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Song Parodies -> "Heaven Denies You ( slam on the new pope )"

Original Song Title:

"Heaven Inside You"

Original Performer:

Alice in Chains

Parody Song Title:

"Heaven Denies You ( slam on the new pope )"

Parody Written by:

Red Ant

The Lyrics

Look at the news link at the top of the amiright page. I did some googeling and it seems that much of this view was taken from 1986 comments but he may have said it again recently. This parody took about 5 minutes to write but so did Ratzinger's thoughts on rock music. Yes, I guess I'll have a warm seat in Hell for me. PS- There is lots of ( chorus x ) in here as he can Pontiff-icate then I won't bother to make up seperate words for every line ( and I have to make it to work on time to shoot adult movies ).Besides, I'm going to Hell anyway so what is the point?
( satanic intro )

Be what you wanna be
Slam what you don't believe
You're not a Pope to me
I don't like what I see

( chorus 1 )
Older than my Grandpa Bill
Heaven denies you....Hell awaits
Like a loving Pope instills
Heaven denies you....Hell awaits
Like the dumbest Pope installed
Fire surrounds you....Hell awaits

And you think you have it well?, Heaven denies you

( chorus 2 )
Yeah, there's problems in your life
That's messed up, but I'm not blind
I'm just rock 'n rolling, Hell awating
You're out of your mind

Do what you wanna do
Go out and bend the truth
Say to Hell with you
Rather be me than you

( chorus 1 )
Do you wish you had John Paul?, Heaven denies you

( chorus 2 )

( chorus 1 )
And I know I'll burn in Hell, Heaven denies you

So there's problems in your life
That's messed up, but I'm not blind
You're just see through faded, overrated
And out of your mind
If the Pope has changed his mind on this, then I will repent for my blasphemy, convert to the Catholic faith, become a priest and listen to hymns and choir music for the rest of my life and be celibate ( and stop shooting adult films ). Oh, wait a minute, that is Hell. Nevermind.

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 4.2
Overall Rating: 4.2

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   1
 4   0
 5   5

User Comments

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Rick C - April 25, 2005 - Report this comment
DKTOS so I can't vote. I like what you're saying though.
Red Ant - April 25, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks Rick C for the comment.No problem on the DKTOS. I literally had about 5 minutes to make this before I went to my REAL job this morning after I saw that news link.
2Eagle - April 25, 2005 - Report this comment
You're not going to go to hell just for listening to rock music because there is no such place.
Scrawny Johnny - April 25, 2005 - Report this comment
Red, you made your first's Heaven BESIDE You. Are you getting rusty when it comes to AIC?? Nah, just kiddin'...this is an awesome parody! Very funny! Don't worry, you won't go to hell. The Pope is just as much human as you and I and the hobo down the street eating from a garbage can. I'll say once and I'll say probably millions of more times: The Pope may have done great things, but he is waaay too over-glorified. Not even Jesus Christ gets that much attention b/c everytime the word "Jesus" is mentioned, everyone gets pissed...
Red Ant - April 25, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks 2 Eagle. Yes Scrawnny Johnny it is supposed to be " Heaven Beside You " but I had about 5 minutes to type this and didn't proof-check it. Yeah, the Pope is over-rated but I won't go tearng up a picture of him on SNL. :)
Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd - April 27, 2005 - Report this comment
Why the rush? Seems to me that you kinda/partially wasted away a really good idea by settling for the first (5 minute) draft. The chorus line "Heaven denies you... Hell awaits" is such a perfect setup for a longer parody with variations to the repeated parts. I like this one but it seems to me that you're a bit too impulse both in writing (and telling us about the details of your impulsivness). :-)
Red Ant - April 27, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks K1chyd. I had to rush to type this as I wanted it on the same day as the news article at the top ( and only had a few minutes to work on it ). I had so little time I even got the OS NAME wrong on my FAVORITE BAND!! Yes, that is impulsive. :) PS- I have a working title of the song and many lines worked out for a completely different topic. I also have several versions of this song that can only be posted on whatfreaks. :)
Your Worst Nightmare - May 06, 2005 - Report this comment
You wrote a parody about the pope going to Hell? That's mature.
Red Ant to Your Worst Nightmare - May 06, 2005 - Report this comment
If you are referring to the line " Say to Hell with you ", I say that all the time usually not to people but tasks, like " To Hell with this ". I don't mean it literally. Besides, I said I was going to Hell for listening to rock music. As far as I am concerned being Pope IS Hell, explained in the footnote.
Mary - May 11, 2005 - Report this comment
While I respect you have a right to your own opinion, I found this offensive. Sure I think that rock music won't send you to hell, but didn't he say that when he was the enforcer of doctrine? Wouldn't voicing conservative viewpoints have been in his very job desciption at the time? As to the construction of the parody, there are problems. The flow of the words gets thrown off at a few points. While it isn't always a bad thing, you do seem to borrow heavily from the original song. Please don't be offended, but I suspect that you were more concerned with insulting the pope than making an effort at making a clever parody. Don't give up though! A skillfully rendered parody can make even the most contriversial viewpoints somewhat amusing.
Red Ant - May 12, 2005 - Report this comment
It's okay Mary. As for what he said, it basically told me that rock music was an instrument of the devil which I in turn took to meant ( a bit cheeky ) that I was going to hell for listening to it, which is why I slammed him. Yes, the parody is offensive and borrows alot from TOS but again I had about 5 minutes to make this. I made this to push buttons intentionally. Atleast you left an explanation which is more than what most people do.
crazy gary - August 20, 2010 - Report this comment
still a funny idea though heaven denies you- i get a laugh

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