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Song Parodies -> "Poison Hi-C"

Original Song Title:

"Poison Ivy"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

The Coasters

Parody Song Title:

"Poison Hi-C"

Parody Written by:

Guy DiRito

The Lyrics

DKTOS? Youtube it HERE

On Nov. 18, 1978 "The People's Temple" run by a pure socialist Jim Jones in Jonestown Guyana was the scene of a mass suicide of over 900 people. Almost every suicide was completed by drinking cyanide laced Kool Aid®. Jones was a socialist who propelled his agenda in the name of God. Just as David Koresh he had complete control over his "flock". I wrote this parody as a testament on how socialism running amok can end in tragedy and disaster. This is taking an extreme to the extreme I will admit. Are we headed to Jonestown? Probably we are not. How many of your rights are you going to watch evaporate before you realize that there is a problem? How long will you allow the US Constitution to be stepped on and end runs made around it?

I've included a Wikipedia link on the matter and the parody is modeled after news accounts of the incident. News reports about the event went on for months. I am old enough to remember this event quite clearly and the Wiki account is very accurate. My neighbor a US Army NCO was deployed to Guyana to recover the bodies. I was living on an Army post in Maryland at the time. The soldiers that deployed were all given heavy sedation so they could cope with the carnage. I received a first hand account of the situation from my Army friend. If you are not old enough to have been around to observe this thing unfold, then read the Wiki article. I used HI-C® fruit drink in the parody in place of Kool Aid® for obvious reasons. This was a very tragic event and in no way is this author intending any disrespect toward the victims. ALL blame lands squarely on Jim Jones and a handful of his henchmen.

For a Wikipedia account of the events at Jonestown, Guyana in November of 1978 click HERE

There was this guy Jim Jones, while drunk on power rose,
Magic was his touch,
Was a kook of a preacher some such.

Poison HI-C-e-e-e-e, Poison HI-C-e-e-e-e
Kool Aid® spiked they be drinkin', Poison HI-C what they thinkin',
Jonestow-ow-ow-ow-ow-own?

His city's pushin' daisies; when Jimmy got his crazies,
What did you do there, Jim?
What you get for the blunder of sin?

Poison HI-C-e-e-e-e, Poison HI-C-e-e-e-e
Late they're quite, they're not sleepin', makes my skin be start a creepin',
Jonestow-ow-ow-ow-ow-own.

People gettin' jumpy,
Their dump is crowded clumpy,
That sickened sauce they made them drunk's a bitch.
His karma's hold'll rule ya,
No goofin' off they school ya,
But Poison HI-C done turned off their switch.

What did precede the notion, for cu-ra-rine potion?
No compassion to be found,
If in it you be there in Jonestown.

Poison HI-C-e-e-e-e, Poison HI-C-e-e-e-e
Came the wolf to the sheep pen, Poison HI-C's grimly reapin'
Profou-ou-ou-ou-ou-ound.

Beelzebub's all spunky.
That chump, Jim Jones his flunky,
He let the fox inside to watch the chicks.
They're comin' cold so cruel, yeah,
Kalashnikov's they rule ya,
But poison HI-C really did the trick.

All payin' heed devotion, as in the "Land of Goshen",
Grab your ration chug it down,
You bit it; you're goin' soon to ground.

Poison HI-C-e-e-e-e, Poison HI-C-e-e-e-e
It ain't right life not keepin' poison HI-C so did cheapin'
Jonestow-ow-ow-ow-ow-own.

Karma was a charm-a
Not a lotta God-a
Socialism dissed 'em
Gotta lotta slaught-a

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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User Comments

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Andria - July 28, 2009 - Report this comment
This parody was as good as Jim Jones was crazy. I agree that the government is flouting the Constitution, and I say that the Gov't should go back to following it or else the country may cease to exist as we know it, as in be taken over by a dictator, become many separate nations or be taken over by another country. I finally saw the light and decided I don't like Obama as much as I thought I did, and maybe we are "headed to Jonestown". 5s for you.
Fiddlegirl - July 28, 2009 - Report this comment
Well-written, and a lot of wisdom there. When people are willing to abdicate all responsibility for themselves, power-mongers run amok.
Guy - July 28, 2009 - Report this comment
Andria - good for you - it's time. Thanks. I've bit my tongue on issues for six months now and avoided any political parody but I think the time is right now to start to "gently" stir the pot a bit, if you would...

Fiddlegirl - Amen to that one sister. And I've known this since day one. I proudly wore this country's blue uniform for over two decades and protected her from her enemies - and oh yeah, I was born at night - just not last night. Thanks.
The Thought Police - July 28, 2009 - Report this comment
It was still better than that purple stuff!
Guy - July 28, 2009 - Report this comment
TTP - Thanks - I think - but that purple stuff was not really all that hard to beat. I write parody usually with the TV on and what is really sick about this one is the fact that a Kool Aid commercial aired as I was writing this. It was animated. The Kool Aid pitcher figure was on a log in the water with a Coca Cola can figure also on the log and in lumber jack style they spun the log to see who would get derailed. Of course Kool Aid prevailed. I didn't hear what was said in the commercial. I almost stopped writing this after that commercial. =:-(
Mark Scotti - July 28, 2009 - Report this comment
I'll drink to that..................NOT!!!!!!!!!!! LOL!!
Christie Marie M - July 28, 2009 - Report this comment
I drank Hi-C that was spiked at a party I used to go to, but nothing serious really happened to me. It's definitely not poison, Amen to that. I got drunk, though, but I still ended up in the hospital! Great job, Guy! It's all good! 5's!
AFW - July 28, 2009 - Report this comment
Very well depicts one of the worst cult tragedies in history..
Tommy Turtle - July 28, 2009 - Report this comment
Great title (and drink) switch, excellent depiction of the tragedy, lovely irony to do it to a silly OS, TMGLTM.
What happened to the rest of my comment? - July 28, 2009 - Report this comment
2jnd try: Only exception I would take is that in the absence of torture, forced drugging, etc. no one can force people to follow him/her. People give up their autonomy to demagogues like Jones and Obama because it's easier than thinking for themselves. I see Hi-C Fives, but only because Guy DiRito holds me mesmerized by his irresistible will. ;)
Tim Hall - July 28, 2009 - Report this comment
Guy comes through once again!
DJ Blaze - July 28, 2009 - Report this comment
Guy, you are one of the few people who can make an absolute disaster a hilarious parody! This reminds me of those capsule-toys with lead paint in them. The poison rate is... 555%!!!
Patrick - July 29, 2009 - Report this comment
How does anyone qualify to run someone else's life, let alone take it from him? I will concede that Vernon Howell (David Koresh) was a kook, but the deaths of his followers are clearly the fault of the US government. I recall the Jonestown massacre from the news reports. Looking at documentaries, the members of the People's Temple remind me a lot of the crowd I saw at an Obama rally last fall. Most of the problems of the world are caused by people following the orders of others and not thinking for themselves. When I have the misfortune of speaking to a government bureaucrat I often cite the word "Nuremberg". Being victims of modern public schooling, none of them ever recognize the reference or its significance. I hope some day they will. Great song, and a sobering reminder we all need.
MadameNorCAL - July 29, 2009 - Report this comment
This Jimmy Preacher was a trickster who lured many poor SF0 folks to their deaths: 700 ; it happened alongside of the DanWhite(TwinkieMan) murders of SFO Mayor, which led to DianeFeinstein's Mayorship & becoming US Senator.
alvin - July 31, 2009 - Report this comment
laughed in spite of myself...bottoms up !

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