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Song Parodies -> "To All the Girls I've Loved Before"

Original Song Title:

"To All the Girls I've Loved Before"

Original Performer:

Willie Nelson

Parody Song Title:

"To All the Girls I've Loved Before"

Parody Written by:

Rex Ungericht

The Lyrics

To all the girls I’ve loved before
The doctor says I’ve got a sore
It’s been there all along
I may have done some wrong
To all the girls I’ve loved before

To all the girls I once caressed
You better go and get a test
What started with hello
Could now be causing woe
To all the girls I've loved before

I looked it up, so now I’m knowing
That if you ever came my way
You really should be H.M.O.- ing
It also wouldn’t hurt to pray

To all the girls who shared my life
I hate to cause you any strife
My message won’t take long
Please check inside your thong
If you’re a girl I've loved before

To all the girls who cared for me
I’ve lived just like a busy bee
I took my task to heart
To pollinate a part
Of all the girls I've loved before

You should have planned on always “no” – ing
And telling me “put that away”
If you find any lesions showing
You’ll know my love is here to stay

To all the girls I've loved before
It’s something you just can’t ignore
The evidence is strong
I gave infected schlong
To all the girls I’ve loved before

To all the girls I've loved before
I want you all to know the score
Because I came along
My virus may belong
To all the girls I’ve loved before

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 14

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   14
 14
 14
 

User Comments

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Johnny D - August 06, 2007 - Report this comment
This parody's humor is infectious.
Lionel Mertens - August 06, 2007 - Report this comment
This is a very funny and appropriate parody for these times. 5's
Michael Pacholek - August 06, 2007 - Report this comment
Remember when Julio Iglesias was on "The Tonight Show" and Johnny Carson did a perfect Willie Nelson impression, complete with braids? There was another time when Johnny did a bit where fans could finish song titles, and someone came up with, "If You Knew Susie Like I Knew Susie... here is the name of a very good clinic." And then Doc Sevrinsen wrote it out and the band played it! A riot! As for this parody, it's very catchy.
Kristof Robertson - August 06, 2007 - Report this comment
An idea so inherently perfect, I'm stunned nobody thought of it before. Still, I'm glad that it was you that managed to put it together, Rex...a safer pair of hands you'd be hard pressed to find. Brill! 555
Rex - August 06, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks Johnny, Lionel, Michael, and Kristof.
Peregrin - August 06, 2007 - Report this comment
Enjoyed this one rex, was going to make the same initial observation as Kristof! Loved "I took my task to heart, To pollinate a part"
John Jenkins - August 07, 2007 - Report this comment
Very clever depiction of what could be the theme song for many entertainers, athletes, and politicians. I particularly like the busy bee/pollinate verse.
Albert Hammond - August 07, 2007 - Report this comment
This is just what I meant it to sound like... Willie changed the words....
stuart mcarthur - August 09, 2007 - Report this comment
that's what comes when you "pollinate their parts" Rex - a fine community service announcement - 555
Tommy Turtle - August 10, 2007 - Report this comment
Sounds like you have a Magic "Johnson"!... lol funny, give it (HI)V-V-V
Rex - August 12, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks Peregrin, John, AH, stuart, and TT.
Bob Funk - January 19, 2008 - Report this comment
Michael Pacholek quote "Remember when Julio Iglesias was on "The Tonight Show" and Johnny Carson did a perfect Willie Nelson impression, complete with braids? There was another time when Johnny did a bit where fans could finish song titles, and someone came up with, "If You Knew Susie Like I Knew Susie... here is the name of a very good clinic." And then Doc Sevrinsen wrote it out and the band played it! A riot! As for this parody, it's very catchy" wrong, they were playing stump the band, where some one from the audiance gives a song title & the band has to play it or the audience member gets a Dinner. Ther title of the song given by the audiecce member was "If you knew Susie" & Doc Severinsen said he knew it & proceded to sing "If you knew Susie like I knew Susie here is the name of a very good clinic" everyone laughed & the audience member got a free dinner. "If You Knew Susie Like I Knew Susie" is a Frank Sinatra song. But I do remember Johnny doing Willie with Julio.
littleCupCakes - January 20, 2008 - Report this comment
I do agree !! Johnny Carson was the Master of Comedy, this Iowa-born American, a true king of pun & fun!
Matthias - July 06, 2011 - Report this comment
A bit graphic (if you have any lesions showing)... But a hilarious take on Willie Nelson's sappy romantic tune.
Agrimorfee - July 12, 2011 - Report this comment
(Artistry) Rex, have you taken care of that little problem?;)
Blaydeman - July 15, 2011 - Report this comment
(ABC) Wow, this is disgustingly funny!
Blaydeman - July 15, 2011 - Report this comment
(Artistry)*
bobpiecheese - July 17, 2011 - Report this comment
(Artistry) I do love a parody that turns the original title on it's head. Great parody here, Rex, TMGLTM, 555 warts!
Below Average Dave - July 19, 2011 - Report this comment
Being that during my brief show skit, this was played several times, I think you already know I love this one
The Skuz - June 10, 2016 - Report this comment
Michael Pacholek and Bob Funk, I want to find that Johnny Carson episode RIGHT NOW!!
Rev. Matt - July 29, 2021 - Report this comment
Hey I remember Doc Severinsen SINGING "If You Knew Susie Like I Knew Susie"! Where can I find the lyrics? I wanna sing that if possible! Hee hee!

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