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Song Parodies -> "Aisle"

Original Song Title:

"Style"

Original Performer:

Taylor Swift

Parody Song Title:

"Aisle"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Part of my "50 Shades of Pop" self-challenge. Dude needs to pick up some groceries, but he picked the worst place to shop...
It's five
Just got off work and as part of my
Long home drive
I stopped at a supermarket, but I
Can't stand it, du-ude, oh
So hard to find out where they stashed the apple juice
Apple juice
You see, I'm new to this place and I
Notice that all of the labelled signs
Are made of just absolute lie-ies

Where is the whipped cream? Should be here but the sign
Doesn't care to mention where it is, I don't like
When in circles I go round, giant waste of my time
Shouldn't be this damn hard to find the accurate numbered aisle
This sucks, it's not fair, I can't find cra-ap-all
There's no logic to this place, no order, I'm appalled
It goes jelly beans, chips, brown soda, tuna then rice
They've made it way too hard to find what you want in ev'ry aisle

Man, this blows
Bakery's not divided by dough, mmm
Asked and lo
Got waved off as a "gluten-freak joke", hmm-mm, yeah
That guy's a je-erk, oh
The whole staff, in fact, are dismissive, lazy berks
Don't want to work
All I wanted was some food, but I
Might be lookin' for two weeks, I
Don't wanna be stuck here 'til I die-ie

It's real hard to believe that these workers aren't high
Givin' vague directions to where the Froot Loops lie
There's other places in town but I picked this one, why?
It's way too friggin' hard to find the accurate numbered ai-aisle
It's so haphazard how the food's a-arranged
Swear it's like they used a dartboard to design this place (this nutty place)
It goes broccoli, dip, round biscuits, noodles then limes
They've made it way too hard to find (where'd the lamb go?) what you want in ev'ry aisle
Want to kno-o-ow (oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)
Where'd the milk go-o-o (oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)?
Yeah-eah, it's such a loa-oa-oad (oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)
Ooh-oh-ooh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
In which aisle (oh)?

I know that I shou-ould leave qui-uickly, afraid that I
Can't do that cause there's six thousand folks here, looks like
Packed in like sardines (they all frown), all frownin' cause they cannot find
A single friggin' thing, just like me, so lost inside these aisles

Okay, there's a lot more that could've gone wrong. The shelves could be half-empty, the other customers could be violent, the in-store radio could be playing Silentó, lots of things.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 3.1
How Funny: 3.1
Overall Rating: 3.1

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
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 2   2
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 3   1
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 4   1
 1
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 5   3
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 3
 

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