Drive in--your rump's set--
Two CCs.
Push that plunger in tube down;
Don't worry: Selig's a clown.
You're one of many men
Who use "medication"
To boost size; you don't beware
That in a latter day
You'll look like Arnold, they say,
Or Bonds, who smacks 'em in the Bay.

Battin'-brawn stickers take hits;
Battin'-long stickers make hits.
So primed when young,
Then shrivel where stones are hung.

Here comes that man that's scanned wins, pitches, ding's.

He's George; he shows most of them jabbed,
Fixed kick "water" in their cells.
San Francisco's showboat sells
Tickets, though all know how
Those drugs helped him bash 'em;
He's a slugger with TJ*,
And RC** was a stickee,
And juice made Andy not petit,
And that bum Bud whines, "Don't blame me!"

Battin'-brawn stickers take hits;
Battin'-long stickers make hits.
So spry when young,
Then their bones leach calcium.

Where's the game go? We know
Most got shots in fanny,
Made the stats go way higher.
The "kids" who fix are burned
By Mitchell, whom the union's spurned.
Many points not truly earned.

Battin'-brawn stickers take hits;
Battin'-long stickers make hits.
Mighty are stung
By George, not an andro plunge.


*testosterone juice
**Roger Clemens