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Song Parodies -> "Grads"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:

Michael Jackson

Parody Song Title:


Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

A Bud with lime
tastes a lot like shite—
it’s got no taste,
I’d rather do
shots of Tequil’…
drunk outa my mind,
and then get ill.
Chug on, chug on,
not haltingly,
get tight.

Now, drinkin’ brew,
that ain’t for me.
Me studyin’
you’ll never see.
I’m in a crew
with open mouths.
Our claim to fame:
shots flowin’ south,
as in the House (Animal, that is).
Campus colleagues call us dimwits,
something they should all eschew…
say we should focus on studies,
but that ain’t what we do.
They say we’re bad, just sad f*ckoffs.
We’re really sad, so sad, they scoff and crow.
We’re really bad, so bad, they scoff and crow.
They call us a “jerk crew,”
too often plowed.
But we don’t want them as friends;
their rap don’t get us down.

Our gruesome pong
is from throwin’ up.
We hit the bong
and get real high.
Joe, give me a light;
I’m tokin’ up,
close eyes to sight
then fall asleep.
The dean of men’s
makin’ no bones
on where he stands:
He has about reached his limit
with nonacademic crew.
So he threatens an annulment
of all the things we do.

Because he’s mad, he’s mad, pissed off.
He is so mad, he’s mad, fuse set to blow
He is so mad, he’s mad, dude’s set to blow

He’s gonna make us answer, that’s his vow…
tells us over and again, we’re bad.
He says, we’re gonna feel sorrow;
the music we’ll have to face.

Then he goes on with his braying,
and our hearts start to race.
“You won’t be grads! That’s what he scoffs.
We won’t be grads?! No grads—say it ain’t so!
We won’t be grads?! No grads for us—oh no!

Ah, but we have an answer to his vow:
It involves the payment of some cash.
We give him swag, some cash—a lot!
We give him cash, then give some more.
A lot of cash he’s set to score.

Then he conveniently forgets his vow.
As the year comes to an end,
we’re grads.
We’re grads!

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   8

User Comments

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Agrimorfee - September 28, 2018 - Report this comment
They were on "Double secret probation!" .
Jonathan - September 28, 2018 - Report this comment
Congrads! 5s
paul robinson - September 28, 2018 - Report this comment
I didn't drink much then,, but I made up for it with various & sundry varieties of mind-bending drugs. I don't think I ever amassed enough credits to qualify as more than a freshman. I'm grading this "A+" and giving you 5-5-5 credits toward your Masters Degree in Parody Writing, but it's probably not a good idea to use me as a reference.
Matthias - September 28, 2018 - Report this comment
I'm surprised that you're the only one who went with the hardcore partying frat boys in college. This was a great parody and a heck of a lot of fun!
CML - September 28, 2018 - Report this comment
Because he's JAB, he's JAB, you know it, he's JAB ... And the whole site has to answer right now who the master really is ... it's JAB!!
Peter Andersson - September 30, 2018 - Report this comment
I'm signing up for Party Down 101 so I can have the best of both worlds. JAB is already at Party Down 555.
Stuart McArthur - October 01, 2018 - Report this comment
Grads have a lot of explaining to do JAB. A lot of Proustian deals made with the devil to get those letters after one's name - 555

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