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Song Parodies -> "Zola"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:

The Kinks

Parody Song Title:


Parody Written by:

Phil Alexander

The Lyrics

Anyone who's seen Gianfranco Zola play football will understand this one: though I'm not really a Chelsea fan, I love watching Zola play, especially when I realize he's the same age as I am and still playing first-class football (I'm talking real football here, what our American friends call "Soccer")

I saw him on the pitch down at Stamford Bridge
Where they punch you in the face, and what you spit out is a molar
M-O-L-A mola

I saw a little wizard who was dribbling the ball
I asked for his name and fifty thousand guys shouted "Zola"
Z-O-L-A Zola, Gianfranco Zola

Well, I'm not the world's biggest Chelsea fan
But when he went past defenders, I though Wow! that's some man
He is Zola, Gianfranco Zola, Gianfranco Zola

Well, I'm not young, and he looks rather old
But I've never seen a football so perfectly controlled
As by Zola, Gianfranco Zola, Gianfranco Zola

Well, I watched the game and he played alright
Everyone say he's gonna score tonight
Then he went past one player, then past two more
The crowd roared "It's Zola and he's going to score!"

Well, I'm not the world's biggest footballing fan
But what I can't do, I like watching guys who can
Such as Zola, Gianfranco Zola, Gianfranco Zola

Then he was cut down, just about to score
He fell to the floor, clutching his knee
We all shouted for the referee
And when the whistle blew, he was up real quick
Lining up for a speedy freekick, it was Zola
Gianfranco Zola

The ball sped over and the way it curled
It must have been the best freekick seen in this world
By Zola. Gianfranco Zola. Gianfranco Zola.

Well I thought he'd retired many years ago
And I'd never seen him playing football before
Zola smiled and he raised his hand
As the crowd erupted - ee, ain't it grand

Well I'm not the world's biggest footballing fan
But I know what I am and I'm a Chelsea man
'Cause of Zola.
Gianfranco Zola. Gianfranco Zola.

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 23

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   1
 4   3
 5   19

User Comments

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Olvan The Terrible - May 07, 2003 - Report this comment
Great parody, but I thought it was going to be about the monster from "The Legend of Zelda."
Peregrin - May 07, 2003 - Report this comment
On the contrary, Phil, the moment I saw the title, and knowing your country of residence, I knew EXACTLY what it was about - and I wasn't disappointed either ! Great work!
Jeff Reuben - May 08, 2003 - Report this comment
When I first saw it, I was thinking "Zora", and maybe another late Joe Millionaire parody. Fortunately...
Claude Prez - May 08, 2003 - Report this comment
I was thinking Emile Zola, who it turns out was a nineteenth century French novelist but I only know that because I just looked it up. Anyway, even though I don't follow either type of football, I liked this, esp. the line about the molar.
FussBudget - May 09, 2003 - Report this comment
That was great Phil.
Rozzy - May 09, 2003 - Report this comment
That was funny. Weeee!
Phil Alexander - May 15, 2003 - Report this comment
And did anybody see Zola in action against Liverpool at the weekend? The guy is amazing...
Guy - February 18, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC-Z) This was as slick as maz-ZOLA. I'm kickin' three fives your way.
Agrimorfee - February 22, 2005 - Report this comment
I thought this would be about esteemed French author Emil Zola. Oh well. :)
Rick D - February 22, 2005 - Report this comment
Unfortunatly Phil, I know nothing about this person, but it paces.
Johnny D - February 23, 2005 - Report this comment
martha - February 24, 2005 - Report this comment
as a Spurs fan I should be spurning this !! great stuff Phil...!!!
Jeff Reuben - February 28, 2005 - Report this comment
Not familiar with Zola in particular, but I love the OS, and I am a soccer player, so I enjoyed this.
ABC's OF PARODIES ROUND "Z" BRONZE MEDAL - March 02, 2005 - Report this comment;topic=3010.0;id=3862;image
dave - May 19, 2006 - Report this comment
why not record it
Danny C - December 28, 2009 - Report this comment
Gian Fran Co Zola Is Taking West Ham Down ... Repeat until May 2010

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