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Song Parodies -> "Sedentary Man"

Original Song Title:

"Solitary Man"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Neil Diamond

Parody Song Title:

"Sedentary Man"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

*Rudy Galindo; 1996 U.S. figure-skating national champion
Sedentary Man

Galindo* took flight
Over ice,
Then he bounded
In a spin
Man, he's trim!

His triple Lutz, long.
Must be strong
To do this sport.
He's into
Fitness. I grew.

I sit here and swill
A glass filled with nonlite beer.
Unlike Rudy,
I watch movies—don't take flight here.
I'll be on my can—
A sedentary man,
Sedentary man.

My gut's out to here
From that beer—
Love handles curl
Past belt ring,
And they swing.

I know it's been fun,
Eatin' tons—
Cheese curls and cheese
Could get strong,
Play ping-pong.

But I'd rather kill
Time and swill wine and then cheer
My team on TV;
They run and writhe; I just sit here
On my spreading can—
A sedentary man,
Sedentary man.


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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.0
Overall Rating: 4.0

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   1
 0
 0
 
 5   3
 3
 3
 

User Comments

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Johnny D - July 01, 2004 - Report this comment
If I tried to skate like Galindo, I'd wipe-out with a Triple-Klutz. Good job, JB.
Rod Worden - July 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Sometimes I think the LOLs (and their variations) are over-used. But I really did LOL, and am now going to read this again, I liked it so. Big 5s, John!
John Barry - July 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, JD and RW!
Adagio - July 01, 2004 - Report this comment
http://www.amiright.com/parody/70s/neildiamond30.shtml...same subject
Michael Pacholek - July 03, 2004 - Report this comment
Neil Diamond is one of those guys whose work just screams, "Parody me!" As for Rudy Galindo, he's one of the top male figure skaters of all time... not that there's anything wrong with that. But if I wanna see guys with funny names skate... I may be in trouble, since there's a good chance the next NHL season won't start on time.

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