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Song Parodies -> "The Juggler"

Original Song Title:

"The Gambler"

Original Performer:

Kenny Rogers

Parody Song Title:

"The Juggler"

Parody Written by:

Royce Miller

The Lyrics

On a warm summer's evening
A guy came out of nowhere
He said he was a juggler, the kind that juggles hearts
So I took quite an interest and looked at him with wide eyes
He'd done so much juggling, it became his art

He said girl, I've made some fun
Out of pushin' people's buttons
And exercising power over their emotions true
So I juggle hearts like melons
As high as I can throw em
If you've got a minute, I will demonstrate for you

So I drank a shot of whiskey, this guy was so shifty
Then I waited for his show, I figured I could learn
How to spot a user, a callous mind abuser
Then he spewed out his b.s., as my anger burned

You got to know how to toss em
Know how to cross em
Know how to throw em high
Laugh when they crash down
You never stop your jugglin
Cause there's lots of hapless victims
But I'll end up old and lonely, when my jugglin's done

Every juggler knows there's lots of lonely people
Some of them you throw away, some you try to keep
If you wanna be a winner
Well then stay away from heartbreak
Stay away from guys like me, cause they'll make you weep

And when he finished talkin, he gathered up his toy balls
Put em in a burlap bag, and slung it cross his back
And I left a little wiser, what a weird adviser
But now I'll know a heartache when it's comin down the track

Repeat Chorus

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   4

User Comments

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mac - February 12, 2004 - Report this comment
Good job.
Phil Alexander - February 12, 2004 - Report this comment
Lovely, Royce: another one with more depth than the average parody.
Johnny D - February 12, 2004 - Report this comment
Claude Prez - February 13, 2004 - Report this comment
Not what I expected at all; I thought wow, even Royce wrote a Janet Jackson song. But it's not "The Jiggler", it's "The Juggler". And it's quite good.
Meriadoc - February 13, 2004 - Report this comment
An instructive parody! :-)
Royce Miller - February 15, 2004 - Report this comment
Claude-Thanks for your comments-I really was gonna write a Janet parody, but sort of fizzled out when I saw all the others; and they were all great.
Paul Wooten - February 16, 2004 - Report this comment
Very insightful and deep. Head over heels better than my dribble:) 555
Royce Miller - February 16, 2004 - Report this comment
Paul--Nothing like real life experience to make a person think
Peregrin - October 15, 2022 - Report this comment
Lovely. Insightful. R.I.P., Royce. When you left us, it was our heartache :(

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