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Song Parodies -> "Undead By The Bite"

Original Song Title:

"Blinded By The Light"

Original Performer:

Manfred Mann

Parody Song Title:

"Undead By The Bite"

Parody Written by:

Phil Alexander

The Lyrics

Undead by the bite,
Howl up at the moon, another werewolf in the night
Undead by the bite,
By light of the moon, another vampire in flight
Undead by the bite,
The light of the moon, see those canine shining bright

Virgin smitten, bitten
By a weird were-kitten
With frightening feline fangs
In the morn, they'll be gorn
Only there From Dusk Till Dawn
For small mercies, give thanks

Night is colder, they get bolder
Looking years older
Hearing a screaming sound
And with a sneaking, a squeezing
A creaking and a-wheezing
The zombies come out of the ground

The zombies come out of the ground
But she was...
Undead by the bite,
One more on the loose, another vampaerrhoidal sprite
Undead by the bite,
It ain't no excuse for being ever so uptight
Undead by the bite,
A face that was puce, turning translucent and white
Undead by the bite,
Hopped up on the juice, and don't the smell of blood excite?
Undead by the bite..

And a vampire hunter
Says he'll tear her asunder
Swears that he got what it takes
He says "I'll get the bat
'Cause I know where it's at
Then I'll come back and eat me a steak

But the were-this, were-that,
Weirdo says no were-cat
Sure that it is safe outside
But that dire liar
May well be a vampire
And is taking us all for a ride

He's taking us all for a ride
He'll make us
Undead by the bite,
By the light of the moon
Another vampire in the night
Undead by the bite

But a vampire never gets tired
We've gotta make it through the night
We gonna make it through the night?

Vampire - look where the sun is
Vampire - you'll cook when the sun is
Vampire, you know you're gonna cook in the light of the sun
Vampire, that's where the fun is

Some stale mate, overweight
Unfortunate (Not your date)
Slayer from the east
Says, "Too late
Hit it while it's in that state
That's when they expect it least"

But some new-higher
Was singing like a choir
Watching the young girls' fright
And that bloodspeck, scheissdreck
Serious pain in the neck
Looking for someone to bite

And more zombies came out of the ground
They'll all be...
Undead by the bite,
Howl up at the moon, another minute through the night
Undead by the bite,
Growl up at the moon, another werewolf in sight

[First part:]
Undead by the bite,
Curl up in a cocoon to protect you from their sight
Undead by the bite,
Shows up with a spoon, another white knight rite to write
Undead by the bite,
Revved up a baboon, another silly rhyme tonight
Undead by the bite,
Held up until noon, a time to fight the righteous fight
Undead by the bite,
Blood in the room, another blunder - might cite fright
Undead by the bite,
Howls up at the moon, another goner in the night
Undead by the bite,
Burns up like a goon, another were-thing alight
Undead by the bite

[Second part (sung over first part above]:
Then at last a pasta
Staving off disaster
Starting to turn the tide
As it began, ya rang, yeah
Eating the lasagne
That had garlic inside

Silver bullet in his gullet
Trigger finger pull it
Werewolves all going down
And there ain't no mistaking
No faking, they're staking
Zombies back into the ground

Now Scott with a slingshot
Finally found a tender spot
And blows the vampire into bits
Now the sun's higher, sun's fire
Burn him on a vam-pyre
Beaten the beast with their wits

Some vampire hunter
From the lynching junta
Armed with his mis-stakes
He says "I'll get you too
Mr Nosferatu..."

She came round but she never got to bite
Got a mistake right...
..through the heart

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.9
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 22

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   1
 4   1
 5   20

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason. - May 10, 2006 - Report this comment
Fantastic, Philbo. One of the best [insert any category here] ever. (Where the hell *is* everyone these days?)
Arwen - May 10, 2006 - Report this comment
I liked so much of this that I can't even pick one thing...but you had me from the title, and I was smiling all the way through! Great job, Phil!!
Johnny D - May 10, 2006 - Report this comment
Bloody brilliant, Philbo Van Helsing. Welcome to the Blinded By The Light Club. The hostess will give you your official sunglasses. ;-)
Rick C - May 10, 2006 - Report this comment
Thrilling, chilling but, not over-Philling! What an excellent parody, Philbo! Perfect pacing and rhyming, seamlessly blended into a great story here. Especially liked the way you split out the vocal parts at the end. Highest Fives
Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd - May 10, 2006 - Report this comment
So many possible puns to use, I better stake some of them before they come alive in someone elses comment: You gett 555 extra lives. Here, have a bottle of sunblock, strength 555. Nothing about this parody is stale, mate! Etc. And kudos for the hidden Sci-Fi reference with "gorn", unless that one came to life accidentally. ;-)
Stephen Harrington - May 10, 2006 - Report this comment
555, a bloody good parody. ^____^
PMS - May 10, 2006 - Report this comment
Too many great lines to mention!
Phil Alexander - May 10, 2006 - Report this comment
:-D Fangs, everybody
JD - Van Helsing! I was trying to remember that name, but had no 'net connection at the time of writing to look it up.
Peter - no, I wasn't thinking of the Gorn (it was simply to stress the morn/dawn rhyme); though "From Dusk Till Dawn" was definitely an inspiration (
alvin rhodes - May 10, 2006 - Report this comment
excellent job on a mother of a song to pace
Stuart McArthur - May 10, 2006 - Report this comment
Brilliant stuff, Phil. That's amazing that you wrote this since that MB thread went up, as this would have to be the toughest OS - I've been trying to get a start on a "Blinded" parody for ages - loved "vampaerrhoidal" and I knew you'd get Nosferatu in there somewhere - 555
Bruce Springsteen - May 10, 2006 - Report this comment
Hey That's MY SONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Larry Hensley - May 10, 2006 - Report this comment
I vant to 555 this.
Phil Alexander - May 11, 2006 - Report this comment
Bruce - I think you'll find that you did a cover version...
Stuart - Thanks... I didn't really find it that bad, once I started: I had a couple of days of jotting ideas down while I was travelling, but it couldn't have taken more than two hours to write up while listening to the OS - mind you, that is a long time compared to most. The most difficult bit was trying to avoid self-plagiarism as I've done a few vampire/zombie parodies (and even one were-doe one ;-) ), and I do hate repeating myself. But most of all, I enjoy a challenge like this OS. Something to really get ones teeth into. So to speak.
Johnny D - May 11, 2006 - Report this comment
MrMacphisto - May 13, 2006 - Report this comment
LOL... best of the day
Red Ant - May 13, 2006 - Report this comment
Bruce Springsteen covered this? I thought he wrote it... anyway, this is excellent, Phil. A lot of great wordplay and rhymes, but "vam-pyre" was my favorite. I think this would do well in SOTM.
Phil Alexander - May 14, 2006 - Report this comment
Oops... yes, you're absolutely right: Bruce did do the original, and Manfred Mann's is the cover. That'll teach me to use only the first google link.. But having listened to it, the Springsteen version ain't anything like as good.
Chris Bodily TM - June 07, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Bloody good! Is it just a coincidence that I come up with a Nosferatu parody of "Desperado" only to find out that you beat me to it, and on the same day that I submit my parody, you enter your very Halloweeny parody into the May SOTM? You think fate is telling us something here? If it is, it's telling us that great minds do think alike. This is such a tough song to tackle, and your clever (if macabre) lyrics made it work! 555
Cat - June 09, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Wow. A Blinded By The Light parody is always really hard to tackle (even though I haven't done it yet, believe it or not...) and you chose an excellent topic and even, dare I said it, went one step further than Spaff's "Blind Dates Kind Of Bite" by varying every chorus line and doing the background singing! I can't imagine how much work went into this.
Agrimorfee - June 09, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Pretty damned good, intricately written for all the backing vocals, and the ever-changing choruses.
Red Ant - June 10, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) See above!
Rick C - June 14, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) A pleasure to re-visit.
Matthias - June 18, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTY) Winner!!!! Yes Song of the Year Winner!!!! This has to be the most amazing song I've ever read, at least in a long, long, long, long time!!!!
bobpiecheese - June 21, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Very original. Nothing like a healthy round of zombies to round off the SOTM contest.
Rex - June 23, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) This parody certainly sucked a 555 out of me!
Confission - June 24, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) darn vampires. good one
Johnny D - June 25, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) See above!
Max Power - June 26, 2006 - Report this comment
SOTM-Best one.
wannabemustangjockey - June 26, 2006 - Report this comment
SOTM - Ah yes, another BBTL parody... I even have one of these in the works these days (3 guesses what it's about!). Pacing is kind of odd (to me anyway) and you recycled a fair amount of the OS (to fairly good effect, I must admit) -- all this translates to ... umm... something. Hi.
Arwen - June 27, 2006 - Report this comment
SOTM...still totally dig it, Phil! I did an Undead parody once upon a time...and I really used to like it...but sitting next to the likes of this, it doesn't even hold a candle! EXCELLENT.
Stuart McArthur - June 28, 2006 - Report this comment
(SOTM) only two hours? *shakes head in admiration* that would've taken me at least a week! - loved "another white knight rite to write" and those vampires sure can be dire liars, can't they? (ya got that rite right) - classic Alexander
Steven (Parody Man) Ogle - July 03, 2006 - Report this comment
GR-E-E-E--E-A-A-A-T!!!!!!!!! - July 03, 2006 - Report this comment
Still fantastic, Philbo. One of the best [insert any category here] ever. Congrats.
Phil Alexander - July 06, 2006 - Report this comment
Many thanks, everybody. Especially to all those who voted for this in the SOTM :-D
Stu - it's not like it was two hours total: like a lot of these, I had the tune running round my head for a while, and thought up (and forgot, too.. brain's not what it used to be) lots of possible subs... for me, two hours to write it all up is quite a long time (I'm somewhere in excess of 60wpm, once I know what I'm writing).
Stuart McArthur - July 06, 2006 - Report this comment
I know what you mean, Phil - I do that too. But I meant that I'd type up all my accumulated ideas in a flurry (maybe an hour), then leave it until I've forgotten the whole thing, take a fresh look, get new ideas, toss out 90% of the first lines, then I repeat that process over a period of 2 weeks to 2 months, until the point where one day I revisit it, read the whole thing through without stalling on any phrase, and then it's ready to submit. I'm impressed that you manage to get yours so accomplished in the first 2-hour write, which you must do with your impressive strike-rate, and prolificness (is that a word?)
Rick C - March 30, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTY) One of my favorites of yours, Phil.
Below Average Dave - March 31, 2007 - Report this comment
(SOTY) Was this one a Halloween Parody? You killed Thanksgiving, excellent there, and you killed Halloween, you are quite the variety show buddy.

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