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Song Parodies -> "Don't Time 'It' Please, Angelina!"

Original Song Title:

"Don't Cry For Me Argentina"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Don't Time 'It' Please, Angelina!"

Parody Written by:

Red Ant

The Lyrics

Julie Covington did TOS first in the 70s but I made this parody from Madonna's version. Part of the "Brangelina - An Amiright Musical" project. In this parody Angelina is my wife.

I go and please her
In ev'ry way
Things I try - night and day - how I fail
But she still wants my love,
After all - I'm her hub
You won't believe me,
But a bad scene,
Has unfurled in our room,
Although she's hot stuff,
Ev'ry night,
I manage just minutes of 'mood'!...

But still I make 'it' happen
I'm man, okay!
Some may say - that my wife - is ideal
Looking at loving mountains
Standing out - blockin' sun
They're the Grand Teat-tons!
Why am I 'down'?, here's the terrible truth:
Seems that her Rolex tells it all:
I'm spent in just seconds - I'm through!...

Don't time 'it' please Angelina!
The news is not ever good news!
This isn't childs' play
Don't need assistance
I'll keep my promise
And go the distance!

But my misfortune
In adult games
They never, said never do end
'cause it seems with this girl,
Who is all I desire
She leaves me sweating
Mere thought - of just petting,
Exciting to me
I'm popping my cork,
(not the wine's)
In 1, 2, can't make it to 3!...

Don't time 'it' please - Angelina!


Don't time 'it' please Angelina!
The news is not ever good news!
But with the wild lays
I need assistance
I blew my promise
I'm short on distance!

But in bed I suck?
A plodding bore who likes quick love?!:
Touche - to you!

I also know your truth,
How easily you blow
When I go Raid -

[grand finale finish]
copyright 2006+ Jack "Red Ant" Fletcher

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 4.9
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 11

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   11

User Comments

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Matthias - February 19, 2006 - Report this comment
"In One, Two, can't make it to Three" had to be my favorite line, great parody!!!
Johnny D - February 19, 2006 - Report this comment
Deserves fives for "Grand Teat-tons" alone!
2Eagle - February 19, 2006 - Report this comment
She gets too flatulant in bed, I hear. The wind beneath your sheets.
Cat - February 19, 2006 - Report this comment
Hysterical, Red Ant. This made me literally LOL, and made me wonder how exactly this made it on here. (and I thought my "Don't Find the 'Zines, Angelina" was dirty...)
Stuart McArthur - February 19, 2006 - Report this comment
Ha! Bravo, Red! Hilarious lines throughout, and kept the tone of the OS - I love the way you kept "distance" in its original spot both times (I've tried to do the same) - this is a great OS for trying to manipulate the OS's lines back into the parody in a new, funny context - 555
Adagio - February 20, 2006 - Report this comment
I thought that "pop the cork" and many other lines were funny. : D 5's
alvin rhodes - February 20, 2006 - Report this comment
ahhh, the joys of performance anxiety...5s
AFW - February 20, 2006 - Report this comment
Excellent job, fives
Red Ant - February 20, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks Matthias, Johnny D, 2Eagle, Cat, Stu, Pat, Alvin and AFW.

Matthias: That was my favorite too.

Johnny D: Originally I had Tetons, but it didn't scan that well to "freedom", so Teat-Tons were born.

2Eagle: Sounds like a Bette Midler parody there.

Cat: Double entendres and being vague is how. I could, if need be, give an innocent explanation for any line in this parody.

Stu: Keeping "distance" was a stroke of luck; it happened to fit the context of the parody. I'll agree on the tone, I tried to keep everything kind of pitiful sounding until the last lines of the verses (and the choruses). I had zero idea where this parody was going at first so I just wrote lines that happened to fit the pacing without giving thought to the direction. The ending took the most time.

Pat: Thanks, that and "(not the wine's)" was my second favorite line.

Alvin: It turns out that my hypothetical Angelina had the same problems. Clones are better. Maybe I should write a parody about that.....
BR>AFW: That's not what she said!
Stephen Harrington - February 21, 2006 - Report this comment
555, funny, I Don't know the original however, but it's worth the vote. ^___^
Red Ant - February 24, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks Step-chan.
Rick C - March 02, 2006 - Report this comment
Excellent job to this one, Jack. Sorry it took me so long to get around to reading it. 555
Red Ant - July 06, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks Rick.

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