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Song Parodies -> "The Plunder of Ewes"

Original Song Title:

"The Wonder of You"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Elvis Presley

Parody Song Title:

"The Plunder of Ewes"

Parody Written by:

TJC

The Lyrics

~ Don't know the OS? A nice ‘Wonder of You’ MIDI here ~~ Has anyone really considered the animal's point of vi'ewe in all these 'sheepodies' of late?
When Am I Writers ‘do’ trans-species
{Oh, Oh Oooovine!}
For every genus they ‘score’ songs
So why’s it always ‘shimmied’ chamois?
{Oh, Oh Oooovine!}
When “Wham-bam, Thank-you Lamb’s” so wrong!

Damn your ‘sheepish’ guys
Their Shepard’s ‘pies’
And Pasture-geysing dudes
Makes me chunder…
This plunder of ewes!

So Mr. Barry, we say, “Scr’ewe you!”
{Oh, Oh Oooovine!}
Damn Turtle’s ‘ManDates’ – they’re a crime!
Hay, Airfarce, M & P and Alvin
{Oh Oh Oooovine!}
Ewe’ve fleeced-our-flocks—we’re ‘Mad’ Ovine

And so we'll catch anthrax
To whack Man’s ‘sacks’
So choose a muse that moos
Or be sundered…
For plunder of ewes!

~
{Instrumental with Bighorn Choir’s background ‘Ohooo’s’:
Oh, Oh Oooovine!,
Why not Porcine?!,
Or fly Bovine?!}
~

I guess I’ll never know
Just what 'gave rise'
To rhyme-o-reaming ewes
Been so plundered—
You’d think we were J’ewes!

~
~ Wild hoof stomping brings Dolly back out on stage to reprise a final verse ~
~

Damn Am I Writers, see
I’d rather be
The mutton in your stew
Than be plundered
By Kristof or Stu!

~
~ More wild hoof stomping to classic Elvis 'traveling music', followed by unmistakable sounds of stropping to a razor’s edge of fine Australian rapier… wit ~
~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Through the grapevine, I've heard the Bighorns have put out a f'ewe contracts...

~~ Tony Sheeprano’s Hit List ~~
(a partial, l’ewe’garithmically growing compendium... sorry if I've missed anyone!)

~~~~~~~~~

John Barry ~ ewe’ve at least eight transgressions:
1. "Found Out About Ewe,"
"Found Out About You,"
2. "I'm Cookin' Spelt 'n' Ewe,"
"I Put a Spell on You
3. Bo Peepian Ram Knows Sheep,"
"Bohemian Rhapsody
4. "Blue By Ewe,"
"Blue Bayou,"
5. "If Not for Ewe,"
"If Not for You,"
6. "Missed, Shot Four Ewe,"
"If Not for Ewe,"
7. "I Popped an Elk and Ewe,"
"I Put a Spell on You,"
8. "I've Gotta Tell My Ewe,"
"I Put a Spell on You,"


Tommy Turtle ~ ewe’ve at least six transgressions:

1. Back In The Ewe A*s, Us Are
Back In The U.S.S.R.
2. I Lie With Sheeps Tonight
The Lion Sleeps Tonight
3. Sheep Love You
She Loves You
4. Sheep: Care, Ovine
Sweet Caroline
5. A Shepherd Am I
American Pie
6. Have You Got Bleating On Your Mind?
Woman, Woman


Airfarcewon ~ ewe’ve at least four transgressions:

1. "Breaking In The Sheep,"
"Bringing In The Sheaves,"
2. "Two Sheepy People,"
"Two Sleepy People,"
3. "Till There Was Ewe,"
"Till There Was You,"

4. "You Made Me Love Ewe,"
"You made me love you,"


Merry & Pippin ~ ewe’ve at least tewe transgressions:

1. "Cows, Ewes, Mules Too,"
"How Do You Do?,"
2. "Nice to Be with Ewe,"
"Nice to Be with You


TJC ~ Butt one transgression, though, like Jimmy Carter, I’ve transgressed often ‘in my part’:

"I Get No Clicks Out Of Ewes!,"
"I Get A Kick Out Of You!," Frank Sinatra / Cole Porter


Alvin Rhodes~ ewe’ve transgressed at least once:

"Dirty Deeds Done With Sheep,"
"Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap


Others ~ n’ewe’merous transgressions:

1. "The Ditto Sheep Can't Fight," William Tong
"The Lion Sleeps Tonight," The Tokens
2. "No one Cares (About Sheep)," Kieran Hayde & Heather Godwin
"All You Wanted," Michelle Branch
3. "Lullaby of the Sheep," Conrad MacRoberts
"Lullaby of the Leaves," Joe Young/Bernice Petkere
4. "Something Sheepish," Brian Damaged
"Something Stupid," Frank Sinatra & Nancy Sinatra
5. "One Sheep," S.T.G.
"One Thing," Finger Eleven
6. "Dirty Deeds (Done With Sheep)," Me
"Dirty Deeds (Done Dirt Cheap)," AC/DC
7. "Sneakin' Up On Sheep," Rick Duncan
"Bringing In the Sheaves," Trad.
8. "Revenge of the Sleep Sheep," Starlette Victory
"Who Needs Sleep?," Barenaked Ladies
9. "It Don't Matter To Sheep," Tim Mayfield
"It Don't Matter To Me," Bread
10. "The Whitest Sheep Are Tight," Malcolm Higgins
"The Lion Sleeps Tonight," The Tokens
11. "20000 Sheep," Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd
"20000 Feet," Saxon
12. "Boulevard of Broken Sheep," Crazy T
"Boulevard of Broken Dreams," Green Day
13. "Tryst With The Sheep," Red Ant
"Kiss From A Rose," Seal
14. "Yes, I Did Molest A Sheep," Paul Robinson
"Sad and Deep as You," Dave Mason
15. "All the Sheep Will Scream," MrMacphisto
"I Don't Sleep, I Dream," R.E.M.
16. "Where The Sheeps Have Lo Mein," Malcolm Higgins
"Where The Strets Have No Name," U2
17. "I Want Ewe," Paul Wooten
"I Want You," Bob Dylan
18. "If You Fall (In Love With Ewes)," PMS
"If I Fell," The Beatles
19. "I Only Want to be With Ewes," Sheep Trick
"I Only Want to be With You," Dusty Springfield
20. "Me And Ewes And a Hog or Two," Sheep Trick
"Me And You And a Dog Named Boo," Kent Lavoie
21. "Wishing Ewes Were Here," Malcolm Higgins
"Wishing You Were Here," Chicago
22. "(Now That Ewe's Gone) The Abandoned Foal Song ," Malcolm Higgins "Band Of Gold ," Freda Payne
23. "Baby's A Ewe," Malcolm Higgins
"Baby It's You," The Beatles

~



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AFW - October 08, 2007 - Report this comment
Fan(Freakin')tastic!...an epic of amazing and masterful proportions...It almost makes me have to check into rehab, to imagine the work this took..just the research alone boggles the keyboard!..I do hereby, nominate you for the Baa-cademy award..
TJC - October 08, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks AF! I was a bit taken a baaaaack at the shear n'ewemerousness of these sheepodies! Oh, and I notice that somehow my intro got cropped... should'a said: "Sung by Dolly the Cloned Sheep, in support of her species... Oh, and the last line was originally "Than be plundered, 'down under' by Stu"... but wasn't quite sure how he'd take it, so opted for non-rhyming, less 'targeted' line with Kristof!
Guilty Turtle - October 08, 2007 - Report this comment
Make it seven.... Ewe turned OS into a baagnificent ewepic... loved the added stage directions and endless subs of title morpheme ("J'ewes = ROFL) - "Sheeprano" lol--. This directory should be maaandatory reading for all new writers! Fiiiiive, Fiiiiiive, Fiiiiiive.....

oh, btw, Stuart McArthur would have *loved* your proposed ending, if I daaaare say so. Stu is a good sport --- ya outta see what he and TT did to each other a while back :-)
alvin - October 08, 2007 - Report this comment
like the way ya plundered the song...i may have written some cow songs as well
TT - October 08, 2007 - Report this comment
that was supposed to be "newe" writers, of course)
Much better MIDI than those I had found. In answer to the question in the bridge, there's a "rural legend" (as opposed to "urban legend" that a sheep's thing feels even better than a heweman female's... hay, aren't the most expensive condoms made of lambskin? -- so must be true. As the state motto says, "Idaho: Where men are men, and sheep are nervous".
Congrats on becoming master of the genus ... uh, genre.
MrMacphisto - October 08, 2007 - Report this comment
"Wham bam thank you lamb" was great... lol... 5-5-5
TJC - October 08, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks guys for the kind comments and votes... and TT... regarding the urban/rural legend... I think that the most expensive condom is (drum roll)... the one that breaks! And regarding the MIDI... seemed pretty good to me... I'll bet someone who knows what they're doing could edit it to meet their needs (ie, including the last verse, bumping the melody, etc.)... but then I guess you'd have to be savy enough to host it yourself... something to consider/research Thanks!
Kristof Robertson - October 09, 2007 - Report this comment
Damn Am I Writers, see I’d rather be
The mutton in your stew
Than be plundered
By Kristof or Stu!

I resemble that remark!! I'm sure I speak for my compadre Mr McArthur as well, when I state categoricaaly that we DON'T shag sheep in Australia (unless they buy dinner...:-D). Great stuff buddy. 555
stuart mcarthur - October 09, 2007 - Report this comment
Don't give me that, Kristof! - you know that I know there was a very cute little ewe in West Wyalong (by the name of Baaaaaaabara) near where you grew up, and those rumours can't ALL be untrue...

brilliant idea and brilliant parody TJC, and believe me, at my age, I can't even be bothered taking offence at the offensive, let alone this inspired cackfest - 555
TJC - October 09, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks Kristof (lol 'buy dinner)' & Stu (lol 'Baaaaaabara)'... and I was only referring to 'plunder' in terms of mining 'ewes' for parody material!
Tommy To Stuart - October 09, 2007 - Report this comment
Darn, Stu, was hoping you could be bothered to take offense at "Back In The Ewe A*s, Us Are", but it only Krissed off ... I mean, pi**ed off... half of its intended audience...
(TJC, thanks for letting me borrow your page. Told ya Stuart woulda loved the proposed ending!)
TJC - October 10, 2007 - Report this comment
TT... ewe were right... as usual!
Fiddlegirl - September 17, 2009 - Report this comment
Will we see this case soon on "The Sheeple's Court"? :D
TC to FG - September 20, 2009 - Report this comment
Or at least on Judge Stchuupner's! Thanks for checking!
Peregrin - August 10, 2012 - Report this comment
Awww! TJC! I'm disappointed you missed M&P's parody that may have started it all! "Sheepster". Loved the parody though :)
TJC's ATTorney - August 11, 2012 - Report this comment
Peregrin: The a-mount of research that wool-d have been required, among so many authors -- and he did say "at least". Really, Sir, thine offence is misplaced -- it should be in the fence,. where the sheep's head is stuck.

Seriously -- can you document that "Sheepster" was the first? If so, please PM, email, or otherwise make more public than my semi-retired client's excellent, if not highly visible, parody.


@ TJC: You're quite welcome for the "referral" that brought Peregrin here, along with his $555. My contingency fee for that will be, as usual (hits calculator) $444. Like most clients of attorneys, you get the 111 that's left. x-D
Peregrin - August 11, 2012 - Report this comment
To TT: No I cannot! I mean, I COULD document it, but unlike the way lots of people deal with stuff these days (not referring to here) I will say only this: Saying it doesn't make it so". It was butt a ram shackle comment!

It may have been the first, I don't know how one would tell...? I was Three sheeps to the wind when I made my statement

Absolutely no offence was taken! I was giving Sheepster the shout out that it missed out on! There's another one, ha ha.

Head stuck in fence, I know where that's going. Backs to the wall! With shear determination I jump into my lamb-orghini and leave...
Lawyer Or Leave Her @ Peregrin - August 15, 2012 - Report this comment
Sorry that came off (heh) as a lawyerly counter-attack. Actually, many of us (well, a fewe of us) would LOVE to see if, in fact, ewe tewe are the guilty parties who started this sheep-fest, so that we know wheweme to sewe, prosecewete, et cet'ra!

(really -- credit would be gladly given, if in fact yours popped the ovine cherry, so to speak. It would take a bit of searching, and not all sheepodies have "ewe" or "sheep" or any form thereof in the title, as in "I Lamb... I Said", or "A Shepherd Am I" -- ok, those both came later, but same with what came before you did, so to speak.)

Also serious about not taking offense -- TJC arrived later than you did, undoubtedly missed "Sheepster", and it most surely deserves the shout-out here. It also deserves a response from the also-rarely-seen-these-days man himself, and I am off to email him thusly!
Peregrin - August 15, 2012 - Report this comment
I await the feedback! :)
Meriadoc - August 15, 2012 - Report this comment
I would have guessed that Malcolm was the original sinful shepherd...

As for Sheepster, I think Cows Ewes etc predated that...?
TJC - August 16, 2012 - Report this comment
M&P: Wow! No worries! 5 years later...the stat'ewe't of in-it'tations is, well, UP! And sorry about missing 'Sheepster'... I can only plead no ho cuntendre! And TT RIDER: Thanks for the shout out and blast to to da past. After all these years I still recall my *fav* in this hole genre: ' Back in the Ewe's Ass Us Are'' (or something quite similar) by none other than TT!
Tommy Turtle - August 17, 2012 - Report this comment
TJC: LOL @ the Latin -- and would that *all* of them were tender! ... also lol @ "tt rider"; TUVM for the citation, and if ewe would like the exact, not similar, it's #1 in your list of accusations, charges, and indictments against this writer, a/k/a "The Plunderer". ;)

Meriadoc: MH? ... and he never got properly "credited" (blamed?) for it while still among us. There's some sort of lesson there, but I'm not sure what it is, as the credit/blame issue is still a bit ambig(horn)ewe-'us. ;)
    I tried to do a Startpage search for the keywords amiright cows ewes, but without an exact title, couldn't find it. Correct title, please, or just a link to song or to author's page, for chronology purposes? (This is soooo important!

I tried to speed-read Malcolm's page -- no easy feat with a guy who oft posted 10/day; hence, only the first 1500 or so -- from the beginning to your 2004 post. Nothing that pointed to sheep-shagging jumped off the page.

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