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Song Parodies -> "The Alternative Matthias"

Original Song Title:

"The Alternative Polka"

Original Performer:

Weird Al Yankovic

Parody Song Title:

"The Alternative Matthias"

Parody Written by:

Matthias

The Lyrics

Yes! My second full Weird Al Polka! You can check out my first one: Matthias On 45 right here. These are a lot of work to accomplish but worth the time and effort because they're a lot of fun. Hopefully somebody creates a backing track for these polkas so someday they can be recorded as well...
I’m…
On Vacation!!!
I’m a tourist, Baby
In your shot I’m leaping

(Everybody!!!)

I’m…
On Vacation!!!
I’m a tourist, Baby
Speak English, In Paree’

Hey!!!

Hey Scram!
Swamp’s cramped!
A Sham!

Lil’ Old Lady Go Back To Your Shoe!
I’m gonna toss out that Dish and Spoon!
And that cow that jumped over the moon!
Yer vamoosed!

Farquaad dumped all these freaks outside!
These clumsy rats claim that they’re blind!
And now this Ogre’s in a bind!

Mind’s blown!
In Woe!
Please Go!
You’re thrown!

They’re so dumb!
Tom Thumb!
Is scum!
I’m bummed!

I am stunned!
No fun!
They’re shunned!
Want none!

I’ll ride the double loop and bumper cars
Lock down that harness or lower that lap bar
I’ve ridden a slew but I want more!
No Ferris wheel that thing just makes me snore!
Through tunnels I’ll shoot and over hills
Until my brain erupts
From all the physics I have endured!

Feed me!
I poured myself Chianti
Hungry!
With fava beans as well
Starving!
The only other thing I need
Is your liver… That would be swell!

I want to eat you like a cannibal!
I want to much on both of your eyes!
You know me: My name is Hannibal!
Don’t keep your distance inlaws
You’re soon inside of my jaws!

Hey!
Hey!
Hey!!!

I miss, miss, miss, miss, miss
Then split, split, split
Yell: “Dang! Dang! Dang! Dang! Dang!”
Each ball I fling is gonna blow

Cause your place is insane filled with stains
On your table there are McDonalds bags piled mountains high, Gross!!!
I think we should set it all aflame
Or foreclose and bulldoze it all into the ground
To the ground to rid you of trash mounds

Before the police fine you
With this mess you made out of your own place
Pull out hair when I toss things
Into Hefty bags and I hear you scream
LEAVE! LEAVE! LEAVE IT ALONE!!!!

Hey!!!

Check the Scoville Rate when I go out for lunch on a date
Unless it is basted in ghost chili I will not taste
My lips are flayed cause the acid just eats them away
If you can’t stand the heat from the kitchen go move your feet

I’m Facebook pals with you
Or so I’m told
That guard named Charlie who
Lifts the gate at my work

Guards will go through all your things!
Leave at home your ecstasy!
Any drug that packs a zing!
Mary Jane you tried to bring!

There’s no fun
It is shunned
Our lives are now mundane
There’s no fun
Don’t be stunned
Can’t say puns

There’s no fun! There’s no fun!
Such a frump
There’s no fun! There’s no fun!
Life’s the dumps
There’s no fun! There’s no fun!!!!

We’ll holler their lines
“I’m a Sweet Transvestite!”
While we’re wearing fishnet stockings and black gloves
Fans are chucking toast and toilet paper rolls
Then call Brad an “asshole” and “slut” for Janet!

Each week I dress up with these creeps
In gold underpants like Rocky
The virgins take the stage
With strange acts they’re engaged
Then we’ll flip off the lights
To start the flick!

Lights… To… Start… The… Flick!!!!

HEY!!!!

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 4.0
Overall Rating: 4.3

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

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 4   1
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 5   2
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