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Song Parodies -> "Mildest Dreams"

Original Song Title:

"Wildest Dreams"

Original Performer:

Taylor Swift

Parody Song Title:

"Mildest Dreams"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Part of my "50 Shades of Pop" self-challenge. The stuff that dreams are made of...if dreams were made of the most bland, generic things imaginable.
End of the day's when you wind down
Drift all the way to sleep, head to Sandman to-own
But I don't have normal dreams now
Wait no, they are normal
But that's the problem, they're letdo-owns
You might dream 'bout walking through hell
Punching Nazis and Satan a-as we-e-ell
I just dream about ham sandwiches
Not even lots of the-em

Nothing weird when I slee-eep
I just dream about chess, playing till I sa-ay checkmate
Boring as dreams can be-e
Never turn absurdist, always such a mundane bore
Mi-ildest drea-ea-eams, ah-ah-ha-ah
Mi-ildest drea-ea-eams, ah-ah-ha-ah

They say "What did you dream 'bout last night, dude?"
One guy flew through the ai-air, the other banged a broo-oom
He swears he doesn't swing that way no-ow
My turn to deliver:
"I dreamed a dream about co-ows"
They say "What about them?" "It's, well
I milked o-one" "That's all? What in the-e he-e-ell?"
"I also dreamt I had guns that missed"
"You suck at games, no shit"

My dreams don't get trippy-y
No chairs that get possessed, I just wake up the-e next day
Ti-ired as I can be-e
My brain's very standard, dreaming about empty dra-awers
Mi-ildest drea-ea-eams, ah-ah-ha-ah (hah-ah-ha-ah-ah)
Mi-ildest drea-ea-eams, ah-ah-ha-ah

There's no bright, flashing lights
Childhood toys that come to life
None of that now
I'm just watching TV
Seen this already
The worst dreams, hands down
Nothing to give me fright
No spiders inside my eyes
They're so (they're so) dull (dull) now (now)
I might just fall asleep
While still in the dream
Or at (or at) least (least) pass out
Pass right the hell out

That might be int'resti-ing
I would make a ref'rence to Inception, dated, mate
And that film I've not see-een
So it would be stupid, just like my dream about pens
No super-strength for me-e-e-e
Just a load of mailmen delivering sta-atements late, geez
Somebody tell me, plea-ease
What's so wrong in my head that all my dreams are a bore (I have dreamt about he-ens)?
Mi-ildest drea-ea-eams, ah-ah-ha-ah (ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah)
Got the mi-ildest drea-ea-eams, ah-ah-ha-ah
Dreams 'bout stencils by the sco-ore
Mi-ildest drea-ea-eams, ah-ah-ha-ah
Ha-ave the mi-ildest drea-ea-eams, ah-ah-ha-ah

My dreams are less boring and more infrequent. And disproportionately school-related. And occasionally balls-out cuckoo pants.

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Pacing: 4.1
How Funny: 4.1
Overall Rating: 4.1

Total Votes: 7

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