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Song Parodies -> "No Hos (Clean Badave.com Edit)"

Original Song Title:

"No Scrubs"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

TLC

Parody Song Title:

"No Hos (Clean Badave.com Edit)"

Parody Written by:

Below Average Dave

The Lyrics

The first version I submitted here had beyond acceptable spelling errors, the lyrics themselves have not changed much, but here is a not so out of control version of "No Hos" and also different from the first time, I created a Clean Edit of it in recorded form to Hear it for free at badave.com!
Ooooooooooooooh

A Ho is a girl that thinks she's fly
and is also known as a hustler
(hustler, hustler)
Always talks about who she slept
and just waits for a desperate mess

So NO I don't want your pager
NO I don't want you in my bed
and NO I don't wanna get you nowhere
NO I won't let you near my head and no

I don't want no ho (no ho no ho)
A ho is a girl that can't get no dough from me
Hanging on the broad street side
of some New York Drive
Tryin' to flash 'em at me

I don't want no ho
A ho is a girl that can't get no dough from me
Hanging on the broad street side
of some New York Drive
Tryin' to flash 'em at me

A ho's checking me and I know she's kinda cheap
'cause all she wants to do is take money
'Cause I'm just getting gas
While she's staring at my stash
Can't give no hooker my cash-so no

I don't want your pager
NO I don't want you with me in bed
and NO I don't wanna get you nowhere
NO I won't let you near my bed and NO

I don't want no ho
A ho is a girl that can't get no dough from me
Hanging 'round a broad street sign
of some New York Drive
Trying to flash 'em at me

I don't want no ho
A ho is a girl that can't get no dough from me
Hanging 'round a broad street sign
of some New York Drive
Trying to flash 'em at me

If you make your money at the truck stops
(Oh yes ho, I'm talking to you)
If you think your body is worth selling
(Oh yes ho, I'm talking to you)
If you have a boy, but you looking for toys
(Oh yes ho, I'm talking to you)
Wanna get with me and take my money OH NO I don't want NO HO

(Nooo Hooo) No Ho
(Nooo Hooo) Nooo Hooo Yeah-ah
(Nooo Hooo) No Ho
(Nooo Hooo) NO HOOOOOO

No I don't want your pager
and No I don't want you near my bed
No I Don't wanna get you nowhere
and No I won't let you near my head so no

I don't want No Ho
a ho is a girl that can't get no dough from me
Hanging 'round a broad street sign
of some New York Drive
Tryin' to flash 'em at me

I don't want No Ho
a ho is a girl that can't get no dough from me
Hanging 'round a broad street sign
of some New York Drive
Tryin' to flash 'em at me

Your Vote & Comment Counts

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 15

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 3
 2
 
 5   14
 11
 12
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

stuart mcarthur - July 17, 2007 - Report this comment
You're just a boy who can't say "Ho!" (actually I challenge you do do that OS, from Oklahoma, next, BADave) - nice send-up of the OS - 555
Pappa Smurf - September 12, 2007 - Report this comment
Love it.
Tim Hall - September 12, 2007 - Report this comment
This parody hits it on the nose regarding the section of Tropicana Avenue just west of I-15 and the Strip. There is a truck stop with slots and plenty of hos.
Agrimorfee - February 21, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC) Ho, ho! I finally took a listen and a gander at this BAD classic. A second chorus change would have been great, but the way you twisted the original to another meaning altogther was great. The video you provide included an extended rap at the 3:00 mark...why not one here? (security code: FUR)
Below Average Dave - February 21, 2008 - Report this comment
One problem with the video as opposed to the regular song is that they added a rap part, I did this parody originally before ever seeing the video, instead by the album version I have, but yes this is an old one of mine, and it is certainly not including the rap part in the video (particularly because It could never be recorded either as all backing tracks I've ever found for this song also do not include it)
Matthias - February 21, 2008 - Report this comment
I was going to mention something about that rap part, but then I read that note from Dave. Now if you pulled the rap off it would have been impressive, this is a tough song, but since you didn't vary the chorus I'm sure it was a lot easier, and... well... a lot less funny. Sorry Dave, I know this is a really early one by you, but I didn't really find it all that funny.
unKnownVoter - February 21, 2008 - Report this comment
< No Mo Ho > gets 555s!
Guy - March 01, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC4N) What Matt says. I have to agree with him on this. Don't much care for the OS either. Eddie Murphy made "Ho" mainstream on SNL - now it is just another word and has lost it's humor value, IMHO.
bobpiecheese - March 02, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC4) Not really funny - in my opinion, anyway. Pacing was good, but the topic isn't me.
stuart mcarthur - March 05, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC4) see above, but I think there may be just a tad too much repetition for this to score comp votes from me Dave
Invisible Boy - March 05, 2008 - Report this comment
I think you were thinking more about the recording of this...which is good. Repeated phrases are fine in recordings, as most "pop" songs repeat the "hook" endlessly.
I've noticed that here, varied choruses are expected...at least on the page. It's a funny dichotomy between "writing" parodies and "recording" parodies.
As far as the term "Ho", I certainly am guilty of using it on occasion. I think it can be funny if used as a "punchline" (although some may disagree). But, any word repeated too many times loses it's punch.
Kristof Robertson - March 05, 2008 - Report this comment
(ABC4N) I'm always too darn late to make an original comment! Oh welll....
This didn't strike me as one of your funnier works, Dave...a little to critical in its tone to get big laffs. Still, a big tune to parody, and you made a fine attempt

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