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Song Parodies -> "I Am, I Think"

Original Song Title:

"I Am, I Said"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Neil Diamond

Parody Song Title:

"I Am, I Think"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

Captain's Log, Stardate 2005.203: Spock got very introspective today. I had to remind him of the old saying: When discussing the history of human philosophy, remember to put Horace before Descartes.
Spock: Earth is fine, but sometimes it's asinine.
They are logically sway-backed.
Tempers fly, emotions high
and when I lecture them
they're thinking of some payback.

I was Vulcan born and Vulcan raised
but nowadays I'm lost between two worlds.
Earth is nice, but it seems slow.
Vulcan, lo, I miss it, guys and girls.

"I am, I think"
I said, no joy
and no one heard at all
not even McCoy.

"I think, by damn,
therefore, I am!"
And I am lost in space
with just e-mail spam
leaving me lonely still.

Data: Did you ever read about a kid who was made out of old wood
and became a real boy?
Well, that old story matches mine in many kinds of ways
but I cannot feel joy.

I have got perfect circuits deep inside.
I have tried to act human in this zone.
Though I think faster than any man
as a fake man, it would appear I am alone.

I am, I think.
It is not hard.
And no one heard at all
not even Picard.

"I think, by damn,
therefore, I am!"
And I am lost in space
with just e-mail spam.

I am, I think.
It is not hard.
And no one heard at all
not even Picard.

"I think, by damn,
therefore, I am!"
And I am lost in space
with just e-mail spam.

(fade out)
The tricky part was Data's: I didn't remember that he can't use contractions.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 3.9
How Funny: 3.9
Overall Rating: 3.9

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   5
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User Comments

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Johnny D - February 03, 2005 - Report this comment
As the Cogitos go, yours is Ergo than Sum.
alvin rhodes - February 03, 2005 - Report this comment
highly logical...5s
Royce Miller - February 03, 2005 - Report this comment
I enjoyed this alot, Michael, blunt skull though I am (as Baldar Conehead would say).
Ravyn Rant - February 03, 2005 - Report this comment
Okay, I'm a sucker for just about any ST parody, but this one is better than many. Thanks!

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