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Song Parodies -> "I Can't Eat Another Hero"

Original Song Title:

"We Don't Need Another Hero"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Tina Turner

Parody Song Title:

"I Can't Eat Another Hero"

Parody Written by:

Rick Duncan

The Lyrics

An ode to the reluctant dieter.
Out at the deli
Looking at the sausage
I think my gut might break this time
I am a glutton
When I'm on vacation
They're putting lights on my behind
And I wonder if I am ever going to cure it
Living under the weight and all those greasy stains

I can't eat another hero
I don't want to gain five more pounds
All I want is sight beyond my blubber mounds

Looking for veggies I can go chew on
There's got to be something better ahead
Pies and cheese pizza, those days are ending
Face full of chocolate, but I'll be dead
And I wonder if I am ever going to cure it
Living right by the fridge with all those stomach pains

I can't eat another hero
I don't want to gain one more size
All I want is sight beyond my thunder thighs

What we down with our knives
Or just only a fork
Will my story end with a roll?
Mustard and pork?
Give me all that stuffing

I can't eat another hero
I don't want to gain five more pounds
All I want is sight beyond my blubber mounds

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.4
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.4

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   1
 0
 1
 
 5   7
 8
 7
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Royce Miller - February 22, 2005 - Report this comment
Like the "lights on my behind" line, it reminds me of a Stones song, "when the train left the station, there were two lights on behind".....
Kristof Robertson - February 22, 2005 - Report this comment
I would never have guessed you were a porker, Rick...you write like a thin man. :-) 555
Rick D - February 22, 2005 - Report this comment
I'm not a porker. I just play one on the internet.
Bob Gomez, applauding thunderously - February 22, 2005 - Report this comment
Hey, Rick--I loved the "thunder thighs" line--very sly reference to the Mad Max movie. Very well done!...d;:^)
Arwen - February 23, 2005 - Report this comment
L-ing OL, Rick...nice job!
I Heart Tina - August 06, 2006 - Report this comment
This is absolutely hillarious. BRAVO!!!
white trash - July 05, 2007 - Report this comment
hey i remember hearing weird als version of this song
Gari J - May 17, 2009 - Report this comment
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