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Song Parodies -> "Vegemite"

Original Song Title:

"Substitute"

Original Performer:

The Who

Parody Song Title:

"Vegemite"

Parody Written by:

Merry & Pippin

The Lyrics

It stinks, just like gritty mashed old leather
I think my shoes, they would taste better

But you like Vegemite and you spread it wide
We Yanks are appalled and we roll our eyes
The sandwich spread you eat is all yeast-icated
It looks pretty dumb, but your needs get sated, yeah

Vegemite's like tire black
You made me try it for a snack
I say I'll get me a heart attack
It's unleavened gloop, darling cut me some slack...

I must warn you I'm gagging soon - I might ralph..
On toast slice I now taste yeast, and this feast's like tasting grout
And now you dare to cook me some on rye
That spore-aphile nearness I decry
Feed me turpentine glop - I undermine
This quirk o' yours that all must Aussify, Aussify

Vegemite, sickly whim
Vegemite, with Coke again
Vegemite, it hurts my tum
It's beastly sh*t spread on a bun

Say of Vegemite "give another try"
I need alcohol 'cus my meal's awry
This dinner custom should be eradicated
My poor skittish tongue, it won't masticate it, yeah

I was left with a tacky swoon in my mouth
My poor slice of bread's basted with the yeast I'm tasting now
But now I dare to look 'cus I espy
With marmalade on ears, you spread it nigh
Sayin' "Stem your whine, gobble 'em, don't be shy
And check it out, there's more - spread it on my thighs, make me sigh..."

Vegemite, warm from tin!
Vegemite, we'll poke it in!
Vegemite, I'll start to hum..
It's neat, I'll get, at shopping, some...

Vegemite - just lie right back
I'll spread it on that tasty crack
May be alright, as anatomy snack
So finely you tout meally aide-de-climax

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 1

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 5   1
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User Comments

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alvin rhodes - May 23, 2004 - Report this comment
sickeningly funny....the skittish tongue not masticating was my favorite line...nice job...5s
Peregrin - May 23, 2004 - Report this comment
Methinks you must have put some Aussie allies offside, Merry! ;-0
Steven Cavanagh - May 23, 2004 - Report this comment
(unlurk) Nah. The american archetype that australians have concerning vegemite is a naive guy that spreads vegemite on three inches thick- it only needs a thin scraping. I recommend it thinly spread on toast and topped with poached or scambled egg. Absolutely beautiful.
The Thought Police - May 23, 2004 - Report this comment
Just how do you become "six-foot three,covered with muscles",while eating this stuff ?
The Klingon War Council - May 23, 2004 - Report this comment
We agree-this stuff goes great with Gahk !
mandamoo - May 24, 2004 - Report this comment
Who's been brushing up on '101 Uses For Vegemite'....hmm ??? ;-D I LOVE the stuff and I love this ! Well done !
Kristof Robertson - May 24, 2004 - Report this comment
Hey man..you can't fight the 'Mite!!! I grew up on this stuff (which would explain why I'm only 3ft 5")....I'm already preparing my diss on American gastronomic travesties!!! btw very funny and articulate as usual 555
Jonathan C. - May 25, 2004 - Report this comment
I might ralph! Golden! 3 fives.
Peregrin - May 25, 2004 - Report this comment
Kristof. I look forward very much to seeing your work. PLEASE bring it to our attention when you do so okay?
malcolm higgins - May 28, 2004 - Report this comment
is a vegemite anything like a sane mite?? he just sucks juice out of plants not people?? 5-5-5 you two whatever you ares
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - February 04, 2005 - Report this comment
Woah, that last bit certainly 'puts a rose on every cheek'. Funny stuff.

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