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Song Parodies -> "Christmas For 'Lil' Arnie'"

Original Song Title:

"Christmas In Killarney"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Bing Crosby

Parody Song Title:

"Christmas For 'Lil' Arnie'"

Parody Written by:

TJC

The Lyrics


It's party time for Tiger (who's taken to calling his thingy 'Lil' Arnie'--for his childhood hero Arnold Palmer) now wife, Elin's, decided to return to her Nordic roots.

Youtube link to Bing Crosby's classic version here.
~

[ Lusty Verse ]
Screw fairway greens--
I've blown that scene--
I'm legally known now as 'Tiger Sheen'
It's Christmas for 'li'l Arnie*
Now Elin is heading home!

It's nice to know--
When shanking hos--
That hook n' lay up 'neath yer missile flow
That pre-nup clauses guarantee
That most of me wealth won't roam!

[ Cart-path bridge ]
The Opens, and The Masters
I've ever held in thrall
Though now for me, the gallery's
Addressin' all the balls!

Still, holes in one--
Are way more fun--
When back-nines're catered with sticky buns
Though mistresses be smarmy
And now me cover's 'blown'
It's Christmas for 'li'l Arnie*
Now Elin is heading home!

~Interlewd~

[ 2nd Lusty Verse ]
There's young Colleens--
In vids now seen--
Chris Hansen is prayin' they're all pre-teen
Reporter gals line up--of course
I'm throwin' them all a bone!
Those preachers rail--
My home's a jail--
My handicap's chasin' "le sub-par tail"
Still 'bliss-Missin' 'Lil' Arnie'
While Elin is heading home!

[ Final cart-path bridge ]
Me Escalade's e'er idlin'
To aid quick git-aways
Abaft I'll race when trophy case
The wifey tips me way

El's threatened thrice--
To 'Bobbit slice'--
She's swearin' my putter she'll soon 'de-Fleiss':
"I'll Swiss briss 'Lil' Arnie'
Fer actin' all Stallone"
Then text some stalwart Nordicks:
"We'll foursome it back at home!"

~

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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User Comments

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John Jenkins - December 29, 2009 - Report this comment
Very good, particularly the 'Bobbit slice'/'de-Fleiss' couplet!
Old Man Ribber - December 29, 2009 - Report this comment
Faith and Begorah! (They're the next two who we'll find out about...lol) 5-5-5! ;D
Patrick - December 29, 2009 - Report this comment
I don't watch the tabloid TV shows, so I've had to follow Tiger's antics via the parodies you post here. This is one of the best so far. I've a weakness for good Irish melodies. Wonder why? Like your use of "interlewd" and "Nordicks". Security code for this comment is "FU9".
2Eagle - December 29, 2009 - Report this comment
Elin is leaving him? Oh, I hope so. He is so warped.
UnKnownVO - December 29, 2009 - Report this comment
I'll bet he gots a 'severe handicap' between his thighs . . . not rolling dice there !
TJC - December 29, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks all... guess all those babes aren't quite outta the Woods yet!
blackjack21 - December 29, 2009 - Report this comment
Or the Woods ain't quite outta the babes yet. ;-) 555
Tiger Would's -- That's His Problem - December 29, 2009 - Report this comment
Can ewe see El Lay d'Tiger as a victory at his Temple of the Night Owls? Trouble's bruin' - whooo's next? ... Methinks lil' Arnie is gonna be a Palmer soon! 555
Christie Marie M - December 29, 2009 - Report this comment
Well executed parody there! Lewd and lusty! Tiger's prowling in the wild once again! 5's!
TJC - December 30, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks BJ21, Tiger and Christie... and LOL Would's 'Palmer' and Ewenuchversity quippage... trouble's bruin... heh!
unKnownVotress - December 30, 2009 - Report this comment
Sir, laughed at the "Nordic " line . . and deFleiss line, similar to the deLicing that needs to be done here in NorCAL.
Andria - December 30, 2009 - Report this comment
Great job, and I knew there was something dubious about Tiger almost from the beginning. I've heard that he only started being the jackass he's been found out to be now after he started hanging out with Michael Jordan and Charles Barkley. 5s.
TJC - December 30, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks to UKV, Andria... and Tiger!

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