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Song Parodies -> "Four Errors, Dumb"

Original Song Title:

"Forever Young"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Rod Stewart

Parody Song Title:

"Four Errors, Dumb"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

No, it's a baseball parody, not a George W. Bash... but if the shoe fits... This parody is dedicated to the memory of Dick Stuart, a Pittsburgh Pirate who could hit the ball a mile, but was so bad a fielder he couldn't play any position. They put him at first base because he could probably do the least damage there. Still, they called him "Stonefingers." The Pirates finally lost patience, and traded him to the Boston Red Sox, and when the film "Dr. Strangelove" came out, people started calling Stuart "Dr. Strangeglove." Then one day, the Fenway Park wind blew a hot dog wrapper out of the stands, toward the field, and Stuart made a diving catch of it, and got a standing ovation. But he never hit well enough to justify his presence on the field. He was a born designated hitter. So are a lot of players.
(instrumental break)

May the Good Lord present
you with a hand softer than bone.
And may all the booing you've heard
continue in your park of home.
And may you grow to learn how
to field ground balls more true.
And throw out those runners
as they're throwing out you.

Have good balance, runs to save.
I guess you won't, you'll always play
Four errors, dumb.
Four errors, dumb.
Four errors, dumb.
Four errors, dumb.

May good fortune now find you
so your weakling arm gets strong.
Find a glove that will fit right
so you won't take grounders wrong.

And may you never play in vain.
I guess you won't, screwed up again!
Four errors, dumb.
Four errors, dumb.
Four errors, dumb.
Four errors, dumb.

Four errors, dumb.

Oy!

(instrumental break)

And when you finally fly away
the fans will tell you to go to hell.
For why you've played bad for a lifetime
no one can ever tell.

But whatever road you choose
we know why have made us lose!
Four errors, dumb!
Four errors, dumb!
Four errors, dumb!
Four errors, dumb!

Four errors, dumb!

Four, four errors, dumb!

Four errors, dumb!
The security code for this parody was "DDT." Should've saved that for parody about the environment. Better yet, about its opponents.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.0
How Funny: 4.0
Overall Rating: 4.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   1
 1
 1
 
 5   3
 3
 3
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

alvin - September 15, 2007 - Report this comment
i love your baseball parodies...lamentful tone fit the OS well
Max Power - September 16, 2007 - Report this comment
Wonder how he'll try to put on his 1960 WS ring. Pirates done it in spite of him.
Dylan Baranski - September 16, 2007 - Report this comment
A mile!?!?!??!?!? Are you serious!?
Michael Pacholek - September 17, 2007 - Report this comment
No, Dylan, it's an expression! He could hit it 500 feet, though. Max: Seeing as how he's dead now, I guess we'll never know.

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