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Song Parodies -> "The Strongest Crime"

Original Song Title:

"The Longest Time"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Billy Joel

Parody Song Title:

"The Strongest Crime"

Parody Written by:

Guy DiRito

The Lyrics

Click HERE for The OS of Billy Joel's "The Longest Time"


Oh, oh, oh, no,
For the strongest crime
Oh, oh, oh
For the strongest
See them dead wise guys who lost the fight,
We can't chill they're manic "Lefty's" right.
Where's "Nelse's" "ice crew"?
They went and fired at you,
Must stop this scrappin' for the strongest crime.

One guy shot at "Incident" [1] slow drawn,
He will miss his penis now it's gone.
That's where the round be,
He was shot by arms profoundly,
He lost his men's-ware yes he lost his vine.

Oh, oh, oh, no
For the strongest crime
Oh, oh, oh
For the strongest
Hit Joe's boys they're gearing for a brawl,
Hope they paid their medical this fall.
Oh how we'll bleed you,
They'll be like bleeded meat stew,
'Cause we're the fam'ly with the strongest crime.

"Baby Fist" got blasted on his dong,
And he squealed to heights,
Could break a glass bong.
They be have him doping real hard,
His johnson's ajar.
Started war now his ropes sore.

There goes "Frankie Furter" to the john,
They be sees him charry dead and gone.
We called on "Matches"
He lit up real nice the hatch pit.
Frankie the furter got scorched like rib prime.

Then in seconds shots they did start,
I heard someone yelp,
Shot one through the heart.
Then I saw the "Who Man" stop the car,
He wondered in a bar,
He bit more than he doped for.

We won't spare these cons; we'll quench this thing,
'Cause we got the tools for pester-dings.
It was their so bad,
These dinks we shot to hell at,
We contend us bold few do the strongest crime.

Oh, oh, oh, no,
We're the strongest...

[1] Reference "The Incident Man" to find out who this is.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   4
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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

alvin - December 12, 2007 - Report this comment
love the nicknames....lol.....hate the OS but these lyrics to that bouncy tune slay me (not literally)
Carmine (2-LOUD) Boccotesta - December 12, 2007 - Report this comment
Hey-E Ovah 'eah, Huh? - I wuz glad da seez Baby-Fist ged a rope burnt - hez alwayz bin a koky SOB - HA HA - nowz he doan beez so koky. HA HA HA HA HA. Hez gotz dat hanel whenz hes wuz ad hiz Don's kids berfday pawdy. Dey had da Rodney King memorial pinata an alla kidz wuz swingin' blinfolted an' won a dem smacked Baby Fist ovah da hed wit a stik. He gawd so mad dat he jurkt da pinata down an smacked id wit his fist. He broke iz han onna paper pinata an datz whyz hez calt Baby Fist. ... Hol on won - Wuz zat yous say Rocky? Da Chinese iz movin' in? Hey-E sorry folks - gotta go an perteck my inerests. 2-LOUD Otta 'eah.
Dee Range - December 12, 2007 - Report this comment
I had to stop and put on a protective cup halfway through this one lol. "Men's ware, "Frankie Furter',...."his johnson's ajar" really cracked me up. Keep 'em rollin' Guy
Guy - December 12, 2007 - Report this comment
Alvin - I like the OS as I do almost all of BJ's songs. Glad you liked the nicknames. Sometimes that is the only thing I can use to get a pace/rhyme/sub combo to work. Now I gave away a trade secret. Some of the names are of actual people that I have known. Others are made up to protect the guilty. Thanks.

Dee - Listen to Carmine - He's hinting about tomorrow's parody. Oh, you may remove your cup now. Thanks.
stuart mcarthur - December 12, 2007 - Report this comment
exactly what alvin said - is this a Sopranos parody? not sure about the nicknames - great rhythm to this - 555
Guy - December 12, 2007 - Report this comment
Stu - I have seen very little of the Sopranos.. Let's just say I grew up around stuff like this but had enough sense to get away from it. Some of the nicknames on the Sopranos that I know are "Feech" "Sack" "Big Pussy" & "Pauley Walnuts". I think I used "Feech" in a parody or two. The rest are either made up or are nicknames of real people that I knew or knew of. Thanks Stu.
littleCupCakes - December 13, 2007 - Report this comment
Although I don't 'get' most of this East Coast jargon, it's a Bad~0~Bad~O Bing: 555. Oh, Tony I miss you so !!

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