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Song Parodies -> "Play Madonna's Movies"

Original Song Title:

"Blame It On The Boogie"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Michael Jackson

Parody Song Title:

"Play Madonna's Movies"

Parody Written by:

Stuart McArthur

The Lyrics

Of all the dubious things Madonna has done, what is the worst of the worst? Here's my nomination.......(listen to the OS which is temporarily here)

Madonna's always dancing
which isn't such a bad thing
compared to other bad things
in her...life

but IF you want the worst thing
(although that cupboard's bursting)
THIS should be the first thing you should try...

don't play Madonna's new songs
don't play Madonna's old songs
don't play Madonna's albums
play Madonna's movies

don't play the "Justify" song
don't play the U.S.Pie song
don't play the "Borderline" song
play Madonna's movies

Madonna's films are boring
a one-stop-shop for snoring
perfect for ignoring
yessirreee

tho Shanghai did Surprise me
I somehow sat through five scenes
but still dozed off to sleep eventu-leee

don't watch her tummy rippling
don't watch her tongueing Britney
don't watch Madonna stripping
watch Madonna's movies

(and th')
Lettermanshow-curse-fest
has there ever been a worse guest?
is there something even worse? - yes
play Madonna's movies

I just can't
I just can't
I just can't watch Madge on screen

I just can't
I just can't
I just can't watch one more scene

I just can't
I just can't
I just can't stay in my seat

I just can't
I just can't
I just can't control my feet

......cone tits
don't perv at her homegrown bits
don't play her overblown hits
play Madonna's movies

forget Madonna's odd display
of love for Dennis odmanRay
don't play Madonna's "Holiday"
play Madonna's movies

[ cut to crowd all moonwalking out of the cinema ]

Madonna once was groovy
tho' never in a movie
although it can be soothing
t'sleep through...it

they say that Warren Beatty
kinda liked her (maybe)
'til she wrecked Dick Tracy and he split

don't play Madonna's old hits
don't play Madonna's gold hits
don't play Madonna's film clips
play Madonna's movies

ignore her wildwest look
and any of her next looks
don't buy Madonna's "Sex" book
play Madonna's movies

Susan? (no)
Lola? (nope)
Papa? (nup)
MOVIES!!

(how about kab-)

balah? (nope)
England? (.......)
orphans? (mm-mm)
MOVIES!!

(or that thing with)

Esther? (nuh......)
boy-toy? (nuh.....)
Malawi? (nuh....)
MOVIES!!

(what-about-striking)

the pose? (nuh.....)
Sean Penn? (nuh......)
Penthouse? (nuh......)
MOVIES!!

Missus? (nuh.......)
Richie? (nuh.......)
Pepsi? (nuh.......)
MOVIES!!

(fade)

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 31

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   4
 3
 3
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 2
 1
 
 4   0
 0
 1
 
 5   27
 26
 26
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Kristof Robertson - December 11, 2006 - Report this comment
Is it too early to be shouting SOTM contender? This is TOO funny...the first two verses hooked me (ALWAYS the sign of a good parody) and the rest reeled me in. Wunderbah! 555+
Jack Wilson - December 11, 2006 - Report this comment
AWESOME job 555!
Susanna Viljanen - December 11, 2006 - Report this comment
Neat. 555
Matthias - December 11, 2006 - Report this comment
Madonna can act????? Is she any better than Paris Hilton at least?
John Barry - December 11, 2006 - Report this comment
Interesting idea: parody about one washed-up popster set to the tune of another.
TJC - December 11, 2006 - Report this comment
Immaculate Perception turned Perfect Parody... that's what you've accomplished here, Stuart!
AFW - December 11, 2006 - Report this comment
Some tricky rhymes and very funny times, here
alvin rhodes - December 11, 2006 - Report this comment
never seen one but i was happy to look at this
Stuart McArthur - December 11, 2006 - Report this comment
thanks Kristof - if only even one of her movies could do that...

thanks Jack and Susanna :-)

thanks Matthias - although I don't exactly say it, my intended message here is a pretty strong emphatic capitalised "NO" ;-)

thanks JAB, TJC, AFW (phew - just a few letters short of the whole alphabet there!)

me neither alvin - although I've seen the opening credits on a few - thanks mate
Phil Alexander - December 11, 2006 - Report this comment
Perfect, Stu. I think I smell a SOTM contender, here.. hold on a sec, Kristof has already said that. Maybe he's right :-)
Phil Alexander - December 11, 2006 - Report this comment
PS I have a recording of "I'm Sorry I Havent A Clue", in which the lyrics of this OS are sung to the tune of the Battle Hymn of the Republic - and I can never remember the original tune. So I sang most of this to the Battle Hymn - and it works just as well ;-)
Stuart McArthur - December 11, 2006 - Report this comment
thanks Phil - hmm with 2 such illustrious suggesters, how can I not take their advice?....and I just tried reading it to Battle Hymn (which I've parodied to within an inch of its life for a recent SOTM entry) and couldn't get it happening at all....(time lapse after an idea occurs).....ah, just tried it again with the chorus and it worked - neato!
Red Ant - December 11, 2006 - Report this comment
Funny work throughout, Stu, but I LMAO at "odmanRay." I don't remember the movies Madonna has been in, so I suppose that reinforces your point that her acting is horrible and unmemorable. 555
Stuart McArthur - December 11, 2006 - Report this comment
thanks Jack - it can be bizarre where the hunt for a rhyme takes you, can't it...I needed 2 rhymes for Holiday, and from some twisted corner of the universe up it popped - and I don't know if it's her acting to blame, or the movies she chooses
Johnny D - December 12, 2006 - Report this comment
Madonna's Music = Schedule I Controlled Substance.

Stuart's Parody = Schedule 555 Uncontrolled Hilarity.
Stuart McArthur - December 12, 2006 - Report this comment
thanks JD - but I think I'm missing a crucial Madonna reference with the "Schedule" thing - and I trawled right thru wikipedia too, dammit
Johnny D - December 12, 2006 - Report this comment
No such reference exists, to my knowledge. What I wrote was spontaneous good-natured nonsense intended to praise your parody.
Stuart McArthur - December 12, 2006 - Report this comment
thanks again JD - with your (and JAB's and TJC's) comments there's often a deeper subtler gag to reward the thinking reader ;-)
Johnny D - December 12, 2006 - Report this comment
And so it wahhh-uzzz
That lay-yay-yay-ter

In McArthur's comment-bag

Johnny placed his words that won't seem

Like a deeper ...

... subtler ga-a-ag!
Stuart McArthur - December 12, 2006 - Report this comment
*waits, hoping JD continues up to the bit about the 16 vestal virgins*
Agrimorfee - January 10, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) I can't play your mp3 of this DKTOS, but that doesnt prevent me from saying that this was really funny and creative. Probably one of the best of this month.
Chris Bodily TM - January 15, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) DKTOS, but I found a YouTube video. Wow... clever idea, clever title sub. Some crazy lyrics here. TOS was actually kinda catchy, too bad Michael had to become a nutcase. 5's for your combination of the two biggest stars of the 1980s.
Max Power - January 21, 2007 - Report this comment
SOTM - Contenda
Below Average Dave - January 22, 2007 - Report this comment
SOTM-Madonna, Madonna, Madonna, really caught her current position as far as lost status. . .It's going be tough picking my top 5, but this one gets bonus points from me for not being a Christmas one. . .Very cool.
Peter Andersson - January 22, 2007 - Report this comment
SOTM - Some pop stars just can't make the transition to the big screen and that Madonna singlehandedly killed Pierce Brosnans Bond run by having scenes against him (noone could take him serious as Bond after that) may be the worst example. Yet! Now that Posh Beckham has moved to LA to pursue a movie career (apparently she hasen't watched Spice Girls The Movie herself) I fear that the two of them will be teamed up together, that'll do to Hollywood what the Japanese did to detroit! (And if Pauly Shore is cast for the male lead there will be hoofs of the Apocalypse heard in the sky). BTW: Great parody!
bobpiecheese - January 27, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Now I'm going to have that song stuck in my head for the most part of Term 1. At least it's a good song, and an equally awesome parody!
Red Ant - January 27, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) See above, and a few notes: 1) You have probably made the perfect parody of this OS. 2) Johnny D's comment makes sense if you are familiar with how drugs are scheduled here in the US: Schedule 1 is stuff that is completely illegal due to having no accepted nor legitimate uses (sorta like Madonna's music, 'cept it makes good parody fodder =)) 3) .m4a file formats (what you provided) I believe are I-Tunes d/ls, and aren't (or used not to be) compatible with many older players.
Cat - January 27, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Couldn't find the OS anywhere...but this was still a great, great read. I second the greatness of the "odmanRay" line.
Stuart McArthur - January 28, 2007 - Report this comment
thanks for pointing that out (about the itunes) Jack - and for confirming it Cat.....

but it's a good thing, because it made me hunt down and find the original fantastic film clip on youtube, with the then-fantastic Michael Jackson at his gyrating young still-black dude peak - check it out at

www.youtube.com/watch?v=vdjsmk8PJlo
Kristof Robertson - January 29, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) As I've already said before, this one feels like it should have a medal hanging around its neck. This is gonna be a tough month....:-(.
Michael McVey - January 29, 2007 - Report this comment
And what's REALLY nasty is that she has an heir-apparent in Bratney.---MM
Tim Mayfield - January 30, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) But I kind of liked Dick Tracy... Maybe I should watch it again, just to be sure.
Johnny D - January 30, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) See above!
Phil Alexander - January 31, 2007 - Report this comment
Ah.. so you entered this into SOTM... bugger.



;-)
Jack Wilson - January 31, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTM) See above
Glen S - February 01, 2007 - Report this comment
You officially know WAY more than me about Madonna. Good use of original, ingenius title sub, and great flow. I can't complain here.
wannabemustangjockey - February 01, 2007 - Report this comment
SOTM - Great, now I'm going to have Spaff's "Esther Madge Veronica Louise Ciccone Ritchie" stuck in my head all day! >.<
Ana - February 05, 2007 - Report this comment
That is so cute. 555 all the way!
Rick C - March 23, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTY) Well, I'm a bit late getting to this. For that, I'm sorry, Stu but, thanks for all the laughs :-) 555
Spaff.com - March 24, 2007 - Report this comment
I heard she was pretty good in that bonus video that came with the Sex book.

Gotta tell ya, Stuart, you had me with the first verse. And then the "worst thing/cupboard's bursting" rhyme in the second. And then the innumerable killer rhymes throughout. You make it look easy, but it ain't. "Odd display/Holiday/odmanRay" don't come from no rhyming dictionary, folks.
Below Average Dave - March 31, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTY) Well, I already really made a comment on this that describes my opinion. . .
Matthias - October 19, 2007 - Report this comment
Ouch... It's going to be hard to compete with this... You're not like a virgin when it comes to talent, lemme tell yeh.
Agrimorfee - October 25, 2007 - Report this comment
Now, a year and a half later, thanks to wonderful innovation of the 'net called Youtube, I have finally given this song a listen to that it deserves. And it has stolen the competition once again!
Kristof Robertson - October 31, 2007 - Report this comment
(Dec 2.2) Unlike Madge herself, time has been very kind to this parody. And I don't think she's made one since you posted this...maybe she got the message...wonderful stuff!
bobpiecheese - November 01, 2007 - Report this comment
(Decathlon 2.0) See above! Still lovin' it!
Below Average Dave (badave.com) - November 01, 2007 - Report this comment
(Dec2) "Madonna, Madonna, Madonna, really caught her current position as far as lost status. . .It's going be tough picking my top 5, but this one gets bonus points from me for not being a Christmas one. . .Very cool." to quote my earlier opinion
Jeff Reuben - November 01, 2007 - Report this comment
Lol, it would have been so hard to pick just one Madonna movie, so I'm glad you hit all of them =) Sorry I missed this the first time around!
Jack Wilson - November 01, 2007 - Report this comment
See above!
Mikey Squirrel - November 01, 2007 - Report this comment
DEC2- It's nice to see someone else really trash Madonna's movies. Very funny and well done, Stu.
Arwen - November 02, 2007 - Report this comment
Decathlon...I have to say...with no shame...that "Who's That Girl" is one of my all time favorite guilty pleasures. I hold my head high. =) You should hold yours high, too, Stu...this was great!
Ina - December 19, 2007 - Report this comment
Wew, that's good, This parody can reach the top chart and this makes her more popular haha. But I like Madonna, bloody hot...
littleCupCakes - December 19, 2007 - Report this comment
555 for General MacArthur who can aptly trash one of the ' two Michigan Muses' ! I could never see what this woman had in the way of talent ,and who would even spend a dollar on her????
CHEFSHEP - March 24, 2011 - Report this comment
STFU ALREADY YOU LAME ASS MADONNA HATER! LOOK IN THE MIRROR-YOU ARE LESS THAN THE SCUM OF THE EARTH

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