Song Parodies -> You're Sixteen, I'm Forty-Nine, And You're Jail
| Original Song Title: | "You're Sixteen" |
| Original Performer: | Johnny Burnette (covered by Ringo Starr) |
| Parody Song Title: | "You're Sixteen, I'm Forty-Nine, And You're Jail" |
| Parody Written by: | Tommy Turtle |
The downside of having so many creative geniuses at AmIRight is that you can come up with a brilliant parody idea, scribble it out, fine-tune it, go to submit it, and then find out that Rick Duncan did it three years ago. Memo to self: Next time, check the archives before writing, not after. Well, as the Turtle always says, "Great minds run in the same gutter". Having done all this work, I might as well post it anyway - most of the words are different.
Ooh,
You come on hot to me
My fantasy
Skin soft, silky, and pale
You're sixteen, I'm forty-nine, and you're jail
You're next door neighbor's girl
Virginal pearl
Sit for my daughter, Gail
You're sixteen, I'm forty-nine, and you're jail
Ba-by-sitter
Loves to pet
Just one thing that we ain't done yet
Against the law
To cherry-pop
So, ooh, when we kiss
It's there we stop!
Ooh,
You walked out of my dreams
To work for my wife
Tempting teenager tail
You're sixteen, I'm forty-nine, and you're jail
So, I'm beggin' you, please
Down on my knees
(While here, sniff and inhale)
You're sixteen, I'm forty-nine, and you're jail
You're a hottie
Make me sweat
We start to smooch and my pants get wet
Go all the way?
Mom calls a cop
And I hate jail
My putz' gonna pop!
Ooh,
You're Lolita in flesh
So young and fresh
Legal worries assail
You're sixteen, I'm forty-nine, and you're jail
How I ache as I ail
Whine, moan and wail
But, I can't afford bail
You're sixteen, I'm forty-nine, and you're jail
You're my little
Pussy-cat
Touch me where I could hang my hat
In see-through shirt
Pink mi-ni-skirt
I need you bad
My balls really hurt!
Ooh,
You sun-bathe in your string
Show ev'rything
Stuff I'd so love to nail
You're sixteen, I'm forty-nine, and you're jail
Seeing pert pubic crop
Warm and wet mop
Will my willpower fail?
You're sixteen, I'm forty-nine, and you're jail
Nubile baby
Nude nymph-ette
Pout, perk-y point-ers; sprout such a set
I meet you at
The high school hop
Then we sneak off
To lingerie shop!
Ooh,
Fun and fox-y fe-male
Read you in Braille
God, it's "hard" to be male
You're sixteen, I'm forty-nine, and you're jail
Really rant, rave, and rail
Quake for that quail
Sex life with wife: so stale
You're sixteen, I'm forty-nine, and you're jail
Take you ridin'
In my 'Vette
We're making out on the day we met
It's twen-ty years
If pants I drop
No, can't get caught
With teeny-bop!
Ooh,
You 're so fragile and frail
Fly you to Vail
Have Feds hot on my trail
You're sixteen, I'm forty-nine, and you're jail
Pull-ing pri-son de-tail?
Walls I would scale
Get you, my Holy Grail
You're sixteen, I'm forty-nine, and you're jail
You're sixteen, I'm forty-nine, and you're jail!
You come on hot to me
My fantasy
Skin soft, silky, and pale
You're sixteen, I'm forty-nine, and you're jail
You're next door neighbor's girl
Virginal pearl
Sit for my daughter, Gail
You're sixteen, I'm forty-nine, and you're jail
Ba-by-sitter
Loves to pet
Just one thing that we ain't done yet
Against the law
To cherry-pop
So, ooh, when we kiss
It's there we stop!
Ooh,
You walked out of my dreams
To work for my wife
Tempting teenager tail
You're sixteen, I'm forty-nine, and you're jail
So, I'm beggin' you, please
Down on my knees
(While here, sniff and inhale)
You're sixteen, I'm forty-nine, and you're jail
You're a hottie
Make me sweat
We start to smooch and my pants get wet
Go all the way?
Mom calls a cop
And I hate jail
My putz' gonna pop!
Ooh,
You're Lolita in flesh
So young and fresh
Legal worries assail
You're sixteen, I'm forty-nine, and you're jail
How I ache as I ail
Whine, moan and wail
But, I can't afford bail
You're sixteen, I'm forty-nine, and you're jail
You're my little
Pussy-cat
Touch me where I could hang my hat
In see-through shirt
Pink mi-ni-skirt
I need you bad
My balls really hurt!
Ooh,
You sun-bathe in your string
Show ev'rything
Stuff I'd so love to nail
You're sixteen, I'm forty-nine, and you're jail
Seeing pert pubic crop
Warm and wet mop
Will my willpower fail?
You're sixteen, I'm forty-nine, and you're jail
Nubile baby
Nude nymph-ette
Pout, perk-y point-ers; sprout such a set
I meet you at
The high school hop
Then we sneak off
To lingerie shop!
Ooh,
Fun and fox-y fe-male
Read you in Braille
God, it's "hard" to be male
You're sixteen, I'm forty-nine, and you're jail
Really rant, rave, and rail
Quake for that quail
Sex life with wife: so stale
You're sixteen, I'm forty-nine, and you're jail
Take you ridin'
In my 'Vette
We're making out on the day we met
It's twen-ty years
If pants I drop
No, can't get caught
With teeny-bop!
Ooh,
You 're so fragile and frail
Fly you to Vail
Have Feds hot on my trail
You're sixteen, I'm forty-nine, and you're jail
Pull-ing pri-son de-tail?
Walls I would scale
Get you, my Holy Grail
You're sixteen, I'm forty-nine, and you're jail
You're sixteen, I'm forty-nine, and you're jail!
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User Comments Follow...
Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.
fun to sing along with...great job
Shame on you, for writing such a clever parody...
Thanks, alvin and AFW! Yes, I'm very ashamed....
Much funnier than Jim Croce's "Five Short Minutes Of Loving (gave me 25 years in jail)" 555! Now, how come I don't have neighbors like that? :-)
QC79, thanks! Probably safer that you don't....
The age of consent in VA I believe is 16. TMGLTM but "Read you in Braille" was my favorite. 3 5s (or 15 years if my knowledge of VA law is not accurate).
Well done on a touchy subject. All 5's. When is visiting day?
Red Ant, thanks! Lots of acronyms thrown to this n00b, but I'm guessing: Too Many Good Lines To Mention? - in which case, TUVM., and feel free to mention all the good lines you want to...
I think it's 16 in the Netherlands, 14 in Kentucky, 12 in Arkansas... For the record, I've never messed with anyone under 12 except once, and that doesn't count, 'cause she was my sister....
Dirty Hairy, thanks! Had visiting privileges revoked for putting inappropriate material on the 'Net, but thanks for asking :)
I think it's 16 in the Netherlands, 14 in Kentucky, 12 in Arkansas... For the record, I've never messed with anyone under 12 except once, and that doesn't count, 'cause she was my sister....
Dirty Hairy, thanks! Had visiting privileges revoked for putting inappropriate material on the 'Net, but thanks for asking :)
Arkansas is also accommodating for threesomes, aslong as their COMBINED ages are over 12.
Great parody, too.
Great parody, too.
Luke, thanks!
And for Dubya's spies snooping on this site, all of this was a joke! A JOKE, got it?! Now, go catch some real bad guys!
And for Dubya's spies snooping on this site, all of this was a joke! A JOKE, got it?! Now, go catch some real bad guys!
Very funny.
Larry, thanks.
Well, considering how long Turtles lives, 49 should be a misspent youth. This parody was an American beauty. (I'm presuming you get the joke.) As for Dubya catching bad guys, he ain't exactly good at that, is he? Come to think of it, Osama bin Laden turns 49 this year. Had Bush kept his promise, bin Laden would've been dead at 44. Ant: Actually, in Virginia, 14 is the age of consent, as long as you're married first. (Just a joke... I hope!)
Michael, yes, liked the movie joke, and that flick flitted thru head once or twice while writing this... thanks.
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This is view # 117
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