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Song Parodies -> "Loco-motive Death"

Original Song Title:

"Locomotive Breath"

Original Performer:

Jethro Tull

Parody Song Title:

"Loco-motive Death"

Parody Written by:

Rick Duncan

The Lyrics

Now today's safety lesson, class.
At the railroad crossing
Waits locomotive death
Run the warning light flashing
You'll suck one last breath
You're in a giant hurry
You think you have it beat
You were so self important
Now you're just a big red stain
A stain on the street

You see the children playing there
At train tracks having fun
A woman and her old man
Get picked off one by one
Don't say you can't read English signs
There ain't no court in Hell
Gonna pay you any money
Or put flowers in remembrance
On the spot you fell

You hear that whistle blowing
You better heed its call
You won't be home for dinner
You won't be playing ball
Stop flattening those pennies
Don't be so obtuse
Or megatons will find you
And your brains won't stop going
Till the last caboose

When the train comes, they run the lights so red---They're going to be dead---when the train comes... Ha! Beat you to it.

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.0
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.3

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   1
 3   0
 4   0
 5   2

User Comments

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Johnny D - January 15, 2004 - Report this comment
DKTOS but since I like JT I wish I did...
Phil Alexander - January 15, 2004 - Report this comment
It was this song that originally got me into Tull - I've said it's got the only flute solo you can headbang to... I guess here's another road safety warning... nice one, Rick
Mari D - January 15, 2004 - Report this comment
Phil -- That explains the head injury. It happened while trying to hit myself over the head with my flute. Playing the instrument would have been the better choice. Rick and I do cover this tune (along with "Bourre," "Living in the Past" and "The Whistler.") in our act. Tull music is a trip to play (watch your head).
Paul Robinson - January 15, 2004 - Report this comment
Rick D - This one bleeds right into my gallows humor sensiblities and I loved the original song. Maybe you should put together a "Safety" themed parody medley? Just a haphazard and possibly dangerous thought. But seriously, isn't it amazing how many folks don't seem to understand basic physics even on a rudimentary level? I'm no Einstein but I can still recognize how poor my chances are up against a rumbling freight train. Mari D - Yes, the flute might not be the best "head-banging" instrument. They're probably too easy to damage. I'll leave you to guess whether it's "heads" or "flutes" I'm talking about.
Adagio - January 15, 2004 - Report this comment
DKTOS, but good, if grisley subject.

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