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Song Parodies -> "50 Ways to Bore the List'ners"

Original Song Title:

"50 Ways to Leave Your Lover"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Paul Simon

Parody Song Title:

"50 Ways to Bore the List'ners"

Parody Written by:

Red Ant

The Lyrics

[intro]

Where to begin? I don't know; start singin' aimlessly
'cause it's so easy if you don't develop theme
A rambling story and by now you're half asleep
There must be fifty ways to bore the list'ners

Won't make it funny there's no jokes that I'll include
Furthermore, my vocal level will be somber and subdued
And you're like "what the hell?" - Only this you will conclude:
"He's found the - fifty ways to bore us list'ners"
Fifty ways to bore you list'ners

It's time for some rhyme crime
Something few can stand
Not as bad as that rap crap
Don't kid yo-self, G
Leave out the puns, just
Wanna make it a fun bust
Just singin' in key, see
It's simple to me

Ooo sing it again, then
Make it cliche, 'kay
I am here to annoy, boy
Just listen to me
All off the cuff stuff
I'll fill it with enough fluff
To put you in a deep sleep
Where you can count sheep

By now you're feeling "Wow, this song is kind of lame
and it's really going nowhere, too" - my thoughts are just the same
And well - I acknowledge that - but I don't seek the fame
I heard it's sh*tty pay

I say let's wrap this up with these few final lines
Provide relief and forever end your suffering and mine
But there's a hitch see, 'cause I have to sing this chorus two more times
Discussing fifty ways to bore the list'ners
Fifty ways to bore you list'ners

Well I'll sing 'em again, friend
Same as before?, snore
Doesn't show any heart, smarts
But catchy indeed
It is all off the cuff stuff
I'll fill it with enough fluff
Oops! that part repeats see
So freakin' sue me

Time for more rhyme crime
I could repeat, cheat
Never vary the hard parts
Original me
Skimp on the tough stuff
And fill it with enough fluff
Just as was with Paul's call
Original-ly

[outro]
copyright 2006+ Jack "Red Ant" Fletcher

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 12

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   12
 12
 12
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Cat - May 29, 2006 - Report this comment
Well Red Ant, you failed in your mission, but you earned yourself some 5s!
Adagio - May 29, 2006 - Report this comment
I wondered why I was yawning - lol

All off the cuff stuff
I'll fill it with enough fluff
To put you in a deep sleep
Where you can count sheep

Good one. 5's
AFW - May 29, 2006 - Report this comment
Great idea..I wasn't bored...and I hope these three fives won't bore you.
Johnny D - May 29, 2006 - Report this comment
Heh heh, great parody of Paul Slimin'.
Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd - May 29, 2006 - Report this comment
Listening to it that way I must admit you do have a point here.
Matthias - May 29, 2006 - Report this comment
Wow, I never did realize how boring that this OS song actually was....
Paul Robinson - May 29, 2006 - Report this comment
Red, Best parody I've ever seen of this OS. You had me smiling all the way through...and I DID read it all the way through, too...that hasn't always happened with parodies of this song. The only thing I regret about giving you "5-5-5" here is that it seems very repetitive at the moment ~ ~ ~
Lionel Mertens - May 29, 2006 - Report this comment
5's
Lionel Mertens - May 30, 2006 - Report this comment
I gave you 5's even though I happen to like rap. But I'm talking bout old school. There's a difference. Anyway, good job. 5's again.
Red Ant - June 01, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks Cat, Pat, AFW, Johnny D, Peter, Matthias, Paul and Lionel.

Cat: Judging from Peter's and Matthias' comments, I'd say I succeeded. ;)

Paul: High praise there given the number of parodies of this song on AmIRight (this one made 49), most of which have been done by high caliber authors. Oh, as for 'repetitive votes', 5s are always welcome, lol.

Lionel: I like some rap; no genre is completely worthless, except for disco.
Agrimorfee - June 21, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC3) Another 555, in spite of Paul's thoughts. :)
Johnny D - June 25, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC) See above!
stuart mcarthur - July 01, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC3#) wow Jack, I hadn't seen that one before - great ending especially, but funny and clever all the way through - great self-referencing and winks to the readers too - 555
The Charnstar - July 02, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC-#) That was great, loved it, 5-5-5.
Michael McVey - July 03, 2007 - Report this comment
Good, but I still like Ray Stevens' "50 Ways to Kill Bin Laden" better.
Arwen - July 03, 2007 - Report this comment
ABC...nice work here, Red Ant...and yep...I think you got them all...; )
Kristof Robertson - July 04, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC3#) Absolutely sublime, Mr Fletcher. Kind of reminds me of Johnny D's "Sick Of Bohemian Rhapsody"....clever build-up all the way through, and a glut of knowing winks. 555+
Cat - July 04, 2007 - Report this comment
(ABC) See above! A pleasure to revisit, very nice wry humor.
Red Ant - July 09, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks Aggy, JD, Stu, Charnstar, MM, Arwen, Kristof and Cat.

Michael: I listened to Ray Steven's version: none of the choruses varied, and even worse he was singing over the original lyrics there. Please tell me that's not the version you know, because in all honesty that's perhaps the worst "professional" recording I have ever heard.

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