arndt - February 24, 2016 - Report this comment
Nothing new Hu- 555! The British and French in the '30s started a smear campaign against Hitler that involved a missing testicle, Golden shower Thursdays, STDs from WW1 whoring, love affairs with relatives, etc... Postwar there is still a frenzy over Hitler escaped to Argentina via sub, moved through Paraguay up to Brazil and died there with his black lover Cutinga! The stories and myths just keep getting wilder, although the majority are already debunked, dismissed.
Rob Arndt - February 24, 2016 - Report this comment
Btw, many reported that early in her career Lady Gaga had a penis too as Hermaphrodite. Proven 100% false! Didn't you do a parody on that topic?
Peter Andersson - February 24, 2016 - Report this comment
Welcome to the SHDC (Schlong Hitler's Dong Club) Hu - 555!
Patrick - February 24, 2016 - Report this comment
I read "Hitler, The Psychopathic God", by Robert Waite just a few months ago. Waite finds a lot of Freudian and sexual causes for Hitler's behavior. I think it is entirely possible for someone to become so focused on a goal that he places that goal above the satisfaction of sexual desire. Did the one-testicle theory originate with that British marching song? Even if he only had one, I don't think that would keep the other parts from working as they were supposed to. Though, it seems all the women in his life ended up trying to kill themselves.
Rob Arndt - February 24, 2016 - Report this comment
No, it all started in 1916 when Hitler was injured in the groin and right leg by shrapnel. If he lost a testicle, it would be in his German Army medical record and his buddies would have found out about it. No such reports or statements. Hitler resumed dispatch runner duties and received a medal. All of Hitler's lovers as well as doctor records were recovered. Again, no missing testicle nor super small penis recorded. No statements by survivor lovers. Also, don't buy into the Hitler escaped to Brazil nonsense on TV or in books. The FBI declassified records only record that they were looking for him in various locations (plural) and that Stalin denied knowing if Hitler had perished or not. But Hanna Reitsch was the only one who could have gotten him out of Berlin prior to April 30, 1945. After that it was impossible as his pilots all were captured and the Russians were within 500m of the bunker. Bormann tried to get out and was hit. His remains were discovered decades later. The SS burned as much of the bodies as possible, broke up the bones and scattered the remains in areas under heavy Soviet artillery fire. A doppelganger was found intact shot in the head assassination style forehead, not through the mouth. All the bunker dogs and the Goebbels family were also dug up and accounted for. The stories of the postwar NKVD, Odessa, Argentina, etc... are largely fabricated or exaggerated. True that the last radio transmission from the bunker was to Tierra del Feugo (Fire Island). But that could be for any number of Nazi officials or SS leadership that escaped to S America. 250,000 Germans escaped to S America in the last year of the war!!! Many set up business fronts in accordance to the Red House agreement. I.G. Farben's NW-7 industrial operatives went there too which is little known.
Hu's On First - February 24, 2016 - Report this comment
Rob -- Yep, I did! It was a parody of "Everything You Know Is Wrong" by Weird Al.
Rob Arndt - February 25, 2016 - Report this comment
Looks like I already tackled that back then!

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