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Song Parodies -> "Coldfinger"

Original Song Title:

"Goldfinger"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Shirley Bassey

Parody Song Title:

"Coldfinger"

Parody Written by:

Rick Duncan

The Lyrics

He's my Doc, the man with the anal touch
Enjoys too much
Such a bold finger
Says that he must enter your nether eye
He'll probe and pry

Modern tools he has just for your rear
Doesn't smirk while at work, doesn't leer
And you can't be shy about a blister
It's the clammy hand from

Mister Coldfinger

You have to get this done when you get old
You must be bold

This is the procedure that you just fear
When he goes for the hose, eyes will tear
He won't care if it's you or your sister
It's the clammy hand from

Mister Coldfinger

Hope the test says you will live to be old
That hand was cold
It felt really cold
Frickin' cold
Ice cube cold
It was goddam cold
North Pole cold
Really cold

Your Vote & Comment Counts

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
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 4   0
 0
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 5   9
 9
 9
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Johnny D - September 04, 2004 - Report this comment
Sounds like he works in the same clinic as my proctologist, Dr. Boldfinger:

http://www.amiright.com/parody/60s/shirleybasseyjamesb­ondmovietheme0.shtml
Johnny D - September 04, 2004 - Report this comment
Hmm, pasting that link into my previous comment caused Chucky's anti-spammer software to introduce a bogus " - " hyphen character between the "b" and the "ond" of "bond".

When you paste that link into your browser, be sure to remove that bogus hyphen, and then click "Go", and it should work OK.
Rick D - September 04, 2004 - Report this comment
I just go to your list.
Guy - September 04, 2004 - Report this comment
This one ain't hard to finger out. The glove has five fingers andcoincidentally it's the same number as my vote. You and JD plan this today? Your songs seem to 'goinside' or coincide today. Go finger.
Paul Robinson - September 04, 2004 - Report this comment
Rick - sends shivers down my spine - (and up it, too) 5's
Michael Pacholek - September 04, 2004 - Report this comment
I'm afraid I'm gonna have to recycle a comment, first used for Malcolm's "The Rectum of Edmund Fitzgerald," but it's worth it: I believe this one deserves a toast. Bottoms up!
alvin rhodes - September 05, 2004 - Report this comment
after readin' your's and johnny's back to back, my butt's startin' to itch a little...funny one...5s
Know 1 can hear you dream - September 05, 2004 - Report this comment
5:5:5
(Five, colon, five, colon, five)
Bob Gomez - September 05, 2004 - Report this comment
This one should make it onto the proctology album with Malcolm's "It's Still Colonoscopy." 555 d;:^)

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