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Song Parodies -> "Wild Man's Ass is Ham"

Original Song Title:

"Solitary Man"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Neil Diamond

Parody Song Title:

"Wild Man's Ass is Ham"

Parody Written by:

Royce Miller

The Lyrics

you know what they say, if you can't beat em join em
Wild man was mine til the time Diva found us
In a cave, so depraved
She had a big club made of stone
And she chased us
Hung some balls on the wall

Don't know if I'll live
But until Diva lets up
I'm just gonna cringe and I hope she don't catch up
I'm sure in a jam
And Wild Man's ass is ham

I'm hidin' in here til the darkness comes over
Shakin bad
Cold and sad
I know that I'm done and I feel bad for Wild Man
All his parts are now cave art

Don't know If I'll live
But until Diva lets up
I'm just gonna cringe-- if I have to I'll fess up
Now I'm in a jam
And Wild Man's ass is ham
Wild Man's ass is ham

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 1

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   1
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User Comments

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Michael Pacholek - October 03, 2003 - Report this comment
As Royce and Samantha Fox have both proven, naughty girls need love too.
Royce Miller - October 03, 2003 - Report this comment
Well Michael--thanks for your comment--I think I better go hide in a cave after all.
T.J. Spindler - October 03, 2003 - Report this comment
I didn't get it. Royce is a girl? Is this making fun of WM? tj out to figure out
Diva - October 03, 2003 - Report this comment
Surley Royce, you don't think I'd take anything at this site too seriously? This is satire, pure and simple, and you've done a fine job with your parody. I feel quite flattered that you'd even do a parody including me. Just one footnote: Your the author with 200 parodies, and I've a mere 20 (solo), so I'd venture to say who is the real heavyweight here. And as for Wild Man, believe me, there's enough of him to go around.
Wild Man - October 03, 2003 - Report this comment
Girls, Girls, Girls, I love both of you. Gee Royce, I never knew you cared. And Diva, thanks for the compliment.....I think? Thanks for the mention.
Wild Man - October 03, 2003 - Report this comment
Tj, Royce is a girl with a funny name. And she's not 't making fun of me, she just created a funny story that's all.
Peregrin - October 04, 2003 - Report this comment
I laughed 5 times on each category. WildMan should change his name to WantedMan!
Smurf - October 04, 2003 - Report this comment
cute lyrics
Royce Miller - October 04, 2003 - Report this comment
Thanks---I'm relieved. Wild Man and Diva can write a demented parody about me if they want, and I know they can. I do appreciate Wild Man and Diva; I figured with a name like "Wild Man", maybe you guys could appreciate my twisted humor.
Meriadoc - October 05, 2003 - Report this comment
This was a riot! "parts are now cave art!'" :-D
Wild Man - October 06, 2003 - Report this comment
There won't be any demented parodies written about you Royce. This type of parody could be taken out of context. And for the record Diva is a real sweatheart, and it was her decision not to retaliate with a come back.
Guy DiRito - October 06, 2003 - Report this comment
=:O \O/ - NO COMMENT.
Adagio - October 07, 2003 - Report this comment
What a horrible insult to a sweet couple!! Or maybe I should just write NO COMMENT, too!!
Observer - October 07, 2003 - Report this comment
Only the utterly humor-impaired could read this parody as a "horrible insult" rather than a tribute. Especially after the Oct 3 comments, where Wild Man thanked Royce, and Diva said she was "quite flattered." To Guy and Adagio and anyone else who didn't get it and gave this 1's--you owe Royce an apology.
Guy DiRito - October 07, 2003 - Report this comment
Dear Observer. I don't owe anyone JACK. I paid my dues on this site and NO COMMENT means just that. How dare you assign something to that of your own value. I also read well between the lines and I have my own comments that I choose to keep to myself. So don't go putting words into my mouth. Thank you.
Observer - October 07, 2003 - Report this comment
If you have no comment, don't comment. Don't use your stupid little emoticons expressing outrage and surrender--and then pretend you haven't said anything.
Royce Miller - October 07, 2003 - Report this comment
Well I appreciate Observer's comments-there's no way this was meant to be anything but a parody about two people who comment on my parodies from time to time--which I appreciate. The name "Wild Man" really inspired the whole thing, because it conjures up the idea of stuff like caves to me--Diva and Wild Man know I intended no harm, I even said that---
malcolm higgins - October 07, 2003 - Report this comment
I don't remember a shitstorm about me and Meriadoc and Peregrin thinking I would be good in bed, or me with my pips and merry "are they girls and if so I want to do them, and if one's a guy eeuuuwwwww" guys this is a parody site.. laugh and have fun.,. it's what it's all about.. for the record, 5-5-5 royce.. you are still my queen and I bow to touch your hem line.. (next time I do that have a mini skirt on will ya?) btw.. for anyone who gives a monkey's rat patoot about me here.. I'll be having surgery on the ninth, (thurs) and will not be out of hospital till monday.. after that, two weeks of morphine induced parodies on the laptop in bed.. should be fun... toodles to one and all for a while Malky
Guy DiRito - October 07, 2003 - Report this comment
Observer - who the hell are you anyway? All I was expressing was shock at this so get the hell off my ass.
Adagio - October 07, 2003 - Report this comment
I stand by my statement, too, but wish to reiterate that Diva and Wild Man are a sweet couple who have gone out of their way to help me!
Observer - October 07, 2003 - Report this comment
Give 'em enough rope...
Wild Man - October 07, 2003 - Report this comment
Diva and I will be taking a break from Amiright for a while. Sorry if things got out of hand here. I come to the site for R & R and I'm not getting much of that lately. Thank you Amiwriters.
Guy DiRito - October 07, 2003 - Report this comment
Observer - Why don't you just do as your name suggests and just observe. No one asked you to butt into my comment and expound on stuff you don't know jack about. So stop junking up this thread and be a real person and at least let me know who the hell is getting into my ass about this. You made a miscalculation about my comment and you are not PERSON enough to admit when you are wrong so just shut up and go away.
Observer - October 07, 2003 - Report this comment
Wild Man and Diva, some people don't get it, but please don't leave because of that. It's obvious you're well liked here or you wouldn't be getting tribute parodies.
Michael Pacholek - October 07, 2003 - Report this comment
Guy doesn't owe anyone Jack, but I have it on good authority he owes both Bill Florio and Wild Man a six-pack of Bud...
Wild Man - October 07, 2003 - Report this comment
To tell the truth Royce, I did feel insulted. I did not want ro hurt your feelings, so I attempted to stop this fire before it started. Seeing that I can't take a joke too well lately is a sign of burnout. I am taking a much needed real vacation. I have other pressures at work and personal matters. Thanks to all that have supported Diva & Me. I'll probably be back at the end of the month.
Good luck with your Surgery Malc.
Guy and Adagio are good freinds that were trying to support me here. Malc is right , every one put this all behind us and start having fun. We should not come here to argue.
Wild Man - October 07, 2003 - Report this comment
I'll take Guy up on that one.
Guy DiRito - October 07, 2003 - Report this comment
One virtual 6 pack coming right up there WM. Let me know how you like it, although not all together sure why I owe it to you, but since I like you and Billy I'd buy you guys a cold one anytime. And sorry about the blasting off out here. I just hate it when 1. they come on here anonomous and 2. they spout off about things before they know the facts. At least I had enough sense to say no comment and wait until I either learned more about it or it just went away. So Royce is a good parody writer, as are you and Diva and 'Observer' is just some jerk who won't provide any identity.
Wild Man - October 07, 2003 - Report this comment
Any post we don't recognise is probably a spammer, just like One's guy, and the Decade police. Please, I do not wan't to leave this site in disorder & chaos. I say we all drink a beer and get over it already. I bring you all a case of Bud when I get back. Now I'm staring up the Harley and riding AWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY. Going to Daytona to Party & Relax!
Guy DiRito - October 07, 2003 - Report this comment
OK, WM. You are correct. I just don't like these interlopers getting into our discussions and stirring things up. Every once in a while I get to unload on them. If they want in on a family dispute then they have to be accepted into the family otherwise they can hit the bricks.

I am quite done now and feel much better. You go and have yourself a great time. Take care of yourself.
Michael Pacholek - October 08, 2003 - Report this comment
Observer: Give 'em enough rope, and they might realize it's made of hemp and start smokin' it.
Royce Miller - October 08, 2003 - Report this comment
Since I'm the one who wrote this little ditty, could I be afforded the last word? I appreciate your honesty, Wild Man, and here's mine-a name like Wild Man does give me the impression that you can both dish it out and take it. And as far as people commenting under assumed names, like Observer, I understand the need for that since after all, it is the comment that needs to be noticed, not the person making it. I got offended on this site myself once or twice, but when I thought it over, I realized I was being petty. So, Amiright has been a study in human character to me, my own and others'. Best wishes to one and all.

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