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Song Parodies -> "Sneakin' Booze"

Original Song Title:

"Deacon Blues"

Original Performer:

Steely Dan

Parody Song Title:

"Sneakin' Booze"

Parody Written by:

Guy DiRito

The Lyrics

DKTOS? Check out the You Tube video of "Deacon Blues" by Steely Dan by clicking HERE

I visit A.A.
Judge's remanding plan.
My scrape must be paid,
Or freedom they'll countermand.
Jim Beam spike only yesterday,
Eyes glazed, glued and glassed.
Got hammered;
Sobriety cast.

For liquor I drool,
My nerves are on edge, they scream.
Want gusto and zeal,
My next drink I plot and scheme.
Seems useless for me to try,
Catch me dis the judge; good-bye.
But it's Miller time,
I'm ready to schlosh some dime wine.

I've learned to slurp while all alone,
And I can't force down a meal.
Rot gut whisky; drank it down,
Drove fried behind the wheel.
Won't take the blame for the sinners in the world,
But it is so lame how I choose.
A piƱa colada drunk I tied,
Not me sneakin' booze. (sneakin' booze)

Close onto last call,
A victim of circumstance.
You lookin' at me?
Was thrown to the wide expanse.
Out through the door I go they shove,
The cops were unkind,
I stagger half blind.

The cops acted hyper,
They drove me down urban streets.
No luck and no winnin',
Languish in drunk cell suite.
I lay there all numb dumb-found,
Covered from the dirt on ground,
In jail I was thrown,
It's nothing like home sweet home.

I learned to work the jail house phone,
And to a bondsman appeal.
Drank not whisky all night long,
So jonesin' bad I feel.
They're all the same all the dinners in this world,
And this food's so lame, what I chews.
So changed panorama this prison ride,
Back on freakin' booze. (freakin' booze)

(Sax Dominated Instrumental Interlude)

I'm such a sight,
Not an upstanding man.
Got wine in the bag,
On back like a roach, can't stand.
I'm fried as a sot, I'm gone,
Boo me when I stay too long.
Another, hit me,
Get drunk as I want to be.

Judge tells his clerk, the facts have shown,
A.A. must now I deal.
No more whisky, wine and song,
Get high, there's no appeal.
We're all the same, all us sinners in the world,
And I went insane and did lose,
The jail panorama, I'm back inside,
Caught me sneakin' booze. (sneakin' booze)

(Instrumental Play-out)

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 17

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   17

User Comments

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Tim Hall - May 22, 2008 - Report this comment
alvin - May 22, 2008 - Report this comment
humorous with serious undertones....and many good line fave of the day
Invisible Boy - May 22, 2008 - Report this comment
Guy, I've enjoyed your latest Steely Dan series, and I think this was the best.
LadyTequilaCakes - May 22, 2008 - Report this comment
Sir, this is good & great, but also a pathetic pathos of a man's deep addiction . . . . I guess that's what makes it the success that it is . . . you describe it so well, Sir Guy!
AFW - May 22, 2008 - Report this comment
Like reading the script from that classic film with Ray Milland, "Lost Weekend"....great testimonial for stayin' sober...think I might take the pledge...(uh, insert joke here about guzzling furniture polish)..seriously...this is some really profound writing..Like a sipper's sermon...
Guy - May 23, 2008 - Report this comment
Tim - Thanks for your attention to this parody. Much appreciate that you liked it.

Alvin - I watch way too much police reality on TV - see what it produced? Thanks, buddy.

IB - I wrote all four SD paodies last weekend and saved what I thought was the best for last. I've been way too busy lately to write through the week. Thanks friend.

M'Lady - Back in my younger days I imbibed a bit so I pulled from that experience but I never got into any trouble with the law over it. This could have really been me if I didn't wise up about 20 years ago.

Farce - Thanks - it makes for a good drunk-a-log if anything.
LadyCupCakes - May 23, 2008 - Report this comment
I agree with AFW about the black/white classic LOST WEEKEND ! Watching that would change anyone's mind about the dangers of alcohol. . . . Also the DAYs of WINE and ROSEs, another black/white film that is Jack Lemmon's best, if you can wade through it . . . Both of these are true testimonials to the deadliness of Alcohol Addiction!
Agrimorfee - June 09, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) This was awesome,,,almost rhymed every snatch of the song, and where you used OS words they were twisted into your story in a new way. And all the while you kept a real SD kind of tone, with the neat conclusion that we are all sinners, it's just that some of us get caught. 555
Jason - June 10, 2008 - Report this comment
(S.O.T.M.) I think this was super. Great effort here dude.
Matthias - June 10, 2008 - Report this comment
I'll drink to that.
Gianni Parmesiani - June 12, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Good stuff here. Followed along on the video and was pleased by the parody. The situation is sadly so human in nature.
Max Power - June 21, 2008 - Report this comment
There's a film called Hard-Boiled in which one of the character's name is Tequila.
Peter Andersson - June 22, 2008 - Report this comment
Earlier today I LOL:ed at the lines "What's the use in being sober, there's no excuse until it's over" in an OS - And now this.. gotta be some sort of karma for me here I think...
Red Ant - June 27, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) I dunno what to write here Guy. The rhyming and pacing are excellent as always, and "what I chews" was a good play on words. I guess it doesn't help that I think AA is a state sponsored cult (and how they get by with having meeting in church basements is beyond me: their own literature is incompatible with the teachings of every known religion, and atheists as well). I guess it also still sucks right now that two of my old friends and another man were involved in an alcohol related crash on Father's Day (I found out yesterday afternoon); the two brothers didn't make it. Eh, I'm rambling here: sorry for blogging up your comment space Guy. This is a really good parody that's just hitting me at a bad time.
Guy - June 27, 2008 - Report this comment
Jack - What can I say but you have my condolences. The parody may come across as humorous but it carries with it a strong message. Judges can force AA attendance but the attendee must want to get better or it does no good. You didn't say if your friends were driving impaired or were innocent victims of someone who had no business behind the wheel. No matter - they are still statistics in the never ending tragedy of alchol/driving related incidents. So many cases of debilitating injury and death occur because people choose to drive when they know they shouldn't and in every case could have been avoided by the impaired making the better choice and not getting behind the wheel. It is all so sensless. I feel for you my friend and your grave loss. Take care and may your grief be short. I've lost friends the same way. It hurts badly. I hear what you say about AA but it has recovered so many of the lost and the government really has nothing to do with their charter. They accept no outside funding because they do not want anyone to dictate how they run their programs. All contributions to run the meeting halls and provide literture comes from donations to those that attend their meetings. I can't say I believe in their methods but they do get good results for those who want the help. It takes an alcoholic to cure another alcoholic because no one but that recovered alcoholic knows how the new comer feels, has been there and can help them out way better than someone who cannot relate in the same manner. It is the "higher power" concept and how it is applied that make them foreign to church teachings and atheistic beliefs. But where else but in a church basement would you tell someone who has faith in nothing about a higher power. The churches that provide free meeting space are outreaching to their communities as well adjusted churhes do. God bless my friend. And may you find peace with this unfortunate turn of events.
bobpiecheese - June 29, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) The grammer was a bit odd in spots, but I'll just say it's a side effect of the booze you're writing about :P Nice work, Guy.
Guy - June 29, 2008 - Report this comment
BPC - My grammar in my lyrics have become somewhat of my signature. Believe me when I'm writing on the job my grammar - spelling etc. are spot on. I don't speak as I write in business and I don't write parody as I do business or as I speak The grammar will most likely stay a signature in my pparody writings Thanks for your take on this parody and believe it or not I had no mood altering chemicals in my system when this was written. Except for an accasional drink with friends like a New Years toast I pretty much leave substance alone. And yes, writing about booze may affect my mood somewhat. Thanks for your observation and comment.
Below Average Dave - June 29, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) I know you aren't one that has the same grammar opinion as I do Guy, so I won't harp on it in my comments because you are aware it is there, and I know you have no intention of recording a lot of stuff which is where grammar makes the biggest difference (which is why I'm kinda antsy about grammar), what I would like to say on this one was a bit too many key words from the OS stuck around which caught my eye as I was reading the song to the rather smooth original. Your pacing is about as perfect as can be, but some of the individual lines were switched so subtly I could have mistaken them for the OS. . .just a personal observation. Congrats on taking on this long song though, long songs have become a staple of late on AmIRight. . .
Phil Alexander - June 30, 2008 - Report this comment
About as unfunny as they come - superb write, Guy.
Jeff Reuben - June 30, 2008 - Report this comment
Yes, I also liked this song as a serious commentary more than a funny parody, although it did have some funny lines.
Invisible Boy - June 30, 2008 - Report this comment
I like this more on my second viewing, Guy.
Sort of ironic that this OS was about Deacon Jones, the jazz sax player who died drunk in a car crash at a young age. (was "So jonesin' bad I feel" intentional ?)
Great job
Al Koholick - September 28, 2008 - Report this comment
I once got myself so drunk one night that I read about my hangover in the morning paper. I had an honorary mention in the obits. This is one fine piece of work, like me.
adagio - October 23, 2008 - Report this comment
Good matching OS to parody and REALLY good parody!!! 5's

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