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Song Parodies -> "Orlando (FL) (ABBA Hall Of Fame Induction Tribute, Vol. II)"

Original Song Title:

"Fernando"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

ABBA

Parody Song Title:

"Orlando (FL) (ABBA Hall Of Fame Induction Tribute, Vol. II)"

Parody Written by:

Fiddlegirl and Tommy Turtle

The Lyrics

Continiung the tribute to ABBA's Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction today (March 15) with a *very* different point of view from AFW's take on TOS by the same name. Who would ever have thought that lovely orange groves could be destroyed by an infestation of mice?

OS video with good text lyrics here.


Are you near, McKludge: Orlando?
I remember long ago some pretty orange groves, not this
Nearly overnight, Orlando --
-- Made a suburb by themselves, did Disney™, coming from afar
You can hear Matthias: "Bums!" --
Lake Buena Vista: laws, Walt Disney was their czar [1]

Universal™, now, Orlando
From the Tower, each ride in it screams of vast pull: gravity [2]
TT: gf made, Orlando [3]
She was strong; athletic life; but work for Mouse would make her cry
And it's sad, but true to say
The roar of cars; the traffic; small town went bye-bye

There was just a crossroads there, before
Big citrus store, Orlando
They would process lots of orange juice
Grape-fruit, produce; Orlando
Though tour-ism got a giant boost
There's some regret
But if Magic Kingdom™ came again
And big bucks, spend: expand-o
We would prob'ly do the same again
Not fight the trend, Orlando

Now there's tolls. free-ways, Orlando
Been many years since Disney came and rifled all the land
Ev'ry tourist comes: Orlando [4]
Do you still recall that fateful time the city, new, was planned?
Then we fin'lly realized
How shrouded were the sights of Disney and his band

There are insects in the air at night
Mosquitos bite, Orlando
There are thuderstorms through summer, fall
Each ev'ning, squall, Orlando [5]
There's a port nearby from where ships cruise [6]
Rockets launch, yet [7]
And sometimes a hurricane makes land
But weakened: sand, Orlando [8]

That was something of a boom, ignite
Its star was bright, Orlando
Then a fright'ning bust next decade, see
In seventies, embargo [9]
Disney never thought that they could lose
Recover? Bet.
It will always have its fame; Mouse: lend
Wish: SeaWorld™, end, Orlando [10]

Yes, it'll never be the same again
Old days, at end, Orlando

[old days long since faded; quality of life faded; song fades with it]




[1] Under a lot of fake names, Disney bought up huge tracts of groveland and vacant land in the 1960s, set up their own "municpal taxing district", and, for all practical purposes, owned and governed an entire town. At first called the City of Reedy Creek, it was later renamed Lake Buena Vista. "Buena Vista" comes from the name of the street in Burbank, California, where The Walt Disney Company is located. Talk about "company towns" ... frequent allegations of favoritism, etc., as bad as any coal-mining "company town", and Disney had power far beyond other tourist attractions.

[2] Universal Studios' Orlando theme park slogan: "Go to Disney for the sights; come here for the rides." They're not kidding. (Like, say, being accelerated upward like an astronaut in the Space Shuttle, then being dropped six or seven stories in free-fall.)

[3] McKludge never did answer TT's question, at TJC's Mouseterpiece, whether his gf and TT's former were the same person. ;)

[4] Always ranked among the most popular tourist destinations in the world; at times, #1. More theme parks and entertainment attractions than anywhere else in the world.

[5] Old joke: Iowa (Central US state) was searching for a new state slogan to attract business and tourists to the largely-agricultural state. One prankster submitted "Iowa -- Centrally located between two oceans". (1500 mi/2500 km in each direction, ha ha)

Meteorology: "Orlando: Centrally located between two bodies of very warm water".
(Atlantic and Gulf of Mexico, with the even warmer Gulf Stream Current flowing alongside both coasts.)
When the warm, moist air currents from those two meet in the middle, BANG! .. and guess where "the middle" is?

Result: The *most* thunderstorm days of any major city in the world, averaging more than 100 days/year with thunderstorm activity. Lightning is frequent. (Far more people are killed by lightning than by sharks, but which scares more people, asks the shark-friendly turtle?)
Locals visit the parks in the late spring or late fall, avoiding the summer weather and crowds, and the winter escapees from the frigid North.

[6] Port Canaveral, less than an hour from the airport. Many cruise ships, including gambling ships. Although gambling is a terrible evil on land (except when the State runs it, as in Lotto) it is magically purged by going beyond the twelve-mile limit.

[7] Also about an hour away: Cape Canaveral Air Force Station, home of unmanned rocket launches from the 1950s through the present day, and home of the Mercury/Gemini/Apollo missions that eventually sent men to the Moon and back. Later, Kennedy Space Center was built a little northwest of that complex, the launch point (and desired landing point, weather permitting) of the Space Shuttle.

[8] The city itself is about 42 miles (68 km) from the Atlantic, and farther from the Gulf. Hurricanes weaken as they cross, first, the barrier islands on either coast, then, the land between the coast and the inland cities. There are hurricanes there, but with less frequency and lower intensity than at coastal areas -- one factor that influenced Disney not to locate the park in the more-developed and -accessible (at the time) cities of Miami (Atlantic coast) or Tampa (Gulf Coast).

[9] The Arab oil embargoes of the 1970s, a protest against US policy in the Mid-East, drove the price of oil from two or three dollars a barrel to almost $40/bbl. Retail gasoline prices nearly quadrupled between 1969 and 1981. Since many of Florida's tourists arrive by car, the industry was devastated as travelers were afraid, not only of the price, but of shortages and not being able to find gasoline en route, or to have to wait in long lines.
As a result, Disney stock, which had soared from the late 60s to the early 70s, crashed dramatically, and wouldn't recover until well into the 1980s.

[10] Recent headline: "Killer Whale Kills Trainer At SeaWorld". Say it with us: "D'oh!"...
Did they think the name "Killer Whale" was a joke? What did they expect?
Something in TT doesn't like the idea of taking a creature that roams a thousand miles or more (sometimes visible right past his beach, when he's lucky) and penning it up in something the size of a closet, relatively speaking. You wanna see marine life, learn scuba or just go snorkeling.

Calvin: "Mom wants to know if we want to go to the zoo."
Hobbes (the toy tiger): "Ask her if we can tour a prison afterwards."
(Calvin tells Mom, no.)

"Calvin and Hobbes" © Bill Watterson. Trademarks belong to all those guys with the ™ by their names. All else © 2010 Fiddlegirl and Tommy Turtle. All rights reserved. E-mail: tomm...@yahoo.com

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Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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Patrick - March 15, 2010 - Report this comment
"Fernando" is my favourite ABBA song. You have produced quite a history and economics lesson from it. I'll probably never make it to Orlando, but I have been to Marceline, Missouri and seen the tree Walt Disney used to dream under. It's basically a giant stump, knocked down by lightning. But there is a new tree grown from it. (Lightning, cloning). Disney's first studio is in a very run-down neighborhood in Kansas City, Missouri. There have been a few attempts to stabilize it, but it looks like it could collapse in a strong wind gust. That non-descript pile of bricks is where Walt first befriended the pet mouse that would later become Mickey. It deserves at least a bronze plaque, but I can't see out-of-state tourists flocking there. Most of the time you don't see people at all in that neighborhood.
Matthias - March 15, 2010 - Report this comment
It's like being back home (and by home I mean a place that feels like my home after spending about a year of my life there and making some fantastic friends, but I'm really from Cleveland, Ohio. Would love to see you do one about Cleveland too...). I learned a lot about my favorite city and reflected on a lot of the fantastic references you put in such as Universal Studios, and the Magic Kingdom, especially Lake Beuna Vista because I actually lived there. (Not to mention it was great to see my named referenced in a song)
Matthias - March 15, 2010 - Report this comment
Also I don't know if you've read my Disney Slave parody but you should: http://www.amiright.com/parody/2000s/christinaaguilera63.shtml
Old Man Ribber - March 15, 2010 - Report this comment
ABBA - Daba Doo! ;D
Mark Scotti - March 15, 2010 - Report this comment
Mickey would like to change the song to that!
McKludge - March 15, 2010 - Report this comment
Near? I'm smack dab in the middle of it. Thanks for the callout, FG and TT. You clearly must have spent some time in O-Town with all the references you made. I've been here since 1985, and I know of several orange groves that are now residential and commercial developments

Sorry, I missed the question from the previous parody. If her name started with a J, then maybe.

Although I though Tampa had more lightning strikes per year than Orlando.
Turtle Yacks n' Bow-tox Afficianado - March 15, 2010 - Report this comment
To quote that famous Floridian Uber-Rodent with a magnetic personality (Mickey Gauss), "You're Grando!"
Patrick - March 15, 2010 - Report this comment
I liked your comments on "Barack". Hope you looked up the original. By the way, what is "pacint"?
Fiddlegirl - March 15, 2010 - Report this comment
Thanks, all!

Patrick: I went to college near KC, but didn't realize when I was there that I was so close to Disney history... what do you know?

Matthias: Cleveland? Did you make it to the R&R Hall of Fame for the induction ceremonies? ;) [It's a fabulous museum.]

OMR: LOL!

Mark Scotti: Oh, Mickey, he's so fine... (sorry-- I get carried away) ;)

McKludge: No doubt several miles of pretty citrus groves have been cleared away over the years... :(

TWBA: Ewe are tewe kind! (Don't people go fishing for Marlin Grand-o down in Florida?) ;)

@ Patrick: "pacint" just means that TT can't type worth a flip(per). Translation: "Pacing". ;)

@ TT: Boy, have *you* got peeps buffaloed! LOL :)
Starstruck - March 15, 2010 - Report this comment
Great Job Fiddlegirl and Tommy Turtle! 5 stars. It's so true about how it's getting over built! Nicely done.
Phil Nelson - March 15, 2010 - Report this comment
I think it's cool that Genesis are finally gonna be in the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame. Anyway, another Disney themed parody! Funny. I've been there a few times recently. Good stuff.
Tommy Turtle - March 15, 2010 - Report this comment
Patrick: Interesting history. From the description, though, it's hardly surprising that it's not a tourist Mecca ;)

Matthias: Sorry, from a previous comment, thought you still worked there. Can't see Cleveland as having the same appeal, and the element of personal knowledge is lacking. However, TWOTEF references Cleveland, and TT punned on that -- does that count? If we're swapping plugs, it's
http://www.amiright.com/parody/70s/gordonlightfoot78.shtml

Old Man Ribber: You and Dan Creeden got ESPN today? ;) (his comment @ other parody)

Mark Scotti: Somehow, I doubt it... just a gut instinct. ;)

McKludge: The orange grove ref was to what was there before "the infestation of mice" (intro), i. e. Mickey and Minnie, well before your time there. (Don't worry, apparently FG didn't read the intro TT wrote, either. ;)
          Nix on (lol) the J, so you're not getting sloppy seconds -- what a relief, eh? ;) ... the lightning stats were from feeble memory; I'd have to look them up, but the reasoning is sound: Coastal warm waters are still cooler in summer than the temps inland -- say, 85F on the water and 95F in O-town. So you have "relatively" cooler air above the water. Air flows from cold (high pressure) to warm (low pressure) .Land heats up more quickly than water, and hot air rises, so during the day, the center of the state develops a "thermal low" (from all that hot air headed skyward like a balloon). So mini-"cold" fronts move in from each coast. When they meet the warmer air and uplift it, the vertical (cumulus) clouds are formed, just as when a cold front moves down from Canada, and the result is thunderstorms. .... TMI, right? ;)
          As for inside info, although I don't give much personal info on the Net, this parody spilled the beans, within, depending on the weather, 50-100 miles or so:
http://www.amiright.com/parody/misc/williamshakespeare3.shtml.
Cheers.

Turtle Yacks n' Bow-tox Afficianado: LOL @ Gauss! (FG probably thinks he's a composer, but LOL @ her question).

Patrick II: Replied there. Thought everyone knew about the flippin' typo problem (Preview! We need a "comment preview" window!), but fortunately, I have my faithful translator, which is good, since turtles can't speak.

FG: I get the point (subtle -- very subtle! ;), but see above -- no preview in comments, and thought typos were part of the perzonxa.

Starstruck: Thanks! Coastal towns are now being called "bedroom communities" -- what does that say?

Phil Nelson: I DK that Bible books were eliglible.... btw, refuse to give your thumbprint if you buy a multi-day pass. They'll fuss, but they'll let you in. (Once it's recorded, anyone can steal it and use it.)
Phil Nelson - March 15, 2010 - Report this comment
Of course I mean the band (I assume you know too). Good advice on the pass, I've always gotten one day passes before
AFW - March 15, 2010 - Report this comment
Top job, Guys...and thanks for the link mench
Christie Marie M - March 15, 2010 - Report this comment
I've looked at AFW's link of the same subject and like I said to him, reminds me of our 18 hour road trips to Florida. We're going next month. I also have a friend working in Disney and loved it. A fresh -squeezed parody. Here's some bright and sunny 5's
Tommy Turtle - March 16, 2010 - Report this comment
Phil Nelson: Vaguely aware that there is a band by that name, but yeah, was kidding.

AFW: Thanks.... TTends to avoid re-doing a title switch that's been done before, unless the spin was *very* different. So while I'll confess to a teensy twinge of disappointment that you beat us to it, it was so totally different in point of view -- and a great job, worthy of the plug.

Christie Marie M: Bright and sunny thanks! A day without parody is like a day ... I don't drink orange juice, actually.... like a day without seaweed!
McKludge - March 16, 2010 - Report this comment
@ TT - Are you a Brevard County turtle? I used to be a co-op student (basically and intern) for NASA at Kennedy Space Center. Got lucky enough to watch a night launch of the Shuttle standing right outside the VAB. Can't beat that.

We could both be right about thunderstorms and lightning. I'm 99% certain that Tampa is the lightning capital of the US (most strikes per year), but Orlando still could have more days per yer containing thunderstorms. Those are two different data points.
UnKnownVotrix - March 16, 2010 - Report this comment
^ < ~ ~ ~ ~ Lord McLewd, I've rather assumed all along that you were a " Night Launcher" indeed, sir ! !
Tommy Turtle - March 16, 2010 - Report this comment
McKludge: Quiz question: Where is the most significant area for loggerhead sea turtle nesting in the Western Hemisphere, and the most significant area for green turtle nesting in North America, representing 25-35% of all loggerhead and green sea turtle nests in the US?

A friend did contract work for NASA and so had a pass. I envy you both. I can watch them from my balcony, much farther away, but still spectacular - and no fighting the traffic and crowds to get to the public viewing places.

True about the two different data points (spoken in true geek-ese!) Wikipedia lists some areas around the globe with higher rates of *strikes*, but says of the US, "In the US, Central Florida sees more lightning than any other area. For example, in what is called "Lightning Alley", an area from Tampa, to Orlando, there are as many as 50 strikes per square mile (about 20 per km²) per year."

So perhaps the statistic that I vaguely remember (at my age, I remember everything "vaguely", even if it happened five minutes ago. Upside: Like the movie, "50 First Dates", I never get tired of the same girl or sheep.) had encapsulated "Central Florida" into "the Orlando area".

I don't immediately see anything about number of *days* of T-storm activity, which, after all, is what ruins one's long-planned vacation to the mostly-outdoor attractions. That might still be correct: more chance of your afternoon and evening being ruined on any given day.


UnKnownVotrix: ROFLMAO!!! Thanks for uproarious comment -- do you have one for co-author Fiddlegirl?
TT P.S. @ McKludge - March 16, 2010 - Report this comment
In case it wasn't clear, the parody referred to the *vast* amount of land that was vacant or agricultural in the 1960s, then built up by Disney. By the time you arrived in '85 (hey, that almost rhymes), the continued growth and removal of groves was only a small percentage of what that explosion did. Sorry if it wasn't clear.
McKludge - March 17, 2010 - Report this comment
If you're in the general area, we should grab a beer some weekend, TT. I'll shoot you an email at the address above sometime.

UKV, I'm not quite sure how to take your comment. I'd ask for clarification, but I think it would just lead down a rather dirty path...
Tommy Turtle - March 17, 2010 - Report this comment
McKludge: Hey, why should *I* have to pay the tolls, fight the traffic, etc. *You're* the one who chose to live there! ;) ;) ;)
          'Sides, I have a *beach*... and while J is welcome, if she's not part of the party, there are college girls running around dressed in dental floss for the rest of Spring Break. Bring binoculars. :-)

Not sure if UKV's comment was intended for thee, moi, or both of us, since TT is known for "occasional" l-ewe-d parodies, and perhaps UKV saw the linked parody about the Shuttle launch. But I know *exactly* how that comment was meant: Blast off! -- and hopefully, with more than a ten-second final countdown, LOL.

Side note: When the area grew enough to get its own telephone area code, they gave it "321", in honor of said countdowns. OK, but that's weak. Better: Give it area code 987, and give the Space Center the phone number 987-654-3210. (But they didn't ask me - go figure!

Looking forward to that e-mail and beer. Disclaimer: I can be even more obnoxious in person than on the net. (But wouldn't be!) :)
McKludge @ TT - March 18, 2010 - Report this comment
UKV comment was toward me, she's called me Lord McLewd in comments on some of my parodies.

Funny thing: 867-5309 (as in the song Jenny Jenny) is a valid phone number on Kennedy Space Center. I don't think it is active, but its valid. All their numbers start with 861 or 867, or at least used to.

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