Well, I tried to make it run day,
But the snowbank got depressed.
It's a sunlight but no-fun day,
Because I'm summertime-dressed.
The terrain I have just altered;
I'm aggrieved because my hind
Made a snowman indenture, the back-end kind.

Well, my keister's sinkin' down bruised. . .
Sitzmark-molded chair. Unwise
Was it to try triple-X schussed.
Can with the pole, can I prise?
I feel poorly and despondent--
Not just boots be in a bind:
Butt I have piste-reamed;
I'm pissed, my screech ain't kind.

In a seat here, and I've settled
With my feet up in the air.
I don't love this, and I'm nettled,
My plump rump in a snow lair.

Well I tried to shake it,
But in ice it's stayin'.
Wish I could bake it.

Well, my keister's stinkin', brown-oozed. . .
Sitzmark-molded chair. I tries
To melt moguls that I down schussed--
Can aroma starts to rise.
Out is pouring mal emollient:
I'm stool-loosened from the bind. . .
An insurance stream;
I'm piste-pissed but don't mind.

Folks won't ski here--they're nose-nettled;
They sense feces in the air.
There's a brown breech where I'd settled;
They know. . .not dumped by a bear

The moral: to shake it,
Butt, when in ice stayin',
Ya gotta take sh*t.

Doo, ahh! Poo, ahh!
Poo, ahh! Doo, ahh!. . .