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Song Parodies -> "Crack In Rosie"

Original Song Title:

"Crackin' Rosie"

Original Performer:

Neil Diamond

Parody Song Title:

"Crack In Rosie"

Parody Written by:

Merry & Pippin

The Lyrics

This is M&P parody #400. Hope you like it, we did. It is conceived from the long-standing urban myth that the line "store-bought woman" meant something kinky...
Aww, crack in Rosie, can’t ignore
Come dawning’s light, my complaint, it sure does show
Leakin’ so slow
Restore, that’s the go
Damn! There’s no sign of my ‘cycle ‘pair kit

Glitch in love and I complain
Dame loving cheer has a tear, she’s had the gong
Maybe my prong’s
Up-swing went all wrong
No means for appease-ment, this man’s not a happy dude...

Though I rode my Rosie wild
Over-inflation made me happy
True, I am a plasti-phile
Stacked-up Rose was a store bought woman
Now she’s goin’ down, but there ain’t no hummin’
Demand me a re-fund
So long, my honey’s gone...

Plug her now
Plug her now
Plug her now, my baby

Crack in Rosie made me riled
Slap on a patch then I plow ‘er well that’s alright
’Cus wheezin’ is slight
Until my lance might
No guarantee for amassing ‘wear and tear’

Too far shoved my cruise missile
Don’t like the way you’re quickly flatt’nin’
’Cus I need you expansile
Shaglin’ Rose well you were quite buxom
Now as my play-thing your deflation sucks some
Concavin’ on me, girl
Your rotund days are gone

Faint hiss now
Faint hiss now
Faint hiss now: wind ‘scapin’

Crack in Rosie - she’s defiled
Girl ain’t convex and I glower, well that’s a plight
’Cus she’s not air-tight
Cause: overexcite
Stand and blaspheme at that lost aeration

Pop! Pop! Pop! Pop! Pop! Pop! Pop! ... etc
At the end of this week, Merry is moving cross-country. Mr President, we must not allow there to be...a 'parody-gap'. (Older readers may recognise where that comes from originally!). However, there may be a gap...gotta get net hooked up etc etc

The Song Parody Page of Merry & Pippin

The Song Recordings of Merry & Pippin

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 11

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   11

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Stan Hall - February 12, 2008 - Report this comment
Congrats on reaching the big 4-double-0 ... only five more than a hundred and a half to reach the magic number, but I'll give it to you now: 555 :-)
John Barry - February 12, 2008 - Report this comment
She's your plastic, crack-masticked lover. Congrats on 400. As one o' them older readers, I underSTANd your reference.
mandamoo - February 12, 2008 - Report this comment
How deflating ! Wow...400..congratulations :)
alvin - February 12, 2008 - Report this comment
my favorite of the day...too many brilliant lines to count....may you have a safe journey, merry
John Jenkins - February 12, 2008 - Report this comment
Very good substitutions. TMGLTM, but the "buxom/sucks some" rhyme stood out.
Bud Bundy - September 10, 2012 - Report this comment
Never heard that rumor about this song... stand-outs were "plasti-phile", "expansile", and the great sub, "Faint hiss now".

(if TV sitcom "Married... With Children" didn't make it across the Quator, Bud was an adolescent horndog whose inflatable woman popped out at inconvenient times, like when a real girl actually came up to his room.)
Peregrin - September 11, 2012 - Report this comment
Trust us, Bud. You made it down here. Kelly can stay, the rest of you can go back across the halfway line. Maybe Al could stay, he was sorta ok.

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