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Song Parodies -> "Help Me Mate With Gladys Knight"

Original Song Title:

"Help Me Make It Through The Night"

Original Performer:

Kris Kristofferson

Parody Song Title:

"Help Me Mate With Gladys Knight"

Parody Written by:

Kristof Robertson

The Lyrics

Well, after all the bitter recriminations, mudslinging and general approbation aimed at me for not doing this's my first (and probably last) KK parody. A note for trivia buffs...Gladys Knight also recorded this OS, which I didn't know until after I had written the parody (spooky, huh?) :-)
On a south-bound midnight train
Destination: Georgia, fine
She is waiting there for me
I heard it through the grapevine

Send the Pips out for some beers
Man, my chest is feeling tight
Lord, I hope you hear my pleas
Help me mate with Gladys Knight

Dionne Warwick, I have had
'Retha Franklin late last week
Three Supremes in my Jacuzzi
Left me unable to speak

Though I do not have the voice
Just the look of Barry White
We'll make out in her Rolls Royce
Then I'll mate with Gladys Knight

Gotta get her on her own (yes, I do!)
Gotta ditch the backing band
Coz a Pip-fuelled five-way orgy
Isn't something I had planned

Just like Stevie Wonder said:
All right, uptight, out of sight!
Brush those Pips out of the bed
While I mate with Gladys Knight

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   10

User Comments

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Paul Robinson - July 25, 2005 - Report this comment
That's a Pip of a parody, KR...5's ~ ~ ~
AFW - July 25, 2005 - Report this comment
This is great...and I'm Gladys heck to give ya' fives..
alvin rhodes - July 25, 2005 - Report this comment
best i've seen today...especially the title...5s
Adam Eccleshall - July 25, 2005 - Report this comment
Excellent :-D
Royce Miller - July 25, 2005 - Report this comment
Enjoyed it.
Rick C - July 25, 2005 - Report this comment
You are just a star-f***in' fool aren't you, Kristof? Ya got Cameron-D, the Supremes, 'Retha, Dionne, Catherine etc. Where the heck do you find the time to write???? 555 :-)
Johnny D - July 25, 2005 - Report this comment
The title had me laughing out loud for real, and the parody had me wishing I'd thought of it first!
Stuart McArthur - July 25, 2005 - Report this comment
Hey! will you lay off the Kris Kristofferson parodies already! Isn't it time you did a Neil Young one? So how come Kristof Robertson has never done a Neil Young one?

gee, you come up with some good title spins, KR. and extra LOLs for the Stevie Wonder line - 555
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - July 25, 2005 - Report this comment
So, you've finally done a KK parody? Gladys finally out of the way. ;)
Meriadoc - July 27, 2005 - Report this comment
Worth looking back a few days just to find this one...hilarious!

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