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Song Parodies -> "I'm Gonna Vote (500 Ones)"

Original Song Title:

"I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles)"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

The Proclaimers

Parody Song Title:

"I'm Gonna Vote (500 Ones)"

Parody Written by:

Phil Alexander

The Lyrics

When I log on, well I know I'm gonna be,
I'm gonna be the one who's voting ones on you
I go looking for your favourite parody
That parody will have an av'rage score of two

If you're pissed off, well I know it's gonna be
It's gonna be me who has really pissed off you
When you're swearing, well it's going to be me
It will be me who's being criticised by you

But I would vote 500 ones
And I would vote 500 more
To be the sad old bastard with a thousand ones
To lower your score

When it's working, don't you know I go "tee hee"
Going "tee hee" 'cause I know it's riling you
I think it's funny, 'cause you don't know who I be
Although I'll be the one who's irritating you

Read the comments (read the comments), I say "tee hee, bloody hee"
If I bother to leave comments there for you
Your blood pressure multiplies by more than three
I'm gonna be the one gives heart attacks to you

But I would vote 500 ones
And I would vote 500 more
To be the sad old bastard with a thousand ones
Who knows what for?

Nya nya nya nya (Nya nya nya nya)
Nya nya nya nya (Nya nya nya nya)

Nya nya nya nya nya neeeyyyyaaaaa-ha!

Well, I'm lonely, and I know I'm gonna be
I'm gonna be the man who ought to get a life
But I'm scheming, you're the object of my schemes
I've got a scheme to cause you anger, pain and strife

I don't go out (I don't go out), I just sit here gleefully
Gloating gleefully at what I do to you
Sitting at home (Sitting at home), staring at my PC screen
'Cause my PC screen shows what I've done to you
Yes my PC screen shows everything I do

But I would vote 500 ones
And I would vote 500 more
A sick and sad old bastard with a thousand ones
To screw your score

Nya nya nya nya (Nya nya nya nya)
Nya nya nya nya (Nya nya nya nya)

Tee hee, clear cookies, vote one, clear cookies vote one more

Nya nya nya nya (Nya nya nya nya)
Nya nya nya nya (Nya nya nya nya)

Tee hee, clear cookies, vote one, clear cookies vote one more



And I would vote 500 ones
And I would vote 500 more
A screwed-up, sick and sad old scrote with a thousand ones
To screw your score

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 27

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
 2
 2
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   25
 25
 25
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Matthias - December 09, 2006 - Report this comment
The Proclaimers, -sigh-, Their my "number one" favorite band of all time
Johnny D - December 09, 2006 - Report this comment
Hey, are The Proclaimers the grand-dads of Devo?
Yoidy - December 09, 2006 - Report this comment
This parody had me laughing all the way through! 555
Serevi - December 09, 2006 - Report this comment
Lol! Very good, and after my last parody i know exactly what you mean! Always like seeing parodies of these boys, although at first when i read the title i wondered if it was maybe going to be about the MacDonald family on X-factor but i don't suppose many people on here will be familiar with that! lol! good job! 1-1-1 ...only jokin' 5-5-5
Jack Wilson - December 09, 2006 - Report this comment
This is awesome! 555!
Phil Alexander - December 09, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks everyone - now, Serevi, that would have been an idea... except that the MacDonald brothers were so boring it would have been hard to put more than a verse together ;-) But it was hearing their rendition of this that made me think it would make a good parody, so maybe they do come into it, after all.
JD- who's Devo?
Mr 1s - December 09, 2006 - Report this comment
Oh boy! the perfect parody describing me!!!!
Phil Alexander - December 09, 2006 - Report this comment
So pleased you could drop in. Only another 999 to go...
Mr 1s - December 09, 2006 - Report this comment
Everyone loves Mr 1s! This site would be so mundane and boring if Mr 1s didn't exist!
Phil Alexander - December 09, 2006 - Report this comment
Mundane and boring? No, I don't think so.
Red Ant - December 09, 2006 - Report this comment
Haven't heard TOS in a while, but this did bring a smile to my face. I wasn't quite sure whether I should give you 5s for a great parody, or 1s to help you achieve your goal of 1000 1s, so I went with the former.
Chris Pollman - December 09, 2006 - Report this comment
Super stuff, Phil ;)
Meriadoc - December 09, 2006 - Report this comment
I wonder if we should rename the 1 man as the 1 -inch man? I suspect the constant oneing, might have something to do with a perceived phallic deficiency... :-P
The Charnstar - December 10, 2006 - Report this comment
I'll be voting 3 fives... that's almost five hundred ones, I'm sure
Rex - December 10, 2006 - Report this comment
I hope you don't mind me giving you ones in groups of five... 555.
Phil Alexander - December 10, 2006 - Report this comment
Rex - my favourite sort of 1s ;-)
Charnstar - have you covered arithmetic yet, by any chance?
Merry - I'm sure there's a parody in there somewhere...
Chris & Jack - thanks :)
Susanna Viljanen - December 11, 2006 - Report this comment
Well, some day ago I wrote the song "Hey Mr Number Ones Man" so that mister number ones guy could prop his self-esteem by oneing it just as much as he wills. But this song deserves three binary code 111s :-)
alvin rhodes - December 11, 2006 - Report this comment
good one..5s
Phil Alexander - December 12, 2006 - Report this comment
As it happens, Susanna, I did something similar:

Hey! Mr. One-one-one Man, vote your worst on me
Unlike someone I have got a life I'm going to
Hey! Mr. One-one-one Man, vote your worst on me
With my AK47 I'll come followin' you.


..but I guess I wasn't wound up about it enough to finish (I think I'd just done one of my other "Tambourine Man" parodies at the time). Will go and have a look for yours :-)
Thanks, Alvin.
Stuart McArthur - December 30, 2006 - Report this comment
catching up on what I've missed this month, and this was brilliant Phil - all those e-rhymes and twisted lines to end in me, be, three, hee, etc. " just added to the effect - 555
Agrimorfee - January 10, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Mr1s shall pay. Meanwhile I pay you five fives.
Max Power - January 12, 2007 - Report this comment
SOTM-Good
Chris Bodily TM - January 14, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) So far, I only see 2 ones, but I see 17 fives, including mine. This definitely has a place in my Top Five, I'm hoping. 555
Below Average Dave - January 15, 2007 - Report this comment
SOTM-The repetition didn't bother me in this parody, because of the content, and it has the best pacing of every song I've reviewed thus far, not that the others have been bad, but this one also rhymes correctly. I'm surprised you didn't link to the OS, not that anyone doesn't know it, but I found it on YouTube anyway (thank you Josh2 for bringing that wonderful site into my life) and sang along, beautiful, funny-up for consdieration on my vote.
Peter Andersson - January 22, 2007 - Report this comment
SOTM - Surely Ones' To Marginal (for this great parody). :-)
Cat - January 26, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) One of the best and most original 1 Guy parodies I've seen, which is a tough job to do. Great work, Phil.

Oh, and Johnny D, as an amateur music historian, I know that Devo actually FAR predate The Proclaimers...Devo have been around since the mid-70s! And they're the band that did "Whip It," FYI, although their first album and their cover of "(I Can't Get No) Satisfaction" are also must-hears if you ask me.
bobpiecheese - January 26, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Ah, it just wouldn't be a SOTM without a site-related parody. And this particular one has made me more than happy, I can tell you!
Michael McVey - January 27, 2007 - Report this comment
Wonderful impersonation of The Amiright Onester. -- MM
Red Ant - January 27, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) See above, and I just now realised the irony in using this OS: The Proclaimers were "one-hit" wonders.
Johnny D - January 27, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) ARE WE NOT MEN? WE ARE PHILBO !! ;-D
Stuart McArthur - January 28, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) see above, and beeeee-autifully done, Phil, or, should I say "tee hee, bloody hee" - great use of the OS and it just lilts along so catchily - and if the ones-guy doesn't feel a total loser/goose after reading this accurate portrayal of his sad life, I'll go hee (bloody hee) - although knowing he's a loser has never stopped him in the past...
Kristof Robertson - January 29, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) The 1s guy is probably now on par with Dubya and Jacko as a favourite target for Amirighters. This is wonderfully sardonic, Phil. 555
Tim Mayfield - January 29, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) To anyone who's been one'd and shall be one'd again, I salute you. Great parody two, er I mean too!!
Jack Wilson - January 31, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM)Loved it then, love it now
Glen S - January 31, 2007 - Report this comment
Thank you, one's guy, for inspiring just passion and uniting the amiright community against you. Fave line: "I think it's funny, 'cause you don't know who I be"
wannabemustangjockey - January 31, 2007 - Report this comment
SOTM - And in a twist of irony, someone actually voted three 1s. How sad. Too bad you didn't include a reference to being 30 and still living in your mom's house, or an inability to get a date or find a real hobby. All of these might help reform chronic onester among us punsters.
Peregrin - June 21, 2008 - Report this comment
I found this by clicking on the 'random' button. What can be said that hasn't already been? A worthy parody subject if ever there was one.
Bitter Bob - September 20, 2017 - Report this comment
I, too, found this by clicking on the 'random' button. Thanks for the tribute!

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