Original Song Title:
Parody Song Title:
"Please examine that which follows me"
Such as thoughts or lists: "A, B, C, D"
It shows sequent-
Means "Another thought's inside of this"
Interrupt yourself? Don't be remiss
Explain in these
Like... so: "George (the First)
"Was accursed by his (dim) son" 
Clar... i.... fy all doubt
Close it out: ) when you are done!
Here's a hint:
Got a thought that's slightly different?
Not enough for sentence separate
But linked up with
Preceding print? --
-- Se-mi...colon trick:
"I was sick; I couldn't work"
If... you.. "comma" here,
Like such a jerk! 
That it takes the place of "but" or "and"
Semicolon is at your command
No comma there;
It should be banned
And now your writing won't be bland....
 Singular: parenthesis; plural: parentheses. The square ones [ ] are brackets.
 This sentence didn't really need the parentheses; they were used to illustrate how a writer might have a thought, then decide she needed to clarify for the reader exactly which George (the first one) and which son (the dim one). A really involved example, or a parenthetical full sentence (they could be several sentences or even a parenthetical paragraph, but be judicious) would be hard to fit into the parody, but I just made one in this sentence.
 Commonly seen these days: "I was sick, I couldn't work." Totally Illiterate. Mario Puzo's novel "The Godfather" did this constantly, but do you really want to sound like an immigrant gangster? You have only two thoughts there, so your options are:
a) A period (or full stop, as the Brits say): "I was sick. I couldn't work."
b) A semicolon, as in the example;
c) A conjunction, such as "and", "but", "so", etc.: "I was sick, so I couldn't work."
If you had three or more thoughts that were connected enough that you didn't want to make three sentences, you could use commas and a final "and" to join them: "I had the flu, it was snowing, and the Super Bowl was on." Leaving out the final "and" in this list and using only commas ("I had the flu, it was snowing, the Super Bowl was on") sounds like mental diarrhea. Quit running on and finish it up!
Colons, semicolons, and parentheses are disappearing because people don't know how or where to use them, so any time some sort of mark seems called for, they just throw in a comma. Cell text messages, IMs, and short attention spans don't help, either.
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|How Funny: ||4.9|
|Overall Rating: ||5.0|
|Total Votes: ||17|
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